I go on here occasionally. Basically, I do think there are lots of ways that society is unfair to men on average, and there's a lot of work to do. It's a great thing to talk about!

One of those things is abuse – for example, this was the discussion on Youtuber Matthew Santoro talking about his alleged experiences of abuse. I thought it was a really touching thing, and great to bring attention to a topic that often gets overlooked. The comments on here were generally supportive, as they should be, even though Santoro was making his accusations without any real proof.

Which brings me to my point. There's a certain musician, Ke$ha, who has alleged a similar history of abuse, and has taken her alleged abuser to court to try and annul the contract between them. She has a similar level of evidence to Santoro. Based on that evidence, there's not really any way for us to say with certainty that either of them are either telling the truth or lying.

And yet I can't get through a thread on here without reading people demanding that she be prosecuted, criticising the "Ah the "break-down in tears" defence, incredibly effective", saying "So, one way or another, she's a lying piece of shit.", calling it a "Another mother daughter scam". And no-one challenges it! It just gets upvoted!

Why do certain users think it's ok to say this shit about her, when it wasn't ok to say it about Santoro for making public accusations? If he had taken his girlfriend to court, for example in order to get out of a rental contract, would you be calling him a liar? What if he'd told people during the relationship that she wasn't abusing him? Would that make him a lying piece of shit?

Personally? It's fine to be sceptical. It's fine to say that you don't know, and to have some sympathy with both parties. But "innocent until proven guilty" really should apply both to the accused and to the accuser – if you think it's wrong for some feminists to call Dr Luke a rapist, isn't it wrong to call Ke$ha a liar? And yet I almost never see this kind of bile being challenged on here. I think this kind of hypocrisy by certain users ultimately undermines the cause, just like hypocrisy among some feminists ultimately undermines their movement.