Why the hell men can't cry?

wrathFulll · 2021-11-24T07:42:24+00:00

Tears solved no issues.

Women and others don't respect you if you do. You've seen the other comments.

I'd cry. But that would require having some worth trusting..which doesn't seem very likely...

TakuTofu · 2021-11-24T07:09:13+00:00

you say this but it's been proven time and again that women lose respect towards a man who outwardsly shows emotions and see him as less sexually and romantically viable even if they previously said that they want men to be more emotional , women tend to punish men for showing emotions just as much as other men if not more

MiKEY_SANZ · 2021-11-24T05:11:33+00:00

Do you really love it when a boy is open about his feelings? Or do you just think you would be when you picture yourself with your future dream man?

Not trying to be a jerk, it’s a serious question meant to stir thought and self reflection. I’m not trying to be combative.

SolarEngine89 · 2021-11-24T08:46:48+00:00

Ugh. That topic.

Shaming anybody for showing emotions in a way, that do not harm others is shit.
But why we are so obsessed with crying guys? Is there really so much shit in everyday everybody's life to sit and sob every evening? There are more urgent problems to solve. Legal system, parenting rights, financial abortion, prostate cancer, retirement age, mental health etc etc. You name it.
Why da fuck people think, that everybody shows emotions in a same way? Crying is mostly woman's way to show sadness. (An evolutionary developed request for help, by the way)

Men have different emotional patterns. We more often feel anger, that scare in dangerous situations, according to several studies. Also lads tend less to be worried, than ladies,on average. Wich is perfectly logical due to guys being more physically equipped to fend off dangers, than girls, who,lacking physical power, are more dependant on others.

Yes, that is a stone age logics, but our psyche was formed this way in that times, and evolution does not give a fuck about our modern stage of affairs. Deal with it.

According to both studies and my own life experience, mothers are the ones, whopst ofen tell boys not to cry. So, that's not men's issue per se. That is an issue with a middle class widespreaded toxic feminity. Ladies should get their shit together and stop traumatizing boys finally.

Kindly-Town · 2021-11-24T06:49:21+00:00

Men who express their emotions and vulnerabilities face problems in dating success so they keep it to themselves and to their closest male friend. This is called damage control.

EMPIREVSREBLES · 2021-11-24T17:25:27+00:00

Even worse, those that blame toxic masculinity for men not showing emotions and usually the ones who tell men to "shut up and man up" and "women/people aren't your emotional support dog" when men try showing emotions.

Glomb175 · 2021-11-24T17:27:26+00:00

I'm a man who doesn't cry, but every now and then I have a mini breakdown where I cry uncontrollably, maybe once a year.

I spent a few months seeing a therapist but couldn't break through this wall. We think it's to do with me losing my parents at a young age and being the only man in the family and a subconscious need to be the big strong man.

It's not healthy, and it really sucks. I feel emotionally stunted.

Ok_Research219 · 2021-11-24T05:09:53+00:00

The reason why men don’t cry is because at that point a man was vulnerable to anyone that was a witness to it. Sometimes a man, but usually a woman, that moment is used to emasculate him. Which is why now men for the most part can be perceived as callous, stoic and cold. When they don’t react to anything.

Jolt_Ready_95 · 2021-11-25T13:34:13+00:00

That's how the stupid society is. How the heck can anyone shame or judge someone by the way their emotions are? If someone cries, that's because they are sad. It's as trivial as when someone smiles, that's because they are happy. It's completely your and your emotions' choice how you want to express yourself, not anyone else's. How can people be immature enough not to understand such a simple thing? I am happy that I knew this before any poking nose judged me. I don't care how they perceive me if I express myself, why the heck do I deserve the appreciation of anyone whose role is just a guest role in my life? I love myself so I live myself.

Lasttoflinch · 2021-11-24T09:44:10+00:00

Not in any way knowledgeable in this but sociocultural conditioning and expectations aside, men may be, on average, biologically less inclined to express emotions outwardly, particularly manifestations of emotion that suggest weakness, vulnerability and incompetence. (please correct me if I'm wrong)

I don't like the idea (specifically how it's put across) that men (and boys) should cry, or they should be encouraged to cry. Nobody should be actively encouraged to cry. Rather, we should tell individuals (be it males or females) that it's ok to cry, that crying is a natural coping mechanism, and that we should not recklessly ridicule or belittle individuals (especially males) that cry.

HumbleGaijin · 2021-11-24T13:32:00+00:00

Weakness. A traditional idea of men is that any emotion is weakness; anger, sadness, even joy. All of these things can be used against us as a sick, perverted 'power play'.

And while previous generations had an unspoken agreement about spouses/partners not sharing any emotions shared in private to the outside world, the ideals and times have changed with an unfortunate victim of that being a portion (not all) of younger generations being loose-lipped and oversharing, particularly on social media or when alcohol is flowing.

On a different note, I am sorry that your parents put that notion into your head. It isn't healthy and I hope that you feel better.

MysticQueen2004 · 2021-11-24T17:25:10+00:00

As a woman who has many male friends, toxic masculinity is real and it affects all men to a great extent. It’s hard to communicate with my friends sometimes or have deep conversations. But when we do it’s always very emotional because they tell me that they don’t have conversations like that often. Let boys show emotion. They are humans.

FakeLaundry · 2021-11-24T19:14:57+00:00

Most men emote differently than women and always will because women are usually not attracted to openly emotional men. They have gotten mostly bred out.

DeathBingerover_9000 · 2021-11-27T04:19:19+00:00

Do you participate in any feminist subreddit's?

waltuhwhite88 · 2023-04-03T00:32:50+00:00

John 11 35 "jesus wept."

Title	Why the hell men can't cry?
Author	Memona_Emman_Writes
Upvotes	36
Comments	47
Date	November 23, 2021 6:51 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/r0k832/why_the_hell_men_cant_cry/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/why-the-hell-men-cant-cry.1086941 https://theredarchive.com/post/1086941

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