First ever date. Help!

No-Platform-2184 · 2021-08-24T18:31:05+00:00

No flowers, hug is good idea, keep the compliment light "You look nice!"
"I'll get it this time, you can get it next time"
No, don't play that game. Definitely don't talk --- unless she's whispering to you, then match.
Definitely hug if you did at the beginning. I would recommend not driving straight home after the movie, have a second thing of interest to see or do. Even if it's just grabbing a drink to talk about the movie. As long as it gives you time to talk and get to know each other.

Peelfest2016 · 2021-08-24T18:29:58+00:00

You’re picking her up and dropping her off? I would say that she is expecting it to be a date based on that alone.

Definitely tell her she looks nice, but don’t over do it. A general, you look great! Followed by a more specific I like your shoes or earrings or something about her outfit. Flowers aren’t a bad thing necessarily, but the reception to them really depends on the woman. If you’re not confident that would be something she would like I’d skip it. I would go for a hug when you pick her up. Sets the tone immediately that you’re there for a date and you’re interested. Make sure when you get to her place you go up to the door and get her. Do not text her to come out and for fuck’s sake do not honk the horn to let her know you’re there.

Just assume you’re paying for everything. Almost all women expect the man to pay on the first date. Later dates may start to become more 50/50. I wouldn’t worry about offending her by paying for everything. Go ahead and pay and if she offers to pay for a portion just tell her she can pay next time, but tonight is your treat.

I wouldn’t use a “move” in the theatre. At some point throughout the movie when her hand is available confidently (but gently) take her hand. If the hand isn’t available, don’t worry about it. This may go against popular opinion on this sub, but I never worry about escalating anything physical on the first date. Especially if this is a person I’m genuinely interested in starting a relationship with. If you’re looking for a few rounds in the hay rack and then going your separate ways than go for broke on the escalation.

End of the night, tell her if you had a good time. Let her know you’d like to see her again (assuming you would). Walk her to her door. Go for a kiss if it seems right. If not, go for a hug instead.

Woujo · 2021-08-24T20:23:11+00:00

Read this article: https://www.woujo.com/blog/2021/6/14/biggest-mistakes-men-make-on-dates

DunionKnight · 2021-08-24T21:21:12+00:00

No flowers. That’s a romantic gesture, and this is your first date. Save that for when you’re in a relationship. Smile and go in for a hug. This establishes the premise that physical touch with you is normal and acceptable. So when you both joke and tease each other you can gently push her away. Touch her on the arm when you lean in and tell her something. Say you should hold hands because that one girl over there looked like your ex. Or say, “is this the part where we hold hands and fall madly in love? We should try for the sake of our Ivy League kids.” Gradually becoming more comfortable being close. Sitting in a park bench with your arm over here. Carrying the conversation all the way through. Backing off if you notice she needs to build more comfort. Being okay if this and/or a kiss happens over several times meeting up. One thing I like doing, if things went well, is tell her how much you hated the date. “It was awful, we laughed, had ice cream, you made me smile. You’ve got one more chance to make it up to me.” Gauge her response and go from there. Set up something when you two are able.
There’s a lot of contention surrounding the idea of who should pay. Cover the date. But make sure to plan first dates as low investment. I would have suggested going to the park and throwing a frisky, playing soccer, or throwing a football. Then going for a walk. Set the frame as hanging out that has the potential to become date-like and/or romantic.
& 4. Look at 1

Go for a run. Nothing too intense. But something that works up a sweat and gets out this nervous energy. Think of how you would spend time with a friend. Enjoy the experience instead of worrying about every moment. That’s the point. To enjoy yourself. If things work. Great. If not. That’s okay too.

Edit: Shower, brush your teeth, use a little cologne on moisturized skin, and dress in a way that’s comfortable and moderately fashionable. Clean sneakers like Converse, fitted jeans, t-shit, and light bomber jacket for example. This is a longer conversation we can have another time. Do what you can now and revisit this later. You don’t have to be perfect. Only your best self, on your best day, with no limitations, today, as you enjoy spending time with a girl your curious about getting to know.

SleepMastery · 2021-08-24T21:46:24+00:00

During the movie projection it can happen that you become very nervous: thinking what to do or tell her, observing her... You may not be able to pay attention to the movie, so maybe you lose track of the plot. As a consequence it will make you more nervous realizing that you are not understanding the movie and not enjoying it.

So my advice is: go to watch the movie first on your own. That way you will get it completely and analyse it, you can think of some clever joke, detail or interpretation. You can also read some critique about it. During the date you will not get nervous by splitting your attention, the situay will be more familiar and you can result as a really intelligent and interesting guy.

I have never done such a thing, but I thought this after my first date when I realized that it may be a good idea.

prettydirtyboy · 2021-08-25T01:21:19+00:00

All I can say is next time no movie. Something more interactive. Movie first date all you are is 2 ppl who came to watch a movie, barely building a connection

Shadoweddy · 2021-08-25T05:35:18+00:00

Definitely hug and establish physical contact ASAP

Title	First ever date. Help!
Author	Rainervondeutsch
Upvotes	15
Comments	25
Date	August 24, 2021 6:17 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/pasybp/first_ever_date_help/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/first-ever-date-help.1277627 https://theredarchive.com/post/1277627

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