Annoying wingman advice needed

senator_mendoza · 2016-02-05T15:34:17+00:00

1) be thankful that you have a fun high-energy friend to roll with. that's really not a bad starting point, you just need to dial it in.

2) when he starts doing the braggy thing then call him out on it in a funny and lighthearted way and then MOVE ON. so if i was like "yo i'll make you dinner" and he did his bit with the "carbonara italy blah blah blah" i'd just be like "don't worry - he brags a lot but it's just cuz he likes you, he'll cool down a little bit once we get to know eachother" or "just so you know, he's the best at everything. EVERYTHING! haha but seriously - let's catch up in a few hours. lemme get your number" or "whoa whoa ok they asked about dinner, not your life story - but seriously his carbonara's LEGIT! let's hang and eat pasta and drink wine later"

so basically just play off him and establish a fun dynamic. you'll be having fun joking around with him, the girls will be having fun with the high energy, it's all good

Woujo · 2016-02-05T15:18:27+00:00

You can't fix people. People's personalities are pretty ingrained. The only thing you can do is to get tough on him if he does anything to actually hurt you (for example, cockblocks you or just to take a girl for himself that you were talking to).

That said, I don't see what the problem is. Let him talk. If he is making an ass of himself the girls will naturally gravitate towards you because you're being more chill. And if the girls like that, well, that's good, right?

GreekLobsta · 2016-02-05T15:18:28+00:00

I have two friends who are both like this, one is a drug dealer and big into the hippy scene, the other is in college and works for the city and plans a lot of events at local venues. They both just tell their own story and bounce their conversations and talk over each other, but it's mostly amusing anecdotes so everyone's laughing. They frequently hit on the same girl (s) at the same time. I think he expects you to be like him. Match his big personality, or use it in some other way to your advantage.

If you have such differing personalities just take that to the extreme and walk away from him, you might do better alone. You can both be in the same place but doing different things with different people. Don't live in his shadow, cast your own.

totallynevi · 2016-02-05T16:41:21+00:00

Well, you should either tell your friend how you feel and ask him not to cockblock you like that or try to stir the conversation more towards the girls, as in ask questions about them. People love to talk about themselves(as you already noticed lol) and it's easy to establish connection simply by asking questions.

Speaking with your friend is not a bad idea too. If he's a truly good friend of yours, he will consider your concerns and perhaps next time try to include you into conversation or redeem himself other way.

My best friend once told me such thing too, he was like "yo, you push me away from the spotlight when we're around new people too much, it kinda sucks you know." and I took it into consideration, since I don't consider myself as above or below him but as equals, thus I'm trying to not to conquer all attention.

I've been on the other end too and I know how much it sucks to be in that place. Feels like it doesn't even matter if you're there with them or not.

rAlexanderAcosta · 2016-02-05T21:55:02+00:00

You gotta remind him that you guys gotta work as a team. If you guys can vibe and build off of each other, you're more likely to get laid. One upping, if the girl is observant, will lead to rejection because she'll see the douchiness.

Another option, as others have said, is to tailor your actions to his so that way you start giving at his level. If he finds it easy to tell grand stories, add on to it, build on it and you'll both appear as bad ass mofos.

DaygameCoach · 2016-02-05T22:39:29+00:00

If he doesn't understand, and as a natural he might not (he is doing what naturally works for him), then go out and game without him. You can still hangout with him, but don't rely on being with him to get women.

Or...get your game up to his level. You ARE supposed to be talking a lot...and if you were, you two could vibe off each other.

dauhhh · 2016-02-05T14:24:40+00:00

Get some cooler stories lol

TheSevenKhumquats · 2016-02-05T15:38:41+00:00

Look for a space in his conversation, and ask the girls some question.

DarkestPunisher · 2016-02-05T14:23:39+00:00

You're saying he is annoying because essentially you are jealous of his success and seeming more attractive and interesting to your targets am I right? Don't be ashamed this is normal and first you need to admit this to yourself and then let go.

If he really is your friend then talk to him. Tell him how good he is doing but be honest and tell him you feel he is taking too much of the spotlight and you would like him to gear down.

Another option is "outcooling" him but from what you tell me this won't work. You seem frustrated about him and this will show. If he really is annoying he will annoy the targets as well but the question is and you need to ask yourself this.

Is HE annoying or is the success he is having annoying you?

Tamazin_ · 2016-02-05T15:00:57+00:00

id' respond with his own medicine, every time he said something cool about himself id' one-up him every single time, with lies and whatnot (and if he later say "but thats lying" just play it cool with "Ah but they don't know that!") untill he can't take it anymore and then spill the beans that THAT is exactly what he has done all the bloody time towards you.

Title	Annoying wingman advice needed
Author	CNeudert
Upvotes	15
Comments	13
Date	February 5, 2016 1:34 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/44atwp/annoying_wingman_advice_needed/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/annoying-wingman-advice-needed.1401873 https://theredarchive.com/post/1401873

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