[FR] Disappointment

slcjosh · 2013-07-18T15:57:06+00:00

way to get out and start. as you do it more, you will get better so dont beat yourself up over one not so great night. My only suggestion is stop asking girls to dance. that gives them an option to say no. instead, extend your hand to them with your most confident body language you have. dont say shit. just stare them in the eye with that "i am going to sleep with you" look, extend your arm and take them by the hand and MAKE them dance with you. they will eat it up as long as you are confident. from my experience, asking a girl to dance is beta, its nice guy. be alpha, be a bad mofo. just take her by the hand, spin her, and then pull her into you. she will love it.

pre_nerf_infestor · 2013-07-18T11:49:28+00:00

"No, You just aren't the right skin color."

What?

On topic: Not sure if it's considered rude to object to a mod or whatever but I honestly don't like Tofu's guide very much, chiefly because it makes a initially very tough thing seem too easy and wreck newbie motivation with the shock of its actual difficulty.

Also because his quote unquote misogynist language and confrontational attitude got all seduction material banned from Kickstarter. That doesn't really help things either.

I would caution you about going out and "doing reps". It's better than doing nothing, sure, but working hard definitely doesn't beat working smart. Newcomers have terrible game, will most likely get rejected, that's a fact; but if you simply go out and approach approach approach, your failure will cement itself in your mind. You will expect to get rejected, it will become the normal outcome--and that is not going to help you.

pschr · 2013-07-18T11:21:12+00:00

Well, it seems as if you did know all the theory but was unlucky and immobilised mentally by your AA. I had to look up the Apocalypse Opener, but that seems like a great strategy when it is done with the right attitude. OP, maybe you had a rough night, but you did at least inspire a fellow sedditor. Thanks for doing so, mate!

evolvedtomato · 2013-07-18T14:09:27+00:00

Wait what? Not the right skin color? More background, OP?

kryptonyk · 2013-07-18T17:23:30+00:00

It's good that you put yourself out there, OP. I am going to be honest with what I think but please know I'm only saying it to try and help. The problem is I don't see a single opener here that makes you seem different than any other AFC out there. I feel like the effort wasn't quite there. You were (maybe drunkenly?) going around asking "how are you?" but were you maintaining strong, confident eye contact, getting in their personal space, and demanding their attention? Next time follow up with a compliment about her style or whatever you like about her. Give her a reason to really respond. That, or do something crazy/physical and just really take a chance.

jppbkm · 2013-07-18T18:56:48+00:00

In your interactions you are leaching/taking value rather than giving it. What I mean by this is you are forcing her to build a conversation, and not in a unique or attractive way. "How are you doing?" puts the conversational responsibility on her. Try this instead. Go up to a girl and use the words "I hate" or "I love" and a random subject. "I hate Metallica." While it will initially seem weird, this will at least get the conversation rolling. "I love salad." Then build upon this. "I love salad. Tomatoes, cucumbers, olives, feta, nuts, dried cranberries, AMAZING!" She will respond based upon your conversational foundation. In this way, YOU are directing the conversation in a unique and attractive way. Have fun with it. "I love Sesame Street." "I hate yoga." Good luck!

psyocal · 2013-07-19T06:17:23+00:00

First of all, congratulations on opening your mouth. That is probably the hardest thing out of this whole scenario. Now let's get into the breakdown:

As soon as I read your second question, I knew the female would not be interested...she won't be interested 99% of the time (the 1% is if you were incredibly attractive in her eyes <-- which also doesn't guarantee anything [I'll explain later]).

There's a simple solution to your problem: DON'T ask, but TELL

You would've had a much better shot if you walked up to her in confidence - the type of confidence where you had not a single doubt in your mind that she would refuse your offer - asked, "Hey, how are you?" and before she would even respond, grab her, pull her over to you and start dancing as you say, "let's dance/we should dance/I love dancing." <-- feel free to add something random like, "...cupcakes, and long walks on the beach (as you stare her directly in the eyes)" - no matter what you look like, most women will become greatly attracted to your confident demeanor.

Handling a woman

You may not be able to pull off that maneuver because you're not used to grabbing a woman the right way. Be firm, but not overly aggressive. Like a gentle caveman. I don't know what it is with these grabs but women seem to go nuts over them. You can work your way up by gently touching her lower back as you lean over to say something, her elbows and bicep and wrist are also great places to 'latch on'. Remember the whole point of touching her is so she becomes familiar with you, and the grab is a way to lead her to you.

Places where not to touch her

Crotch, breasts and ass...there's an exception for the breasts and ass, assuming she grabs yours first ;) <--- you can always use that against her if she gives you some crap about getting 'grabby' "Let's not forget who grabbed whose tit first" <--- I've done it several times and it works like a charm.

In my experience pulling a woman, who seemed not to have interest in you, around and continuing a question in a seductive manor is one of the best ways to get her attracted to you. As a matter of fact, one live example was where a girl started walking away from me, I grabbed her by the arm (gently), pulled her around/towards me (semi-gently), then grabbed her lower back and really pressed body against body (not so gently) as I maintained direct eye-contact and a perverted smile (perverted because I genuinely had her on my mind, and I was letting her know) and said, "You're like a magnet for me, I keep getting drawn in."

Weeks later she kept mentioning how much that turned her on.

Getting back to the whole "the 1% is if you were incredibly attractive in her eyes" part; let me put it this way. Women don't view us, like we view them. The best way to think of it is like talking to a blind bat. Maintain good posture, a non-jittery frame, eye contact and a smile. The rest will fall into place. For all she knows, in her eyes she'll be talking to Brad Pitt.

bondinspace · 2013-07-19T20:41:22+00:00

Let me guess, UNC girls?

gosurobber · 2013-07-18T08:04:27+00:00

Why are you asking them questions? Open them by making a crazy statement.

Title	[FR] Disappointment
Author	SelfdestructV2
Upvotes	3
Comments	20
Date	July 18, 2013 6:45 AM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1ijm48/fr_disappointment/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/fr-disappointment.1355603 https://theredarchive.com/post/1355603

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