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[–]cheddarchexmix 3 points4 points5 points 15 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Upvote for including a photo, something that is very rare around here. Now just prepare for the deluge of "hahaha you think THAT's a 7.5? Bwahahaha!" comments :)
[–]MothershipConnection 2 points3 points4 points 15 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Hey man, not a keyboard jockey here! I do suppose that I end up at a decent amount of parties with cameras around.
I really do think about 80% of the posts here would be better learned if people just interacted more with real people in real life though.
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 15 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Well said. Most people want to pretend to know about pickup, yet somehow they don't realize that the central tenement of pickup is that you learn NOTHING except through first-hand experience in the field.
Just because you think you know what to say doesn't mean you'll say it when the time comes, and just because you know words like "neg" and "kino" doesn't mean you actually apply them in your game.
If only we could get more actual FRs like this one instead of the "how can i get this girl i hardly know to love me, should i ask her to be my girlfriend" submissions that seem to pop up every third post.
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 15 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I would be more than happy to include photos of everyone involved, but there is always the issue of privacy and anonymity. I'm very happy to see others' photos but even a small risk of being labelled as an internet stalker creep is not something I'm comfortable with.
[–]executex 0 points1 point2 points 15 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Actually that girl is exactly a 7 or 7.5, pretty accurate scaling there hehe. If she had a tan, better physique, and better hair, she could possibly even pass for a model.
AA does suck indeed. Somehow you gotta get past it mentally and just go for it. That's what the 3-second rule is about. Once you pass it, and just approach sometimes it turns out it's easy and you feel good again. Of course the opposite situation where you crash and burn can really put a dent in self esteem too.
[–]chumpta 2 points3 points4 points 15 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
ay yes, well there's really nothing you can do about it, it's in the past. the only way to get over AA is to live with it - you can't ever really get rid of it. You have to feel the fear and push through it, almost enjoy it. like a rollercoaster or something.
I catch a cute brunette HB7.5 giving me the eye and she brushes by me on the way to the bar.
sometimes the more obvious they are the more AA you can get. dunno why really but this has happened to me before. I remember one time i was ending a bad night and all my friends were gone and I was just sitting at the bar angry drinking. as i was leaving a hot girl actually put her hand on my arm to stop me, and i just walked through it. it was AA and i was mad too, but this kind of shit happens.
also that girl is def a 7.5
sometimes the more obvious they are the more AA you can get.
My guess is because we feel like we can screw up an easy situation and there's nobody to blame but ourselves. With a typical approach, you can write off a rejection as something wrong with the girl.
[–]MothershipConnection 1 point2 points3 points 15 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Not sweating it at all. It was just a near immediate "HERP DERP why did I just do that?" about 5 minutes later. Just next time I go out, I'll try to keep a much more positive mindset and not worry about whatever's been stressing me out all week. It's been sorta that way for a few weeks though, I could really use more time locked away doing things I really love (locked myself away working on music at home the last two nights, that's a start) or taking a real break (vacation on the way). Cause work sucks, I know.
Damn shame, that girl was really my type, physically, at least. Suppose it doesn't really matter though, I meet plenty of attractive girls.
[–]reph 0 points1 point2 points 15 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Dude, don't burn out from work, trust me, it sucks and it's really hard to fix.
[–]executex 0 points1 point2 points 15 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
A good exercise I recommend (well you can tell me if it works for you or not), is before you go to a club, sit or lie down, and visualize an approach, and a fake conversation that lands you a phone number. The positive reinforcement and belief that this is very plausible scenario, may help you get over the AA for a bit.
But hey, in the heat of the moment, everyone can have a sudden AA attack. It's similar to choking while playing a sport or game. It's when you feel self conscious. Like you're about to throw a basketball, and then you even for a split second, think you might miss, you WILL miss. So you can't think that way.
Another issue is that maybe we are trying to be too quick and lengthy in your approach. Like we're desperately trying to avoid the 'awkward silences' and so we think so hard to think of a lengthy opener or conversation. Perhaps just saying "hello how r you", might be enough and just be silent, something may come to you in the heat of the moment. My goal is to try to do that when I can't think of anything, "hi how r u", and progress from there, without even thinking of a plan.
[–]MothershipConnection 1 point2 points3 points 15 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Don't think it would work as well for me. I have a tendency to live in my head sometimes and get completely lost in my train of thoughts (good for music or programming, bad for talking to people), and I've found in the past that visualization hasn't really helped me as much as other people. I've tried it while playing sports, I'll get too focused on what should happen instead of just reacting to what is. What helps more is if I can just relax and let go and be carefree for once. I can be a bit overly competitive and Type A at times, especially like recently when I've been stressed about work and other things, but I generally perform better when I'm relaxed and free flowing. The best openers I've had pretty much come unthinkingly.
Not sure what can help this. Meditation? I am not sure.
I meant doing it before you go out. And it's not really meditation, just a fantasy thinking exercise. To help you get over any nerves.
[–]SunRaAndHisArkestra 0 points1 point2 points 15 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I am not into #4 at all, but god help #2 if I ever run into her in this big world.
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[–]cheddarchexmix 3 points4 points5 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]MothershipConnection 2 points3 points4 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]executex 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]chumpta 2 points3 points4 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]MothershipConnection 1 point2 points3 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]reph 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]executex 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]MothershipConnection 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]executex 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]SunRaAndHisArkestra 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link