Not improved over 4 years period

james-robertson · 2018-05-02T00:30:09+00:00

Have you got a plan? You say you haven't got the lifestyle you want, but do you know what it is, exactly? How you need to get there? The difference between where you're at now and where you want to be?

Can you break the journey up into steps? Can you break each step up even smaller, so it's so easy anyone could do it?

Can you put these tiny steps into a weekly / monthly schedule?

hunterpua · 2018-05-02T14:17:07+00:00

Definitely relate.

What you have to do is create a new social circle. You can no longer rely on old friends to be there because as you said they've moved to new cities or their jobs keep them away from you.

Now joining a new social circle is not the same as making your own. You probably have a little social circle going on with your co-workers right now. The thing is, if you want to do anything with that or add someone to it, you'll need their approval. With your own social circle, you don't need to worry about any of that, you can do whatever the hell you want.

The easiest way to do it is just to have a regular thing you do once a week. It can be as simple as going to a restaurant every week or a bar every week. Just invite every person you meet to that and have them bring friends. From there its easy to refine it and choose the kind of people you want to hang out with, just stop inviting the ones you don't particularly like and keep inviting the ones you do.

The thing with a social circles is you don't just get together for no reason. There has to be a reason for you guys to hang out. So once you have your little weekly thing going identify something you guys all like doing together. Maybe you guys have the same hobbies or you like certain kinds of movies or music. Create something that you guys can do together. My current social circle likes going on trips together so now there is a point to our weekly meetups, we're there to talk about where we want to travel to next.

If you have a medium that allows you to see everyone regularly and there is a reason for all of you to be together plus its yours and you get to call the shots, you'll find yourself living your ideal lifestyle in no time.

olpdragon · 2018-05-02T09:08:07+00:00

You need to be more specific on your last four years. What have you tried to improve, what have you been doing to improve, what experiences you've had and what those were like.

Were you actively trying to get experience and going out and trying things (in a sense, practicing)?

So yea, the real world is tough. It is only as tough as you let it + also just really tough in general depending on you are in life/what situation you are currently in. Regardless, if you want something, you know how to get it, you knowbhow to get better and eventually get it. Things are harder now, harder to meet people, not enough time in the day anymore,... But regardless, those are just obstacles you can and must learn to maneuver around. A lot of people your age are still managing, a lot of people 10-20 years older are managing to do this.

Also what you said about your friends is the same for a lot of other people your age (getting married, are in demanding jobs), but there are also peopl in your shoes too that are not with their buddies anymore but still out looking for girls or guys.

You didn't explain enough essential info, but what seems to be crucial is that you have an idea of how to reach your goals, and that you apply them... and fail, over and over again, practice, till you get it right sometimes, until you get it right everytime. It is never too late. As long as you never give up, you know what to do/ know how to learn what to do.

Don't think too much about what you cant do or how hard things are, dont think about the negatives. Think sbout the positives and what you want. Go for what you want, and keep that in your mind at all times.

Also what jamesroberts said with his comment is very very important and very applicable to nearly all aspects of life.

LingeringGnome · 2018-05-02T20:05:09+00:00

Hit the gym, put this negative energy into motion.

Title	Not improved over 4 years period
Author	milikan2
Upvotes	2
Comments	10
Date	May 2, 2018 12:12 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/8gd6ei/not_improved_over_4_years_period/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/not-improved-over-4-years-period.1445857 https://theredarchive.com/post/1445857

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