How do I stop being such a goof?

FrozenFirebat · 2015-08-04T18:36:27+00:00

I'm a goofy guy too. Learn to own it, and it allows you to make bigger moves. Ever notice that when your silly and the center of attention that a girl will challenge your frame? It proves an opportunity to switch gears and assert dominance. That contrast between harmless fun and heart pounding intensity drives girls wild.

As an example, The other day I was making an ass of myself like I always am and this girl looks at me and tells me that I can be so annoying sometimes. I drop my silly smile, get a little smirk on, and slide right close up to her and say, "I can be a lot of things, sometimes." And then i'm free to clown around again because her challenge is broken now.

CrushHazard · 2015-08-04T17:15:58+00:00

Well yeah, the people who know you well will think that something is off. What you really want is to be able to gauge a stranger's reaction to your "new" persona.

Really though, you don't want to be too much of anything. Attracting women is all about balance.

browngoku · 2015-08-05T02:31:54+00:00

Don't try and be James Bond. Embrace your inner Tony Stark.

WhosCountin · 2015-08-05T13:53:11+00:00

I don't think you should try and change your goofy personality, but I would bet there are specific aspects of your mannerisms, tonality, etc. that could be adjusted for major effects.

Alternatively, you could squash your goofiness out by putting yourself through horrible emotionally devastating situations. My goofiness definitely completely disappeared when my girlfriend secretly relapsed on heroin and benzos and had an affair and twisted my head around for a week or two while I still didn't know what was quite going on. There are a thousand more details that make it more cruel and calculated and basically the level of complete deception has really fucked up my ability to trust; now it seems like anyone could secretly be a sociopath who is capable of anything, and the worst case scenario is always worse than you can even imagine. Actually, I completely lost any sense of humor for a good month or so, and felt like my "self" had been irreversibly beaten out of existence, leaving an aggressive and psychotic shell who didn't see the point in humor.

Once the wound sealed up, I think my goofiness returned maybe 70%. But more importantly, during those weeks when I felt like I had just stumbled out of a nightmare, I learned what it feels like not to be reactive, not to try and entertain or please people, hold frame, and in general realize how low-risk social interaction is. Especially with a stranger who has no trust to betray with me.

This happened when I was 24, and it's really when I stopped acting like an adolescent and started acting like an adult man. I don't recommend any of this. Just learn to change some of your social reactions, not be too forcefully goofy, etc. I think a goofy sense of humor is pretty appealing if you're not a big fuckin goofball in your presentation overall

biggoof007 · 2015-08-16T21:02:36+00:00

Once a goof, always a goof!

Partyintheattic · 2015-08-04T22:46:38+00:00

seduction and goofiness are not mutually exclusive. you can't change your personality lol.

not_his_nibs · 2015-08-05T23:23:23+00:00

Hang out with women who don't already know you. Be less goofy. If you're good at being funny, because funny in a more sarcastic way.

Title	How do I stop being such a goof?
Author	SuperPoop
Upvotes	10
Comments	16
Date	August 4, 2015 5:08 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/3frnkd/how_do_i_stop_being_such_a_goof/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-i-stop-being-such-a-goof.1308823 https://theredarchive.com/post/1308823

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