How do you balance being yourself and altering aspects of yourself to win?

Western-Month-3877 · 2026-02-28T13:35:21+00:00

Think of yourself as fluid, not rigid. If you think you could become the best version of yourself, then do it.

I think I could have more success if I spoke a little slower, and lowered my pitch, but NATURALLY I don’t.

See, that’s where you got trapped by thinking that what you are now is natural. No it’s not. What we are has been molded for years by our surroundings (friends, upbringing, parents, etc). We thought it was natural because it’s molded very slowly. This is why method acting is used successfully by actors. They put aside their “real” self and learn a new one. The only difference is; method acting is just shortcutting the time, it’s not learned in years/decades but just weeks or months. It’s almost like changing an outfit.

I agree with you, guys need to speak a little slower with low pitch. It exudes masculinity and calmness. Start changing it. Practice it. Especially after puberty our voice is different to what it sounded like when we were a kid. Take advantage of that.

Imagine a muscular guy with decent outfit but once he speaks his tone is high-pitch and talks very fast. Add a flailing hand while talking and you know what kind of image he’s sending to people.

norwegiandoggo · 2026-02-28T14:00:58+00:00

Differ between short-term and long-term change.

Short-term change only works short-term. If you are willing to date someone short-term only - like bang her that night. Then this short-term change might be worth it. But it's tiring to keep up the fakery. Examples of short-term change is changing your tone of voice. You cannot keep this up for very long. Sooner or later your acting is going to get called out.

Long-term change works also in the long-term. You're not just putting on an act in the moment - you have actually become a different person. This works for dating someone for a very long time. An example is to work on your confidence in social situations - so that your voice is naturally calmer and steadier when talking to new people.

So it depends what your goal is: How quickly do you want to convert your prospect? How long do you intend to date her?

In general, long-term changes are better. But take more effort over time. They're better because once you have changed, you no longer need to think about it. Whereas short-term changes require active effort in the moment and often feels fake.

ApocalypticBroccoli · 2026-02-28T20:06:25+00:00

Altering myself in order to win is one of my core personality traits.

“You want to know how I did it, Vincent? Here’s how I did it: I never saved anything for the swim back.”

bmcapers · 2026-02-28T23:35:03+00:00

We have different versions of ourselves for different situations; work, family, friends, lovers.

Orange_Codex · 2026-03-01T05:25:19+00:00

Bunch of consumer products yapping in here.

Changing who you are is fine if you do it for yourself, or as a sacrifice for a loyal loved one who isn't getting what they need, but for strangers? No. You'll end up designed by a committee - a committee of imaginary inconstancies derived from (and creating) your own insecurity, emotionally detached from any success you might find because a fictional character is living your life.

To the extent we must all 'sell' ourselves (through fashion, attitude, and demeanour), at least pitch to your choice of person. Maybe that's venture capital bros, art chicks, skaters, le tig biddy goth gf - whoever you think would complement your life. But you know who it isn't, because they can't do that? Women who grow cold because you aren't some imaginary other person. I don't know exactly what kind of nonsense that is, but I know you'd better steer clear of it.

Title	How do you balance being yourself and altering aspects of yourself to win?
Author	professionalfumblr
Upvotes	8
Comments	9
Date	February 28, 2026 1:13 PM UTC (5 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1rh2bqw/how_do_you_balance_being_yourself_and_altering/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-you-balance-being-yourself-and-altering.1574434 https://theredarchive.com/post/1574434

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