Once you beat AA the first time, you'd think the next time you do it, it'll be gone. But nope, it's still there clinging on to you. I realized the hard way that AA doesn't go away, and it hit me the hardest today. Anyways, here's what happened.

I went to the mall because my whole family went out doing their own thing individually, so I thought, well hey I'm off. fuck it, I'm going to the mall. So l drove there and walked around a bit, and I saw a girl that made my heart race. That's how I knew, I had to approach.

We met eye contact, and I was walking her way, but I walked past her. I clenched my fist and I wanted to scream at myself for not saying anything. AA was letting me be his bitch.

I gave myself excuses and said the angle wasn't right, so I had to find her and try again. Three times we crossed paths, we made eye contact again and I told myself, just wave. Do something! Do anything! But I just couldn't.

So after beating myself up about it, I realized just how important it is to do something, say anything, right when you see that potential special someone. It doesn't matter how, but whatever happens do not let it be "when."

Otherwise you'll end up feeling in a shithole, and potentially lose out on the love of your life or whatever.

When you see someone that creates that feeling to approach, those first few seconds that passes by will and could be the most important seconds of your life.

This is what I learned today.