So, I wanted to share my experience of quitting drinking for a month and the impacts it has had on my life so far.

I woke up just about a month ago with the worst hangover ever. Had no memories of the night before, and when I checked my bank account more than 4 saved up vacations were gone. In this moment of crisis I realised that the only way I could continue to live with myself was if I were able to make something good about this. The solution: Quit drinking, and within a year I would not only have saved up the amount of money I “lost” but also gain better health, confidence, sleep etc etc.

When I started to think about it, I realised that all the biggest mistakes I’ve done in my life was under the influence. I’ve been a “social drinker” all my life, going out on the weekends, but I had a hard time just taking a few bears and often ended up getting shit faced and do stupid shit I regretted the next day. My dad and grandfather were both alcoholics, and I’ve started to think that I might have a high risk for becoming one.

The part I think most people that are thinking about going sober are anxious about is their social life. Meeting women, going out for a beer with the friends, looking awkward without a drink etc etc. However, since I seriously feared for my life, I didn’t see any options.

I’m going to try and keep this sort of short and not make any FRs, but here is my experience of my first (and hopefully not last) month sober.

Upsides:

+ No hangovers. I suddenly have an extra day every week where I’m not laying hangover in bed. That is 52 extra days per year. Think about what you can do with 52 bonus days each year. Read books, work out, work, meditate, meet a friend for a coffe, do day game, learn a new skill etc etc. And waking up without zero regrets and anxiety from the night before is a magical feeling.

+ Health. Not only is alcohol bad for my health, I can now go for a jog on a Sunday instead of puking in the bathroom. And there is no more junk food late at Friday night.

+ Economy. When going out drinking, I could easily spend $100-200 a night. I’ll now put this money into a savings account.

+ Permanent confidence and long term experiences. To be honest, being out sober can be scary sometimes. People are loud, highly energetic and sometimes aggressive. It took a while to get used to, and i’m still not totally comfortable with it, but now I can take that confidence with me in my everyday life.

Before I had two personalities, the everyday life me, and the drunk party me. Actually the majority of the time I could learn and evolve socially, was the time when I was drunk. Try to go to school drunk and see if you learn anything.

Sure, you can all be that cool guy while you are drunk in a bar Saturday night. But the next day you might not even have the balls to look a girl in the eyes.

Now I have started to notice an overall confidence change in everyday life, it’s like the outgoing party persona is starting to merge with the everyday life persona.

+ Meeting women. This is so funny for me. When going out sober there is another presence there. Just the fact that I’m sober makes me feel so fucking cool and confidence, and when I started approaching I got a rush of adrenaline and endorphins that I never felt while drunk. And the best part is that this feeling stays with me (yesterday was the first day when I went out during daytime to approach just because I wanted to and not to “train on approaching” etc.) in my everyday life and it’s not lost the day after.

Blowouts is also so much easier to handle, while drunk I could become very sensitive and make a big deal out of it.

And thanks to the fact that I have more control and focus, I don’t do stupid mistakes while flirting that I did while being drunk. And to be honest, the women that would go home with the drunk me is not the top quality women i’m looking for.

+ Better sex. Damn, having sex sober is in a whole other thing. It was a little bit awkward at first (meeting a girl for the first time) but I have to say it’s a lot better sober. I can really feel all my human sexual emotions and stay hard for longer than 2 minutes. Now it's not just about sticking my penis inside her and cum, I enjoy every part of it. The girls seem to enjoy it more as well.

+ Motivation I feel a stronger motivation to evolve and live my life to the fullest, than in a long time. I’m not sure why, but it is probably a combination of all the topics above. It’s a snowball effect of doing something I have been wanting to do and struggle with for a long time.

Downsides:

- Emotional states. It’s harder to get in a social and energetic mode. Now I need to work for it (warmups etc) and momentum is often lost if I don’t take action. I can easily start to feel tired and bored, and If I don’t do anything to get out of that (read: approaching and being social) it will ruin my night, while before I just had to buy another drink. However, if I do take action sober, I get 10 times the energy from it and I often forget that i’m not drunk.

- People whining about me not drinking. This still bothers me. I had several times having people more or less saying i’m weird for not drinking. And I can understand that. They want everyone else to be drunken fools, and they probably think i’m some sort of psychopath that can be out a Friday night sober. I think the best thing to do is probably to say “nah, I have som really important stuff to take care of tomorrow” or something similar, not saying “yeah I stopped drinking for life because I do fucked up stuff while drunk”. In the end, it’s probably all up to me to not make a big deal out of it.

- It feels weird to not cheer or have a beer in my hand. And that is something I have to live with.. And btw, ordering tonic water or something similar is a great substitute.

- All nights are not automatically fun. This comes back to the first downside. Let’s say we just sit home with the guys drinking, well then it would probably be a lot more fun getting drunk.

- It’s harder to bound with drunk people and I get to see some weird shit. Friends getting drunk and telling secrets, people getting all emotional and shit, that is kind of an awkward experience and I probably need some more time to get used to it.

- Harder to escalate. When I meet a girl that I know are in to me, I have an easier time escalate while drunk. But this is just another thing to get used to, and when I’ve gotten used to escalate sober i’m pretty fucking sure that I will be a lot better at it.

These are the pros and cons I noticed so far from staying sober.

The results with women so far are awesome. I had the some of the best experiences with women in a long time. Not only the ones I actually hooked up with, but just chatting up the cute girl in the coffee shop. I fell in love once, had sober sex with three different girls, and flirted up three more that I hopefully will date in a near future - all while sober and building a long term confidence. Beside that I have had many interesting conversations with people I would totally ignore or just not meet while running around drunk in a nightclub.

I think a big different is simply the fact that I can experience these encounters to the fullest, and still remember everything about them the next day.

It actually feels great to just write about this here, and I will fight for it to be a permanent change in my life.

If someone that are thinking about going sober wants any support, or you just wants to ask any questions - please feel free to.