Nothing huge here. Just wanted to quickly mention an encounter with group of friends I hadn't seen in 6 years.

I was hesitant to go. It had been a long time, and the invite was last minute and out of the blue. I figured I should. I was feeling fear and anxiety, so it was a queue for me to challenge myself.

They are all still friends. But on arrival I was well received. It was fun. I was careful and played it safe.

As the evening progressed, we went inside and the group dynamic had settled into its normal hierarchy. It was the same pecking order I had always known, between the same players. 7 of us in the room.

At first, I was being given extra notice and consideration. These were always half decent guys. I imagined it was simply them giving me special due, since I'd been away from the click for so long. But then I realized the humor was aggressive and boysterous as it had ever been. As the focus continued toward me, I started over thinking it. Doubt started to creep in. Where they laughing with me or at me?

Then, a moment cut through the collective banter. I was having a direct discussion with the main guy of the group. The alpha. He is a good guy, but pulls no punches and is intelligent. As we start talking real shit with humor in between, I notice everyone give us room. After a couple clever jokes on his part, that rolled off something I had said earlier with the group, I realized his posture was mirroring mine. I wasn't sure who had started sitting that way first so I changed it up. Sure enough, a few breaths in, I see him mirror the change.

Now I'm not looking to dominate and bite into his neck, making the pack fall to my will. What it did do though, was reassure me and sooth my anxiety. I was able to let go and loosen up.

A confidence builder, to say the least. From there I pushed my humor and even tripped up a couple times, but I gave no fucks and was able recover quickly, own it in a way which rolled everyone to laugh harder than the initial joke ever could have done.

Shaking hands on my way out was very gratifying. Each held out their hand waiting for me to offer mine. One guy had a weak grab (he always did). So I imposed myself, by adjusting his hand into mine properly, and when he met my eyes his grip hardened as his face lit up. So I patted him on the shoulder. It felt awesome.

The Alpha waited last outside, lighting a smoke as I came out, and he made way toward his car. His motions were smooth, and I was impressed at how, without a word, he made it so inviting for me to follow. We yapped some closing lines, and he shook my hand halfway between our two vehicles. It was a good grip and he patted me on my shoulder. I smiled for more than one reason.

Lots of blah blah here, but it was remarkable how in the moment and how lucid I was. How I picked up on the non verbal queues. The growth I've made in the last year was made apparent by this little visit. And it had fuck all to do with women.

TRP is not just about women.

Edit: flare has been added.