Basically as I've gotten older I've gotten kind of resentful towards women and the way they are. When I was 18/19 I just ran through so many because really I was addicted to sex and just used and manipulated girls for sex. I still know how to but I don't want to, I just want a normal good pretty girl, but I have so much experience talking to so many girls I know it's rare.

Now I'm 26, waiter, and haven't been interested in years, I'm attractive and get looks and compliments at work but hate it, and I'm more picky now. Girls at work look at me like a f-boy/manipulative which was true to some extent.

Part of me is embarrassed that I'm not where I want to be and lost in life, financially and overall, but I see other guys worse off dating. Part of me still has issues from growing up in an abusive home, never seen a successful relationship really, and I'm scared Ill get a pretty girl but mess it up like every other time. I want to trust a girl enough to open up and that she isn't with anyone else either.