I'm 26 now and haven't been dating or doing much in the past three years, just surviving not feeling control of my life. I've gone from job to job, been through extreme ups and downs, drug addiction, depression, losing/winning large amounts of $, moving countries, homelessness just a lot. Now I'm a waiter, after being homeless, and addicted to coke, starting to get stability, but still lost.

Ran through girls from 18-21 because I thought sex would get rid of the emptiness feeling, now I've been wanting connection but feel like there is a lot wrong with me and I don't have my life together. I'm attractive and in shape, get enough looks and compliments but just mentally there's a lot holding me back and it's just too much, I'm scared to be intimate again, don't feel good enough. It doesn't help the things I saw in my childhood and abuse which led me to a lot of issues today also with women. I know I sound crazy but I don't know how to get better so I can build some healthy relationships, I'm already very hurt and have a hard time trusting women at all with the way they are in today's society.