Ho boy. Alright.

Pissed off, I went walking after my fiasco at the party (it's a carnival festivity, actually). Went to the store and spotted a girl. Actually cute. Felt like my heart skipped a beat. Too afraid to approach of course. BUT. I had an idea. Asked her where could I find mineral water. Thanked her and went. "Found" her choosing a can of energy drink. Told her it would be better if she picked another (said I knew it tasted better, lmao). Saw her again. She actually picked it.

Holy. Shit.

Being a dumbass I interpreted it wrongly. Asked her to grab a coffe. Said she had a bf. Fucked off.

Having enouf, I tool a sip of beer to go Dutch mode and returned. Not much luck. Asked a random girl. Got rejected. There was this girl dressed in a toga. Chickened out but thought of a line ("hey goddes, this mortal would like to treat you with a drink", fking lmao)

So yeah... 4 down... 4 million to go. I keep wondering if the results would have been different if I was fit and other stuff. Somehow, I think I don't want to know for the fear of turning back to my jaded self. Believe me when I say how dangerous it is, because it actually came up with an unbelievable logic that made me cockblock myself for years.

Sigh. I just wish I wasn't so lonely all the time. To quote A. Ryan : "in what country there is a place for people like me?".