On awkward silences

Solacee · 2012-11-15T23:23:17+00:00

Awkward silences are usually not as awkward as your mind is playing then up to be. Honestly, silences between two people after a really good conversation with laughter adds sexual tension. This works especially so if you're in the girl's place and during your silence you maintain eye contact while thinking of fucking the shit out of her.

Silence, and thinking confidently about a silence helps you establish a sexual frame with women you're trying to get with. It's really obvious to everybody, especially the girl when you try to quickly fill in silences, and it conveys shyness or nervousness which lower your value

ARealSocialIdiot · 2012-11-16T02:30:49+00:00

The reason you feel that silences are awkward is because you're spending them trying to come up with something to say—and the longer you go without being able to find something to say, the more scared you feel that you're fucking the interaction up.

If, instead, you don't care about the silence and you just... let it go on, you may find that it does some really interesting things with the sexual tension in the air. And if you're talking with a girl, it's kinda funny how if you just don't open your mouth, she'll just continue talking and talking and talking so that there isn't as much of that silence. You'll end up looking like a guy who listens AND she'll feel that you're more aloof—both good traits.

kingcal · 2012-11-16T04:03:51+00:00

If there's a pause, just look into her eyes and don't break the gaze. Huge sexual tension.

iwenttocharlenes · 2012-11-16T04:37:41+00:00

A lot of good contributions on this topic. I'd like to add this: often times, we're so wrapped up in worrying about what other people think about us that we forget most people are busy worrying about what everyone else thinks of them. If you have already been talking to a girl for a little bit and she didn't hate it, ceasing to talk will usually get her to try and fill in the gaps. If you assume you have to fill them in, you demonstrate lower value by needing to "entertain" the girl. If you don't, you demonstrate higher value by showing you aren't phased by the silence, and she will usually try to qualify herself to you by filling in all the silences in lieu of you.

2012-11-16T14:51:34+00:00

Just one thing about silence, DON'T LAUGH. Some people try to do this, whether consciously or unconsciously, to make it comfortable again. All this does is make you look like you want their approval, and of course, for the sake of looking alpha, this is a no-no.

TAOofSTEVE · 2012-11-15T23:23:25+00:00

Silence is only awkward if you make it awkward. If you are confident in yourself, you don't care if there is a silence. No need to panic to fill that void. You are comfortable enough to let the silence linger. If you panic, she'll sense your discomfort and it will make her uncomfortable. Now you are both uncomfortable. Bad shit. Instead, go with it, give he a knowing smirk, and reengage conversation gracefully.

pickup_sticks · 2012-11-15T23:40:45+00:00

As others have said, it's only awkward if you decide it's awkward.

Try this: when a silence comes up, make eye contact and hold it. (This will be scary at first, takes practice.) Keep holding it until she either looks away, says something, or you genuinely think of something you want to say or ask -- not because you feel the need to fill the silence, but because it's what you're thinking.

Also, sometimes the best thing to do is to either lean in and kiss her or tell her "I love your eyes."

It took me a while to get good at this, and I still get a little anxious, so don't worry if it feels strange at first.

BRENDORVEGAS · 2012-11-16T16:12:03+00:00

add a laugh track....works all the time

ThaDonKilluminati · 2012-11-17T03:12:24+00:00

This thread is great, alot of good advice in here. Awkward silences have always been a problem for me since I'm generally not a talker. So I now know how to deal with them :D

Title	On awkward silences
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	27
Comments	11
Date	November 15, 2012 11:01 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/139l7o/on_awkward_silences/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/on-awkward-silences.1342797 https://theredarchive.com/post/1342797

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