Overwatch.

A 6v6 multiplayer game where players choose an unique 'hero' with abilities to enhance your team and combat. Matches will consist of objectives like capture the flag. With the different heros and abilities available it introduces different team composition, strengths, weakness, counters etc... They are generally classified under 3 roles:

Tanks - Lots of health and defense. Generally weak attack but usually have strong abilities that can interrupt your opponent's gameplay.

DPS - Capable of dishing out damage but usually weak in terms of health.

Healers - Healing capabilities. Low health and weak damage output.

I was an avid console gamer but decided to build a PC. This was the first PC shooter game that I got into HEAVILY as I enjoyed it so much. It was a shooter that had deep tactical and strategic principal built into it. However, I was TERRIBLE at the game as a DPS (pistol hero). I would just constantly die and perform terribly. It was so frustrating and disappointing to be stuck in a shit rank considering how passionate I was (played this game pretty much on my free time). So what could I do to rank up? I could have:

  • Blamed the matching making system and be contend with that
  • Blame my teammates for their 'bigger' misplays
  • Improve my gameplay

The matchmaking system was certainly not perfect (had a stupid faulty coin flip mechanic that made no sense whatsoever), would have some games with smurfs (higher skilled folks playing in lower tiers for fun) and have games where teammates were not playing optimally. But all these mentioned issues were things I had no control over. I could toil and lament at them but nothing would get changed other than grinding the games till I got lucky with a series of coin flips. Or I could instead really think about what I did wrong and what I could do to improve.

Every time I died I would think what did I do wrong no matter what. Could the team have helped me and done more? Sure. But again I don't have the ability to control and wrestle 5 other players on my team let alone worry about the 6 enemy players who are looking to hump my dead body. If I was away from my team and I died then I figured that I was out of position. If I died because I was attempting to duel someone with less health then I figured why did I force a fight with low health instead of healing up etc...

Once my personal skills were adequate I could re-focus that energy onto other things like managing my team. I would start reflecting our team engagements and notice flaws like:

  • The tank not holding space and the front line correctly which was important and cornerstone of tank gameplay as this allows teammates to attack from different angles safely due to the increased real estate
  • DPS engaging the enemy at bad timings instead of waiting till the team had the enemy's attention from fully engaging which will allow the DPS to flank and attack forcing the enemy to play a gambit due to split attention
  • Picking heros correctly to counter the enemy
  • Timing abilities better to fully maximize the effectiveness (keeping the ability ready to counter a troubling enemy)

While I can see these issues I have to notify and effectively message the team. This would mean I had to work on my communication skills by not blaming/attacking the player but rather suggest an option and explain why in a constructive manner. Over time developing reflective and social skills allowed me to improve MASSIVELY and fly through the ranked matches to a high ranked tier.

Afterwards I started applying these skillsets into my life and dating. Reflecting on why I felt unattractive from the lack of dating opportunities made me start asking questions which led me down rabbit holes. From there I just devoured reading materials on google on subjects like fashion, cooking, social skills etc... It was as simple as typing 'reddit male fashion attractive' and opening several tabs per link (pro tip: having cheap clothes fit properly will always look better than a $100 shirt that is too baggy). Wanna workout but the meals are bland and taste bad? Learn how to cook properly and experiment (pro tip: learn how to properly sear and utilize pan sauce to introduce flavor and umami to recover a dry chicken breast).

The road to self improvement is a daunting path. It is NOT easy but it is a rewarding experience when you gain that habit/skill. Learn to ask questions and be humble. Being angry and scornful will quite literally get you nowhere so why place all your bets on a deteoriating health vs at least trying. Do you really wanna die in a meager way or go down fighting?