How to deal with oneitis?

theglassman32 · 2015-06-24T05:52:30+00:00

Well if you want to get rid of the oneitis, cut off contact. You will eventually stop thinking about her. It's really hard to force yourself NOT to text her or call her but you will thank yourself in a week or so. If she's not texting back, assume she's not interested or dead or whatever. The point is that it doesn't matter why she's not texting you back.

Just keep talking to other girls and focus on other things to get your mind off of her. You probably don't even want to talk to other girls at this point and that is fine. Maybe just take a break from game for a bit. That's what I did with my oneitis. I just took a step back and didn't focus on girls at all for a week. Now I'm back at it and I still think about this girl once in a while but it's not nearly as constant and obsessive as it was a couple weeks ago. Feel the pain now. Yes it hurts, it will go away as does all other types of pain. Just wait it out. However, keep active e.g. read books, play sports, focus on hobbies, talk to other women etc.

*EDIT: I just looked at old photos of me and this girl that I had oneitis with and a really sexual text exchange and brought all those old feelings back. Now I'm thinking about her again and getting sad again. So DON'T look at old things that remind you of her. Lol I learn something new everyday. All this is pretty basic knowledge but I guess I needed the first had reference experience to really hammer it in for me

Byizo · 2015-06-24T12:08:38+00:00

Yeah, I hate to break it to you but she isn't interested in you. I think what she is looking for is someone to give her attention without the need to reciprocate with anything physical. Don't be that guy. Stop texting her, stop looking at her stuff online, force yourself to act like she doesn't exist. Eventually she won't matter to you anymore. I had a 10 year long oneitis and go over it in a matter of weeks this way.

Also try to talk to girls in real life. It helps tremendously. You will start to see that this oneitis is nothing special. Dating sites/apps are fine, but they are a plan B to actually talking to girls.

DaygameCoach · 2015-06-24T16:01:43+00:00

Cut contact and sleep with a bunch of other women.

hit_the_noise · 2015-06-24T03:24:40+00:00

Realize it's likely a lost cause and delete the number so you physically can't keep texting her, if she wants to text you back then she will. You will probably get over the attachment after a couple days of no contact from such a casual relationship/ interest. It won't be like getting over a relationship. Seek validation elsewhere

internally (gym/ hobbies/ etc.
through other women (talking to ones you know already or approaching new women.
through participating within a your friend group or meeting up with some buddies.
whatever else you like (I can get into a book, for example)

Don't let this happen again by not associating casual encounters with emotional commitment, play things fast and loose until you know how it can potentially end up in terms of her feelings on settling down with you. There's nothing wrong with "dating" or "talking to" multiple women, even if you like one more then the others when you're not in an exclusive relationship. Id encourage it actually.

Title	How to deal with oneitis?
Author	UnderwaterPianos
Upvotes	6
Comments	4
Date	June 24, 2015 2:54 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/3awpw3/how_to_deal_with_oneitis/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-to-deal-with-oneitis.1390025 https://theredarchive.com/post/1390025

Comments