I just watched a girl who was totally into me get stolen out from under me right in front of my eyes because the other guy straight up had better game. This girl had been calling me trying to hang out for a week, and I had a bunch of chances to close, but I wussed out because I couldn't build a physical connection.

This other guy waltzed in, was aggressively handsy right in front of me, and eventually the girl must have decided that I wasn't going to make a move and he ended up getting her, despite the fact that he was shorter than her and that she had already made it abundantly clear that she was attracted to me (calling, aggressively suggesting times to hang out together, etc). Well done, other guy. I'm not even mad. Well... I'm a bit mad, because it's all my own damn fault. But at least I know what to work on next, because I'm pretty sure that if I'd taken any of the openings she gave me instead of wussing out, I'd be waking up over at her place right now instead of typing on reddit.

I've always been kind of "closed" physically, and was taught to be "respectful" as a kid by strict parents and to keep my hands to myself, especially around women. I just don't have that outgoing, touching everybody and everything casually vibe that some people pull off. What are some concrete steps to take to practice being a "touchy" person? I don't even care if it's not specific to women. I just want to break down the false mental wall I seem to have developed against touching people casually - if I can do that, I think I'll seem more natural, and luck with women will follow. Where are the lines? What's too far? How do you push those things and learn to be better at them? Any good books to read about this stuff?

I just got out of a long-term relationship a while back, and had a rough breakup recently that sapped a bunch of my confidence, and I'm still getting my head on right again. I know I can't worry too much about one girl here and there, but this is a serious issue with me right now, and I have to deal with it in order to be the guy I want to be. Any help you can give me would be much appreciated.

tl;dr Shhhh... I'ma touch you now...