how early to 'show intent' with work colleagues?

inneedofatherapist · 2016-12-14T09:20:05+00:00

Just innocently flirt and see if she picks it up. Go from there and just make sure you know the policies about such a thing before it goes too far

msmiitz · 2016-12-14T14:06:06+00:00

Do not show intent early as she has seniority and could potentially use this against you if it "doesn't work." I would wait and see what happens.

TheXXL · 2016-12-14T14:42:34+00:00

Forget the standard 'don't dip your pen in the company ink' answers.

I agree, the standard answer is stupid.

For one it's kind of hypothetical, and secondly, companies don't care about this kind of thing where I live

And here is where you show you don't understand the real problem. In most cases it is not about the company having a problem with your advances to a girl. Imagine you are a girl, working at a company, and somehow a guy comes up to you and shows strong interest in you sexually, or romantically. Now imagine that you are not interested, but also since you are a girl, you feel uncomfortable with straight up saying that. Add to that dilemma, that the guy is too oblivious to get that you are not interested, so he hits on you constantly. What are you supposed to do now, since you are working in that company, and maybe you like your job but there is this fucked up asshole constantly hitting on you? Right. There is no way out. You cannot just go away, you will have to return to work, in worst case 5 days a week.

Sure, the easy way is to say: no. I am not interested. Still, imagine the feeling to not being able to just go about your way, and what if the guy doesn't understand? Don't get me wrong, i don't want to sound like one of those stupid SJW's or feminazis, but it is a real problem. Same goes with women who are working, and you hitting on them. They can't "flee". This makes it harder to get her comfortable enough to be open to your advances.

Then next problem: What if you both like each other, and have a date, but then, one of you feel it's not going anywhere? You will have to see each other at work. It can be fucked up. I mean, sure, change jobs... but is it worth it? I don't want to change my job because of a girl.

Those are just two things to consider, and i once read the really fitting sentence: "dating a co worker is no problem as long you both are adults, and can make sure it's not getting messy" and i agree with that, but still, not everyone is mature enough to do that. So just keep that in mind.

And back to your question: Always be discreet. Most women would not want co-workers to gossip, even though they will anyways, but at least they want to feel like it's not because you both are too obvious. This means also, be professional at work. Kino is for instance a bit hard to pull off in this situation, but definitely possible as long as it's not too obvious. Other than that, show your intent as usual, and be careful about her reaction. She might show early on that she is definitely not interested, and you can avoid an awkward situation with stopping your advances right away. You can definitely flirt with her, lightly, but again, be aware of her reactions.

Title	how early to 'show intent' with work colleagues?
Author	suxess6
Upvotes	2
Comments	8
Date	December 14, 2016 9:17 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/5i9nvg/how_early_to_show_intent_with_work_colleagues/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-early-to-show-intent-with-work-colleagues.1417063 https://theredarchive.com/post/1417063

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