Should extreme hard-cases try?

geeered · 2018-12-01T10:23:22+00:00

There are absolutely loads of guys like you.

Also some girls - though overall girls are more likely to have an easier time if they have fairly low standards.

Do you have a physical disability that prevents you working out?

Do that if not.

A "thin" build can still put plenty of muscle on. Try 'starting strength' or 'Stronglifts'

You may find a local running club or similar is a great way to meet women that also don't consider themselves desirable.

Most women can get any guys they want if they have pretty low standards.

If you read a lot of 'guides' for pickup etc, you'll see it's a numbers games.

Quite likely the people really good at it would have the same results as you if they approached the same numbers of girls as you - but they'll go out and talk to 50 girls in one night.

And have done that regularly.

It seems you're continually looking for reasons not to act.

Some advice I should take myself - turn that around. Use those same reasons to act.

Go to a club in another town, or even just out in the day when people are Christmas shopping.

Pre-prepare some 'openers' that you are confident in using.

You've told yourself 80/20, you won't have a chance, etc, etc - so now you know none of this matters, this women aren't interested in you anyway :).

So it doesn't matter if you make a fool of yourself, they're just people that you'd never have met and will never meet again.

Talk to 100 women using your pre-canned openers (maybe asking a question... to really reduce your social anxiety, could even be for directions - but then try and get a little conversation "do you know how to get to 'X'?"... "Oh thanks, I'm just here for the day, can you recommend anywhere good to get a drink later?"

It's not a magic bullet, but it's a small step in the right direction.

Generally - you have it together enough to write eloquently about your problems - so use those same skills to build yourself a future for your career and hobbies too.

If you read the stories of a lot of really successful 'PUA's, they often aren't too far off your own - the guy that's "okay" at finding girls probably finds one and settles down. It's often those of us, many possibly a bit further along the spectrum, who are getting frustrated we're not getting a piece of the action, that end up looking up places like this to intentionally get better at it.

NoPassengers · 2018-12-01T11:06:21+00:00

Not one thing you mentioned in that torrent of self-criticism is beyond improvement. What’s actually holding you back is this self-limiting bullshit like “I can’t get in shape realistically”. If you’re going to go around saying you’re hopeless you have to prove it. Hit the gym, eat right, dress your best, start putting yourself in incrementally more challenging social situations and, even when they don’t go well, give yourself credit for the attempt. Failure isn’t shameful; not trying is. Really actually intentionally try for just a few months and if you can come back and tell me you didn’t see any results at all, I’ll entertain this nonsense that you’re hopeless.

Hopelessness is comfortable because it means you don’t have to try. The only other comfortable place is Success. Everything between the two camps is a violent storm of discomfort and embarrassment and setbacks and failures. Some lucky people have the best ships and some lucky people get tailwinds all the way across. It doesn’t matter. You either choose to brave the storm with what you’ve got or you choose to stay at home but either way you have to live with the fact that it was always your decision.

zamdev666 · 2018-12-01T11:07:36+00:00

If you think you have no future, it will become true.

Take small steps and become better man - woman will follow!

curca · 2018-12-01T11:32:04+00:00

Think about your situation in terms of Pascal's Wager, but substitute the existence of god with your potential ability to get a women. If you don't bet on the possibility of becoming an attractive man, you have absolutely no chance of getting to that point. Also I recommend fucking a couple of hookers.

__Rhand__ · 2018-12-03T10:43:47+00:00

I don’t know much about this “pickup” stuff, but I do have extremely shy friends who were older (former) virgins. They went to Southeast Asia and fixed the matter, so to speak.

The jury is still out on what the sequelae of their dirty deeds will be, but they seem happier and more confident.

My two cents.

Title	Should extreme hard-cases try?
Author	Aeon199
Upvotes	0
Comments	18
Date	December 1, 2018 10:03 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/a21w93/should_extreme_hardcases_try/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/should-extreme-hard-cases-try.1457775 https://theredarchive.com/post/1457775

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