Text Game... Where did i go wrong here?

YeOldeThrowaway · 2011-03-19T01:35:55+00:00

Dominant, the word is dominant. And alot is not a word. And, and... ah, nevermind. I wouldn't say anything, but if you're going to run text game you could try and be literate. You'd be surprised how many girls complain about guys that can't speak coherently.

/Sorry, couldn't help myself. Going back to cave now

scrubzor · 2011-03-18T23:42:55+00:00

I have found its always best to call to ask someone out for a date. Calling her displays more confidence. Plus when you call, you dont have a chance to overanalyze what you are going to say. The conversation can be much more natural.

I dont think making it a command that she has to come out with you worked in your favor. Probably should have phrased the question in a more open ended manner.

I find it works best when asking a girl out for the first time, to: -always have a specific event in mind that you want to invite her to. (not a surprise) -This event should be something that you are going to continue to do if she says no.

Something akin to: "I'm meeting up for drinks with some friends at bar XYZ on saturday night, I'm trying to round up some more people to join the fun, do you want to come along?" You want to make the first date something casual. Position your first date as such: You are already a cool active guy who has exciting things going on in your life (insert event here), and you are merely asking if she wants to join in. It's a casual, no pressure invitation that lets her decide without crushing your feelings if she says no. It displays confidence that you were able to call her casually and ask her out, without coming across as over-eager.

If you don't want to ask indirectly, you can do it directly too. Coffee, Drinks, lunch, something low-key and informal. not lasting more than like an hour or two.

I would say its important to note that if she is really into you, it won't matter how you ask or what you are doing. Her decision to go out with you is about much more than how you asked her out, its about your entire interactions as a whole. If she is strongly attracted to you, she would have been waiting for your phone call the instant you asked for her number.

throwawaysedditor183 · 2011-03-18T23:41:04+00:00

The first thing that comes to mind, is how spaced where your responses, because that is what most sedditors will ask first.

As for me, the last text msg came off as a bit controlling to me, "na thats not how it works haha we are hangin out this saturday, its going to be a blast :)", but thats just me. My response to when she said "haha i'll try to ;)" I would've been like; "I'll call you the day off with details, or something like that.

Also you could just be over-thinking things, and that she is busy with schoolwork as it does happen sometime.

Then again, I could be completely wrong.

gpua · 2011-03-19T01:08:58+00:00

The "Yeah we are" text was unnecessary, you were just repeating her. I like to keep texting to a minimum, so I personally would have ended it after her response or just added something playful/teasing.

Did she reply between that message and the "I'm thinking about gettin somethin to eat..." text? If not, you shouldn't have sent that. I never send two texts in a row. It made you come off as desperate/needy. Wait for her to reply, or wait a day or two.

Once again, I would have ended it after she sent, "Haha I'll try to ;)". Your response comes off as too forceful/controlling to me.

After that, it was good to assume that she meant yes, but I would have just told her to bring the camera without asking about it.

Generally, you want to keep texting to a minimum. Just get the key points across while keeping it fun/playful. As others have said, you usually would want to call her for the first date. Also, wait a while between her texts and your replies. Five minutes at least.

One more thing: If you've been talking with her for eight weeks, she may have tagged you as just a friend. You'll want to to set the tone of the date early to make sure she gets the point.

calisurfer1 · 2011-03-19T18:24:29+00:00

Read the texting guidlines in the faq. I think what helped me the most is the spacing out of texts. I wait a really long time before texting back generally. The only exception is sometimes when a girl instantly texts me back I won't wait as long. This works really well for a bunch of reasons like, you know that feeling you get when a girl waits to text you back for a while but it turns out shes just showering or something? ya girls feel that too. Plus its a lot easier not to overtext.

Title	Text Game... Where did i go wrong here?
Author	calisurfer1
Upvotes	5
Comments	11
Date	March 18, 2011 10:18 PM UTC (15 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/g6qe3/text_game_where_did_i_go_wrong_here/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/text-game-where-did-i-go-wrong-here.1316504 https://theredarchive.com/post/1316504

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