Rapport-seeking and mirroring -- Starting conversations

Karma_Be_Damned · 2011-05-02T22:10:46+00:00

psychological space

I think this is the answer your looking for as far as your question. Giving her some space to maneuver freely before committing to a conversation. I suppose you can be committed from the get go to maintain domincance or be charming or whatever floats your fucking boat.

I would consider a person's expectations of you in the circumstance. For instance, the old lady walking down the street who makes eye contact prolly doesn't expect anything beyond a friendly "hello." and anything more without pretext can throw off her groove. Meanwhile the cutey at the bar who makes eye contact from under her bangs expects a little bit more from you.

Never ignore the fact that just like you're experiencing a unique world through your frame so is everybody else you'll ever see. Breaking the old ladies world of a nice relaxing walk with all this pressure to talk to a high value male who's positioned for a solid social interaction is a bit sudden. Just like you experienced, I'd figure breaking into it with non-committed small talk would be your smoothest open. An open is really a transition from seperate frames into your leadership. The smoother you can make that transition the better it'll end for you.

Anyway man I've never considered or read anything to this effect before, I usually open however feels natural and I stand by that as a general rule but when you pick up on stuff like this it's always a good idea to explore it thoroughly. The shit you figure out on your own is what really sets you apart from other pickup artists. Personal reflection is the biggest tool you have to further yourself since it's an individual's experience.

porphyry3 · 2011-05-02T19:43:52+00:00

Instead, this time I'd maintain neutral posture, give a medium amount of eye contact.

I tend to prefer this kind of posture too. Especially when in line or at the train station.

chumpta · 2011-05-03T03:32:58+00:00

My question is, how does this relate to picking up women? The indirect camp would say, "Good! Open sideways, then slowly face her." The direct camp (Juggler comes to mind) says, "You have to fully invest in the conversation first. Face her directly from the get-go."

My instinct tells me that these approaches might both be good, depending on the situation. Thoughts?

don't know why the "camps" are considered separate - you are correct in intuiting that the approach's effectiveness lies in the situation you're using it in.

direct seems to work best when she's already given you an "approach invitation," or the situation is otherwise sexually charged. indirect works for most other situations.

regardless of that, i still don't think "facing a girl" is a good way to start - mystery used to advise not to do that, not because it was too direct, but because it seems incredibly uncalibrated and almost threatening (in a physical way, not a sexual one).

ilurkokcupid · 2011-05-03T05:20:27+00:00

What exactly is a neutral posture?

Nexism · 2011-05-04T03:01:11+00:00

Do realise Mystery Method was explicitly for picking up 9 and above.

Title	Rapport-seeking and mirroring -- Starting conversations
Author	leftajar
Upvotes	12
Comments	6
Date	May 2, 2011 6:48 PM UTC (15 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/h2gq8/rapportseeking_and_mirroring_starting/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/rapport-seeking-and-mirroring-starting.1293886 https://theredarchive.com/post/1293886

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