There is a misconception in the pickup artist community that neediness is always bad and counterproductive.

We all have needs and seek to fulfill them. Before, you might have attemped to fulfill them in a destructive manner, which usually describes what we coin as "needy" and dependence.

From that hurt, where you were dependent on others to fulfill your needs, you have became wildly independent which resembles something similar to the "independent woman", "I dont need a man" mindset.

Just look at these "I dont need a man" women. Can they ever have a long term, stable and fulfilling relationship? They are usually intolerable!

They are so focused on being independent, refusing help and perceiving legitimate needs of their partner as "needy" and then enforcing "boundaries" so that they can refuse interdependence that they defeat themselves within a relationship.

Interdependence is the nature of this life. Without everything else you cease to exist. And without you, everything else might cease to exist too. We are all in a state of equilibrium.

Revealing and trusting our partners to meet and fulfill our needs is deeply vulnerable. When we reveal our true needs and TRUE emotions, people may downplay, dismiss or ignore them. Which hurts us.

But hurt is not a reason to close yourself from the world. By accepting interdependence, meeting the needs of others AND accepting that others can fulfill your needs, we can exist harmoniously in the world.

To become a person larger than yourself, who can occassionally put someone else as more important than yourself is true genuine moments of love. I am sure that you have experiemced this.

It is time for you to put your ego aside, and allow others to experience the full magnitude of your authenticity.

A masculine man is measured by how vulnerable he is in the world, without collapsing into hatred, loneliness and bitterness.

Excercise:

  1. Tell someone how you REALLY feel and why? It is okay to cry to the other person.

  2. Expose honestly and frankly what you need from your partner. Allow rejection to happen.

  3. Listening to another person is to explore their truth. When we explore what is true for them, we can better listen and help others feel understood.

Cheers,

FriendlyWrenChilling.