I know it could be 'fun' or intellectually stimulating to try to figure out WHY something happens. But one huge change I made in my life which increased my success with women (and success in life in general) was making a huge shift in my mentality of approaching problems. Instead of asking WHY the problem exists, I started focusing on asking HOW can I fix the problem. True, sometimes they are intertwined and knowing why helps answers how, BUT, the mindset change is hugely beneficial to self improvement. At least it was for me. Start by asking HOW first.