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BloodyButUnbowed1 Archive

View 14 posts and 215 comments by BloodyButUnbowed1 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

Thank you and Happy New Year to you as well!
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/25 06:55 PM
2

You are absolutely correct, this gives me the perspective I need, thank you!
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/25 06:46 PM
1

Same!
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/24 06:36 PM
1

The problem is that I know that SHE wants to wear them but that she is afraid of HER mother who has forces her not to. My daughter is literally afraid of her. Her mother has been abusive towards me in the past, and isn't a kind person when she don't get her way. I wouldn't care if I knew that her choices were organic. I care enough not to let my ex dictate things she shouldn't.
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/24 11:56 AM
1

You're right. Thank you so much!
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 11:59 AM
1

True! Haha anytime she probes for answers she gets nothing. The more she knows, the more she tries to sabotage and mess with my personal life.
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 03:42 AM
2

That's the same thing I asked her, because she's miserable pretending to be happy. I'd rather just be miserable and work towards becoming happy. Those texts are something else, I don't even answer the calls 🤣. The calls are the worst, it's like when you have an e hour meeting at work that could have been resolved in an email that takes 3 minutes to write 😅. Yeah I dodged a Super Mario World sized bullet and so thankful that I did.
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 03:36 AM
1

True! Then they gaslight you for having morals and principles. Sadly, I think you're right, I worry for the next generation when it comes to relationships often.
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 03:31 AM
1

Haha! That's a great approach, I asked once and she got pissed 😂🤣😂
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 03:27 AM
1

Lmao she would be so mad 😂🤣😂🤣
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 03:24 AM
2

That's the plan now, I'm going to enjoy every moment of it and perhaps even cancel Netflix and Hulu because this show is more entertaining for me lol🍿
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 03:23 AM
1

You're right! Thank you so much for the thoughtful advice, I appreciate it!
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 03:20 AM
1

You're right! Thank you so much for the thoughtful advice, I appreciate it!
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 03:20 AM
1

Exactly! Thank you! I don't care who she associates with. But she is being careless and disrespectful. She brings problems to me when she shouldn't, and that's the problem.
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 03:17 AM
1

I'm going to put it this way simply, I am a public figure. He is not. She is not. Random people having my address can become a serious security issue. Consequently, I have to approach my whereabouts more discretely than the average person. She knows this, and also knows if she screws up there will be different parties that will show up and hold her accountable to the highest degree. But she likes playing with fire.
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 03:14 AM
1

Thanks bro I appreciate it! 😂
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 03:01 AM
1

Thanks brother, you too!
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 06:15 PM
8

Thanks man, I will definitely do the second part starting today and maybe sprinkle in the first part down the line. 😂 Bonus points if it's someone she likes 😅
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 04:58 PM
1

Will do man, and thanks!
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 04:53 PM
2

Yeah he is, I feel bad for the poor guy, I know what's he's in for. It's like seeing someone walk into a horror movie you just escaped. Hopefully he stalls her longer so I can get more out of dodge 😂 Yeah, I'm going to start doing that soon.
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 04:41 PM
1

Hahaha I sure will! 'It looks good on you though!" Classic!
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 04:39 PM
9

Yeah she's trying her best, but quite honestly, I look at her like my grandma now lol...except I love my grandmother.
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 04:25 PM
6

That's interesting, it's does seems to be either or. I don't understand it either. I'd be more than willing to buy them a one-way ticket across the world 🌎 😂 That's crazy! Your ex clearly has issues like mine. Your 13 year old has more sense than both of them.
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 04:16 PM
1

You're right brother and I will keep that in mind, thanks again!
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 04:11 PM
1

Haha! 😅 I know some models that are straight 10s, she won't stand a change if I did that. It might send her into cardiac arrest 🤣
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 04:09 PM
2

Same brother lol! These ex wives are like uncurable STDs. Something that you pay a hefty price for despite it being in your past. At least I only have the ex wife, having both would he unbearable!
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 04:04 PM
2

She wins the "battle", I win the "war" 😁
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 03:58 PM
1

I sure will! 😂 This whole time I've been trying not to hurt her feelings by keeping her out of my business but now?......
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 03:55 PM
1

Very true, thank you; why did I read this in Yoda's voice 😂
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 03:53 PM
6

This is legendary 😂🤣😂, I'm going to try this!
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 03:51 PM
3

Lmfaooo!!!! 😂🤣😂🤣
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 01:47 PM
3

Lmao!!! 😂😂😂 I feel like I wrote your response myself. I was mad when I made this post, but now I'm over here cracking up because it's literally a script! 😂 Sorry to hear what you're going through. It's bizarre to deal with. Why can't they just leave us alone like how we do them? I would even want a woman I'm interested in to see her, she would probably start to think less of me 😅
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 01:11 PM
1

Very true man, thank you for the advice, it's very helpful!
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 01:06 PM
2

I will try that, thank you!
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 01:04 PM
1

She fucked up really bad, but we try to do everything 50/50 still.
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 01:00 PM
5

You're right! I already offered to hang out with him and she got really mad 😂, so I left it alone. But now that you mention it, I will definitely do this 😂🤣😂
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 12:57 PM
3

I will be doing the mutual location thing eventually. She doesn't come in my home anymore and I don't come in her home. It's just weird for her to do that. I wouldn't show up with a girlfriend if I didn't absolutely have to.
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 12:54 PM
2

You know what, you're right, I will be as civil as possible.
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 12:51 PM
2

Haha! You're right, I will follow your advice, thank you!
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 12:50 PM
5

B-I-N-G-O! Thank you! I will do this 😂 I have zero feelings for her, I don't even remember she ever existed until its time for pick ups and drop off. Doing this can show her that. Yeah, I think she was using the guy as a crash test dummy and then would try to use it against me in court.
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 12:39 PM
1

😂😂😂😂 She goin' learn today!
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 12:33 PM
6

So true, I think you're right! She does everything to try to get a reaction out of me, but doesn't realize I don't care about her at all. I just don't need any strange men around my house.
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 12:32 PM
4

Yeah she pretends to be blind to this, I may have to start bringing strange hot women by for her to get the message 😂
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 12:28 PM
1

Oh no that never happened lol, I just don't want him around my house at all. Now if they were married or in a relationship for a long time and I got to know him, I wouldn't mind.
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 12:22 PM
5

Yeah he doesn't. I can't even get him to get out the car lol. I'm a big dude so I get it but I would feel better about it if I was actually able to get to know him better.
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 12:20 PM
8

Lmaooooo! 😂 I honestly think we'd be friends if it wasn't for her. I tried to but she forbid him to befriending me because she don't want the truth to come out on why and how the marriage ended. I'm not surprised because she'd have to lie to everyone not to look like a piece of shit.
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 12:18 PM
5

Oh he's staying inside the car, she's not allowed in my house either due to her past actions. I never seen him standing lol.
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 12:15 PM
2

About 150k as of right now smh
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/24 11:52 AM
1

Yes it is
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/24 12:43 PM
1

My horrid ex has kept my last name, but she really needs to change it. It's embarrassing to have someone so horrible run around bashing my name to others with lies but wants the keep it. The irony.....
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/24 01:34 AM
3

Add my ex to that list, she literally attacked me today.
/r/Divorce_Men22/01/24 09:37 PM
5

Peace.
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/23 06:34 AM
14

I was asking myself the same question the past few days. I still lose money from divorcing her and what do I get in return....nothing! Everything I benefit from (freedom), she gets too and then some. Then she has the nerve to say she got nothing out of the relationship while I have taken care of her for 17 years and gave her a life she couldn't give herself. What I get? Some mediocre used box?! Keep your head up man, they usually always leave with more than they came with or put in, I learned my…
/r/Divorce_Men30/10/23 03:44 PM
1

Thanks man, I appreciate it!
/r/Divorce_Men30/10/23 03:28 PM
2

That's fucked up man, sorry to hear you going through this. Fuck her! Some women have no limits to their disrespect. Keep your head up brother!
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/23 10:08 AM
5

Congrats man! Best news I've heard all day. I wish my divorce was like yours but it could be worse.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/23 05:58 PM
3

Same thing happened to me and I think about it every damn day. Now my stbx wife complains everyday but all of her complaints she pushed on me: marriage, kids, you name it...
/r/Divorce_Men15/10/23 01:54 PM
1

Great idea, thank you
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/23 05:31 PM
1

I agree man, thanks
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/23 05:31 PM
3

Thanks I definitely need to jump on that, I want to nip it in the bud before it becomes a bigger problem. I got my locksmith ready to go lol 😆
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/23 12:51 PM
1

True and thank you for the kind words
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 03:35 AM
1

I don't think folks understand how important liking your partner is in a long term relationship.
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 03:25 AM
1

Indeed bro! She then wonders why I don't want to "fight to keep things alive" lol.
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 02:50 AM
1

Well at first I didn't want the divorce, too many great memories before she turned abusive. Then I stayed for the kids. Now I'm leaving for myself and the kids. The memories still hurt, but I really don't have any other choice.
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 02:43 AM
2

I'm going to run like my life depends on it bro, because it does!
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 01:57 AM
1

Yeah man it's tough not feeling able to tell your story to family and friends, it takes a lot of maturity to do what you did/are doing brother.
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 01:38 AM
4

Yeah man I'm out, the guilt tripping I've been getting from both my family, her family, and her is not working anymore.
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 01:13 AM
0

Yeah I agree man, but she wasn't completely unattractive for 15 years, she just wasn't fit for 15 years if that makes sense? She went from thin to thick but I realized that the thick she was was fat once I got older and my taste in women changed. I used to like her type of thick but now I dont. When I met her she was a 9, then she went down to a 8, then went down to a 5 (text book obese, 5ft 5 220lbs) then up to a 7 for like ten years and now back down to a 5 (I'd give her a 6 or 7 but her attit…
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 01:09 AM
1

Will do man! Thank you!
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 12:54 AM
1

Yup, for me it's both. Everyday there's an argument and everyday I wished I didn't have a dead bedroom
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 12:53 AM
1

Yeah it's sad man. I'm going to go with my gut and leave asap lol.
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 12:38 AM
1

Yeah I worded my post wrong, Im just fed up, needed to rant and get some feedback. I'll check out your post and gain some more wisdom on the situation it's tough. You're right, better days are ahead bro.
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 12:36 AM
2

True man. Yeah, I always prioritized focus over women my whole life so I will keep that going. Thanks brother, I appreciate it!
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 12:19 AM
2

Will do brother! I have to break it off, no matter however anyone sees the situation from the outside. I'm not into telling people I know about her mental health and abusive ways so I've been trying to hide it.
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 12:16 AM
1

Thanks brother!
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 12:13 AM
1

You're right man, it's eating me up and I don't want to be negative. I just want peace. She just wants to fight and I'm not giving that to her. I want better for myself and children.
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 12:09 AM
1

Yeah it was mine too. My son gave me a look today after she started yelling at me for simply just being calm after a hard day of work.
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 12:06 AM
1

It honestly doesn't, its just the icing on the cake bro.
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 12:04 AM
-2

I feel you but that is what's bothering me today. I've been looking up videos on similar situations and most of them are about keeping a woman attracted, which I'm not looking for. I just wanted to rant a little before finally pulling the plug.
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 12:01 AM
2

As for the physical part I have tried everything on my end, therapy, gym membership, bought a home gym, put up money for a personal trainer, changed the food we bought, etc. She is just complacent. I just edited the part about my sexual market value due to possibly doxxing myself. Just know, I'm in the 6 feet 6 pack 6 figure club (and then some) and pretty notable so I'm not worried about the dating scene at all lol.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/23 11:57 PM
2

Sorry to hear man, I feel like I have to leave now. It's like your username, nothing is never enough for someone with BPD.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/23 11:49 PM
2

Sorry to hear you went through that and yeah man I don't think the folks leaving negative comments don't understand what it's like to be in this sort of situation.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/23 11:47 PM
3

Yup, because with Borderline Personality Disorder there is this thing called "splitting." Look it up if you're not familiar. She filed after hitting me in the head with a broom after walking away from her nonsense.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/23 11:46 PM
1

Yeah I feel like she's always had it, but once she got pregnant it really started to show and get worse. Getting threatened with weapons and getting punched is no joke. I tried to make it work for the kids early on but then it got worse and they want us to divorce so you know it's bad.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/23 11:41 PM
2

I done everything you listed above with no success. She makes excuses for everything but has no real reason not to succeed. She has no drive in life, I'm the opposite; and would like to have a partner who shares at least some drive. She has anger issues and is abusive. At this point, there's no point in staying. I take care of my kids to the extreme, I already got all of the financial stuff solved and taken care of.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/23 11:39 PM
1

She is destroying my peace. She starts arguments everyday, has a tendency to get violent. She doesn't add anything to my life at this point. Everytime I get away from her my life gets miraculously better and then she comes waltzing back. Not this time...
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/23 11:33 PM
1

Yeah I guess domestic violence against men isn't something some folks don't take seriously. My wife should be in jail, I got her violence on video but the only reason she isn't is because the kids.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/23 11:30 PM
1

No the kids told me they want us to divorce to stop all of the fighting ....I want to divorce just based off of their request alone. They know their mom is a hothead that starts shit.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/23 11:28 PM
1

Yeah man it will be but I can't put a price tag on peace of mind! I'm just miserable right now so I think my new found freedom will help me become more productive all around.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/23 10:49 PM
6

I fell in love with her personality but it seems she became abusive after developing Borderline Personality Disorder 7 years ago. Once she punched me in the face the attraction was lost...
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/23 10:44 PM
3

Yeah I got to leave, the ship has already sunk, I just need to swim to the surface...
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/23 10:42 PM
3

Exactly! I'd do anything for my kids including divorcing her to improve all of our lives in the long-run. I paid for everything for almost 20 years. She doesn't get that that is not the norm. I agree, I can't wait to get to that point. She loves to put me and my earnings down, but sure love to spend them and benefit from my work.
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/23 12:51 AM
2

Yup, they don't know what they want...mine would always complain for the opposite no matter if I was the lion or house cat. Then told me she'd rather me be a cheetah.
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/23 12:18 AM
2

Facts on facts!
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/23 12:15 AM
5

Hey man, I went through and going through the same thing. My stbx wife says stupid shit like, "you would be paying all the bills if you lived on your own anyway". Meanwhile....I would live a lot more modestly. Without her I be a high earning single man without 3 kids and a wife to support. That makes a world of a difference in just the "you'd have to pay bills anyway" argument. Looking back, all of my money woes originated from something she "needed" at the moment....
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/23 12:13 AM
2

Yup, this right here. Some people get so entitled that they just EXPECT you to pay all their bills and take care of them and can still be disrespectful. I'd be taken aback if someone ever paid a bill for me lol.
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/23 12:07 AM
2

Same brother, I never been blatantly disrespected until I got married. I don't plan on it happening again. If someone tries to, I'll walk away....
/r/Divorce_Men15/07/23 10:52 PM
1

I hear you on that brother and thank you for your service!
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 06:41 PM
1

Thank you! I used to wonder that too, but it turns out she doesn't. I was very concerned about her. I care for the kids for half the day before I work. And then she takes care of them throughout the afternoon to night so we're pretty balanced at home too. I guess she wants to have her cake and eat it too.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 02:54 PM
2

Thanks King!
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 01:55 PM
1

Thank you and I'll be sure to find a therapist. I can't continue this way.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 01:55 PM
2

Thanks brother! I'm sorry you had to go through all of that. I feel very similar, it's like once I seen things for what they truly were, the attraction and romantic love was lost. My wife blamed me for her hitting me. Now she sweeps it under the rug as old news, but managed to complain about things from 17 years ago! I too didn't start standing up for myself until 5 years ago, since then we've been butting heads. I've been looking at places because this is ridiculous man.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 01:54 PM
1

Thanks for the encouraging words and will do brother.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 11:15 AM
1

True man, I know what you mean. Best of luck with everything!
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 10:58 AM
1

Yeah it sucks, but I hope your situation improves.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 10:55 AM
2

Wow man, I'm glad kids weren't in the mix, I love my kids, I just hate the feeling of having to coparent with someone with a short fuse until all 3 are adults. You're right, I too thought I could fix things but I didn't recognize early on that she would never be truly happy after the goal post kept being moved time and time again.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 10:50 AM
2

Haha! 😆 You're right man, and thank you I appreciate it.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 10:42 AM
1

Hey man I feel you on that. I went to some of the best schools in the U.S. and came from a poor single parent household. I'm an outlier and I have seen it everyday with my peers at these institutions. I worried about this as well, however since I know all the ins and outs, I'm not too worried about my children's prospects as they're on pace to go to top 5 schools too. I plan to make up for it by going above and beyond elsewhere. Do you plan on leaving after your children are settled into college…
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 04:05 AM
1

Wow! I suspect my stbxw has BPD too, all of her behaviors checks out and it explains her crazy mood swings, painting me black, and rage.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 03:56 AM
1

Thank you and sorry you had to deal with that brother. That's a damn shame. My stbxw is the same way it's uncanny. I'm glad to hear that your life improved and that you are now in a healthy relationship. Out of curiosity, is your ex wife still miserable and unaccountable as she was at the end of your relationship? I have a feeling these type of people do not change even if it is clear as day that they had failures and shortcomings in the relationship.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 03:53 AM
2

Exactly, the odds of marriage working out for any man is bad odds.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 03:44 AM
1

I bet man, I wish I could fast forward to that moment now lol. The stress I get from being in the same house as her is through the roof because she just can't help but be an asshole.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 03:43 AM
2

Glad to you're doing well after dealing with that. Thanks for the advice, I'm going to work on that because it seems like I can break my neck trying to make the transition smoother but then it just turns into "I hate you, you did this to me, it's all of your fault and none of mine." You can't reason with crazy...
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 12:35 AM
1

So unfortunate, but so true. I know mines did...
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 12:32 AM
2

True, yeah I done the grey rock before and now I have to do it again until we no longer live together. Even when that time comes I don't want to talk to her anymore.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 12:25 AM
3

Wow man, just got done watching it, that guy's ex wife is a horrible person.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 12:08 AM
2

Thanks brother, I wish the best of luck to you too!
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 12:05 AM
5

Thanks man, I will definitely vet well whenever I begin to date again. I'm riding solo unless she's really special. I'm not getting married again though lol. I'm at a point in my life where I value peace, freedom, and my health over everything else.
/r/Divorce_Men21/06/23 11:39 PM
3

Lmao! Mother knows best bro lol. Hopefully someone listens to us when we warn them about marriage in the future. Save a lot of pain and heartache.
/r/Divorce_Men21/06/23 11:31 PM
5

So true man, they blow good situations and then get mad at the hand that fed them. I wish someone would provide for me for as long as I did for her, I'd look like I did in my 20s lol. She better hope some simp comes and saves her. I hope they do so she can leave me alone lol
/r/Divorce_Men21/06/23 11:28 PM
2

Thanks man, life is already hard enough. Let alone having a vindictive woman nagging me to death over choices she made in life. I knew I should've listened to my intuition.
/r/Divorce_Men21/06/23 11:23 PM
3

She is quite evil in the head, so I'm definitely not looking forward to that part. I honestly fear for her mental health when that time comes, because I'm not going to downgrade that's all I'll say 😂😂😂
/r/Divorce_Men21/06/23 11:20 PM
7

Thanks man, I relate to a lot of stories on that channel. One day, I think I will look back and be relieved that I threw in the towel before it was too late.
/r/Divorce_Men21/06/23 09:06 PM
2

Just leave bro, been in this same situation. It never gets better, only worse. And you will look back and regret not leaving earlier. PM me if you'd like to talk because we have a lot in common and I think I can provide some clarity for your situation.
/r/Divorce_Men27/05/23 10:59 PM
1

Yeah that was the same I was thinking. I rejected an OM offer due to, it severely changing the dynamics of our relationship and how other people would influence things and potential problems that would come of it. It seem like it may be more difficult to have a open relationship later down the line than up front. I could have always gave it a try but I didn't want to make things worse and still split. Plus it may cause an uproar to the public if one of her partners decide to pillow talk.
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/23 04:38 PM
1

Definitely, and thank you my friend.
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/23 04:33 PM
1

Facts man! They're never truly satisfied.
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/23 11:20 AM
3

Hey man, sorry to hear about your situation. I just been through something similar. Divorce is hard man. You not only divorce from the person, I would argue you divorce shared things such as memories, and you divorce your identity. You truly become one when your with someone the majority of your life. Just curious do you think an open relationship would work in your situation?
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/23 11:12 AM
2

I feel you man, I feel the same way. My wife divorced me and I wake up everyday wondering could things have worked out. We have the pretty much the same overall.
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/23 11:04 AM
2

Thanks man, I may have a glass once I get a hold of things
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/23 09:56 PM
1

Thank you, I just could not take it anymore.
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/23 09:39 PM
1

Oh no she doesn't have a job yet. But yeah it sucks but the only direction to go is forward.
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/23 09:36 PM
1

Thanks man. Yeah, she is too aggressive in that department for my liking. She would apologize and stopped doing it, but then there was times where she'd get really mad, she would threaten to hit me. Too much anger to deal with. Sorry to hear, does she speak to you or give you the silent treatment? Mine seems to have a way of cutting me off and we have children too.
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/23 05:23 PM
1

Bingo man! That is the true reality of divorce. Sometimes I wish we had a much shorter relationship to get over it quicker. Sorry to hear man, that's tough. I hate that feeling. If you ever need to talk feel free to PM me.
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/23 11:40 AM
1

Sorry to hear man, that's horrible. If you ever need to talk you can always PM me. All the memories, inside jokes, etc. makes it so hard to move on. I just woke up from a dream we were still happily married and woke up extremely disappointed. They say time heals all wounds, but I don't think I'm going to wait for time to heal things. I think guys like us need to proactively heal ourselves.
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/23 11:35 AM
2

Yeah I think they will regret it fast brother. I think women tend to be happier early on after divorce and then come back to reality once they don't find love again like they did once before.
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/23 03:02 AM
2

I'm sort of hoping someone will to distract her from blaming me for "ruining her life" for the rest of my life lol. Shoot if I ruined her life by providing everything I possibly could for 17 years, I need someone to come ruin mines lol.
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/23 06:51 PM
2

Thank you brother, I really needed this! Thank you for the kind words and insight, I know you're right. I will put your advice into practice and live the best damn life I can!
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/23 06:49 PM
1

Very true my friend.
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/23 06:20 PM
3

You're right man. I decided to make a stand today. To become the person I always wanted to be that I couldn't be with her. It will be very tough, but nothing great comes easy. I will keep on brother!
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/23 05:03 PM
3

This is exactly how I feel. I feel like a part of me has died with her even though she is still physically here. To me that's the worst kind of death. The death of someone who is still here physically. It is one that will haunt me for quite some time. Hopefully not forever (my death).
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/23 05:01 PM
2

You're right. I just feel a little guilty that I could've done more, even though in the back of my mind, it wouldn't have mattered and we would of divorced anyway because of how she is now. I told her that if she was this way in the beginning we would have never dated in the first place. After over a year of going through this divorce process it doesn't necessarily feel much easier. But you're right my friend, I am the only person keeping me from moving on and being happy again. It's just really…
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/23 04:57 PM
2

Yeah she's getting a job and It's over now. I'm just trying to keep the peace and my sanity.
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/23 04:49 PM
1

I hope the best for you my friend. It's tough keeping it peaceful when someone doesn't care to be. I would keep a tape recorder or a phone on record for any tense situations that may occur. No, she when she got pregnant with our first she started to get more aggressive and short tempered. It's sad because I know she has changed and she does not see anything wrong with it. She would rather me become more like her than for her to be more easy going when dealing with people and me. Surprisingly our…
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/23 04:47 PM
7

Thank you. I agree, I just can't be treated this way and constantly blamed for it due to my shortcomings in life. Well, we agreed will have to live together until she moves out and gets her own place and I help her do so. 21 years is a long time man, sorry to hear. How are you coping with everything?
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/23 01:05 PM
11

True, once they get mad all of the time, its time to reevalute if its their time to move on because they have to convince themselves that you are this "bad guy" and always have been. That makes the new guy "always better" even when hes clearly not.
/r/Divorce_Men09/04/23 03:31 AM
2

The best revenge is a life well lived and success!
/r/Divorce_Men09/04/23 01:58 AM
1

We tried counseling and it didnt help. We do read and that is helpful for changing our persepctive overall, but she feels Im just a bad husband towards her when most women would be happy just to have me around. The funny thing is she started the problems and now complain that we have them. We realized that we are much different people than we were when we met 17 years ago. We both have faults and we learned how to get along better overall, but its still not enough. Its been so long, I dont think…
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/23 02:29 PM
0

Were doing 50/50 custody and Im already going to do stuff for the other household that is actually "more valuable" than the child support dollar amount she would get. So it would be counterintuitive for her to do so. Ultimately, we both are looking out for the kids as much as possible. She understands not to play with the kids, and we separated before for a while and she always kept her word so Im pretty sure she wont break it. If she does, to court I go lol!
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/23 02:22 PM
1

I agree man, I did accept it, its just she doesnt and flip flops with her emotions. Im just going to keep it moving and finalize the divorce regardless of how she feels. She doesnt realize things suck because we NEED to divorce and move on.
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/23 02:17 PM
0

I survived a school shooting before, not fun. I conceal carry everywhere and do not like to put my life in the hands of others, especially if they do not have a gun. There was even a school shooting the other month at one of the schools I wanted to send them to... Fortunately I have the option that most parents dont and I cherish that more now than ever.
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/23 02:12 PM
1

Thanks man, will do and I appreciate your insight!
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/23 02:05 PM
1

Thanks for the advice but we settled already, noncontested. I wont be paying alimony or child support. I see and spend time with my kids everyday, the only thing in question is whether or not we may reconcile before telling the clerks to finalize the last paper for the divorce to be completed.
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/23 02:03 PM
2

Hey man, much respect! I appreciate your input, honesty, resilence, and courage. I feel the same way, Im in that state of mind but my wife isnt. But I have to do what I got to do at the end of the day. I also loved the idea of my wife, but everyday reminds me that my idea isnt reality and that the clock of life is ticking to the point where I do not want to waste the rest of my youth in a dead marriage. Much success to you, and good luck with everything brother!
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/23 04:19 AM
1

Youre right man and thank you! If you dont mind me asking, who cheated in your relationship? I feel like when people stay for the wrong reasons someone is going to eventually cheat. I dont plan on it, but I have to get my needs met eventually. I dont find my wife attractive anymore in any way. So its hard not to lust for women when I havent had good sex in months. So if its not over by the end of this summer I will have to just leave to be happy. Your marriage sounds similar to mine. I feel like…
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/23 03:55 AM
3

Keep your head up brother! You have survived 100% of your bad days in life, you will continue to survive but you have to keep going. It's hard, you got to keep it pushing. I was pretty much where you were last year. Take things one day at a time. Set goals and work towards to. Remember, any progress is still progress. I still have a way to go, but when I look back to last year, I'm so thankful that I did not give up. That what motivate me not to give up now. I hope you find the same inspiration …
/r/Divorce_Men05/02/23 07:04 PM
5

Going through that journey now, Im getting a divorce to get away from my abusive wife; coparenting is going to be tough. Keep your head up man; its always darkest before the dawn.
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/22 03:15 PM
1

Same here man. Currently going through this. She wants to reconcile but doesn't want to improve on anything.
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/22 02:23 PM
2

Exactly! She doesnt get how that changes things in my mind. Like, you filed and expect me to turn into SuperSimp, hell naw! Shes real fickle with decisions these days. I told her thats on her, get anger management and stop making rash decisions and life would get better for her.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/22 11:10 AM
2

Youre right man, thats what is making moving on easier. I stayed too long but better late than never. I cant be with someone who doesnt respect me.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/22 11:04 AM
2

Sorry to hear brother. Every man has his breaking point. Accountability goes a long way in a relationship.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/22 10:59 AM
4

I am, Im running like Usain Bolt out here brother lol!
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/22 01:13 AM
2

Yeah compared to what most people are going through, I would rather do things the easy way and never marry again
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 09:30 PM
1

Man I wish because it would be so much easier to cut ties with her. She makes it seem like Im throwing our family away. Meanwhile her actions and words did the bulk of that.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 09:08 PM
2

She filed already but yeah I think its moreso due to Borderline Personality Disorder. People with Bpd flip their emotions more than Jackie Chan.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 09:06 PM
1

I think its because I do well, got my life together, and have grown as a person through all of this. There will not be any alimony or child support and I see my kids everyday. Once we divorce we will do 50/50 custody and I could get full if I really wanted to. We geniunely care for each other beyond marriage but she dont have much to complain about so it makes sense for her to want to reconcile.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 09:03 PM
5

No, not that I know of. But I think she has a mental disorder that swings her mood like crazy (Borderline).
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 08:59 PM
1

Wow man, sams here. I can see right through her crap, but even still she will try to find any opportunity to tell me about myself but it never works. Then if I flip the script, double standards galore!
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 08:51 PM
2

Yeah Im out man lol!
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 08:42 PM
1

Thanks for the advice! Yeah if my kids were older I would do that but my youngest is 3 and I dont think Id survive another 15 years of this. Plus I have other ventures and aspirations that she would never agree with if we were to remain married. Once she became abusive I had to really question everything.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 08:41 PM
2

Thanks brother! Are you suggesting to reconcile to plan a clean exit? If so, I have done so since the 1st time she filed on me in 2017 but now shes doing the same thing but now I am prepared and privy to her b.s.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 08:37 PM
3

Man you hit it right on the nail! I been meaning to read it but I just forced myself to buy it because enough is enough and I know my decisions are sound.The gaslighting and guilt tripping used to cloud my vision, but I see clearly now.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 07:25 PM
1

Exactly! This is what Ive been trying tell her but she doesnt want to change for me. I tell her to change for herself so that we can comeback as better people and then try to make it work. She then says Im only one with problems so shes not going to work on herself. Her definition of working on the marriage is being affectionate and being kind only when we are on good terms. She and I both know, outside of dealing with her, I dont have any major issues in life. I work on myself everyday and I be…
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 06:13 PM
2

Thank you! Ive done that before with her as she filed before back in 2017 and then cancelled it so I know exactly what you mean brother. Its just that this time around I feel like the answer/solution is clear. I really feel like she does not deserve me anymore.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 06:07 PM
1

Respectfully, all of that doesnt apply to our situation, we already worked all of that out in writing, its just being together part in question.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 06:04 PM
4

The visual of that couple is priceless 😂😂😂
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/22 02:49 PM
2

Thank you so much; I will add those to my to-read list too!
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/22 02:56 PM
2

Yeah it does, I think my stbx wife had one but will never admit it. But I got her on a technical so she's cheated regardless. Good riddens to her.
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/22 02:33 PM
5

Wow, this comment is gold! Thank you so much I will be using it as a resource and Im sure other men will as well. I've read a great deal of the books on Borderlines (my stbx wife is a borderline).They were super helpful. Any advice or book recommendations for fathers during and/or after divorce? This is my main struggle as of late. I think doing all that you recommended above will help with it overall.
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/22 02:31 PM
2

This right here man...I literally just felt relief when she left the room because she was accusing me of being an asshole because I asked her to ask me before spending my money on me. We have separate finances all provided by me...
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/22 02:14 PM
1

Hey man, I'm in a very similar situation. Keep the rings and do not give them back (unless you two truly reconcile). I noticed women use that tactic as manipulation go get you to respond emotionally and irrationally to get what they want out of you (as a last ditch manipulation effort). Do not leave the home, as that can come back to bite you in the ass with custody, even if she doesn't do those types of things. My stbx wife doesn't but I wouldn't take a chance on it because women change when th…
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/22 02:09 PM
1

Thank you and will do! 🙂
/r/Divorce_Men14/09/22 08:45 PM
2

Hey brother I appreciate the encouraging words! I think you're right. I bet she cheated. The one thing I don't have to worry about is my kids because I got her number on tape. Plus she doesn't believe in keeping kids away from their father and we've coparented before so I don't see that changing. The only thing I'm worried about now is finances, my mental health, and recovering from this relationshit.
/r/Divorce_Men13/09/22 12:06 AM
1

Wow sorry to hear about your experience. Thank you so much for the thoughtful words! It's over but I'll try to grow from this and remain as respectful as I can and give my kids the best life I possibly can.
/r/Divorce_Men12/09/22 11:59 PM
3

I agree 100%, and I never looked at her the same and told her once she did it my attraction to her died. I just haven't told my family but I did tell a friend and some mental health people because I had to get that off my chest. I appreciate you and your support! She tried to marginalize it like it was no big deal but it's too dangerous of a game to even be around. She's toxic and abusive and deserves the worst. I got it on camera with my 3 kids as witnesses so she's fucked. I plan to speak on i…
/r/Divorce_Men12/09/22 10:14 PM
2

Naw man I don't have to worry about that, just trust me when I say that 😉
/r/Divorce_Men12/09/22 03:29 PM
1

Wow man, that's progress and peace. I just hope my stbx wife vets new men well because I don't want any pedophiles or abusive men around my children. Good luck with everything brother!
/r/Divorce_Men12/09/22 03:31 AM
1

Wow man, are you divorced now or still in the process? If so, have things got better for you?
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 09:55 PM
2

Man that's horrible, sorry to hear. I hate when people move the goal post to where you feel you'll never be good enough.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 09:53 PM
1

Wow man sorry to hear. Was she always ungrateful or turned that way after awhile? Mines did.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 09:52 PM
3

It's is and I'm working hard to get this over with asap. She can be someone else's problem henceforth. Not my clown, not my circus.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 07:29 PM
1

That's crazy man and I'm sorry to hear. I could never do someone like that. Ole "what have you done for me lately" type of people.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 07:27 PM
1

Sorry to hear man, I'm definitely divorcing her. Yeah that's how I feel too. It's a damn shame good men have to endure this kind of ungratefulness.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 07:13 PM
2

Thank you!
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 04:26 PM
2

Wow that's a sad story, depressing. I sure hope my wife doesnt off herself. But she's dumb enough to believe her delusion so I think she will be okay. She's a great mother and that's all I hope she be moving forward. I'm preparing for the worst though...
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 04:02 PM
2

Thank you so much brother for the inspiring words! I don't accept abuse anymore and love myself more than ever. I never realized how much I let people get away with until I met her. Good luck to you too and if you ever need to vent/chat feel free to PM me.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 03:49 PM
1

Yup, and the funny thing is mine tries to compare me to everyone but I'm doing everything at an elite level besides her being my woman (although I'm great with women). Once your wife is not able to just spend and not worry about it. She will start to see how normal life I'd for people. She will worry then.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 03:43 PM
2

Okay will do right now!
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 03:40 PM
5

Yeah Imma go with the first option but I'm going to make her miserable through my success. I've always been out of her league so to speak so the type of women she will see me with will kill her inside. She's really mad she can't break me.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 03:39 PM
2

I'm so sorry to hear man. It's a great book, I'm going to read it again and also the Stop Walking on Eggshells book to give me a mental boost that I need right now. It's so crazy how you can literally give her the world and then she turns around doesn't appreciate it. Then she'd probably date and then look around and say "where did all the good men go?" Well she had one, but blew it.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 03:33 PM
2

I agree and know brother. I just put that there to show that I used to go out of my way while she is now saying anyone could do that stuff for her. I always told her the only person that could make you happy is yourself and she used to get mad at me saying that because she didn't want to be accountable for herself.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 03:29 PM
2

Exactly! You're right! She gets mad because I gave up, but she gave up over 2 years ago so I know when I need to wave the white flag and pack things up. I really feel I can accomplish anything I put my mind to once the divorce is final and she moves out.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 03:23 PM
1

Thing is, I got domestic abuse by her on camera so many times over, if she ever tried that she'd loose 100% custody. We split before and did joint custody 2 years ago without going to court or anything so I don't think anything will change. I do have assets but they're protected in various ways. I thought about this stuff ahead of time. But thankfully she don't want child or spousal support money from me. However, I am reasonable to help her out if she helps me out with things like childcare so …
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 03:21 PM
2

I do most of the time, last Friday was the first day my children has seen me cry. It was my breaking point because my kids heard her say the bullshit but I try my best to show them how a mature adult handles things and how a man handles things. I'm glad they seen it because now they really know their mother is a hurtful person. It's just my turn of being hurt by her.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 03:13 PM
1

Thank you, I'm going to buy all 3 today. I've had Unplugged Alpha in my cart for so long and today is the day I feel like I need to read it. I love Rich's videos.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 03:05 PM
1

Definitely, she hates on me now so I really know she will despise me in the future.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 03:03 PM
3

I have been thinking of hiring one, I definitely will have proof waiting if she changes her tune on assets and the children.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 03:02 PM
3

I agree 100% man, fuck her! She can't stand I want nothing to do with her anymore. I'll get my revenge through continued success.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 06:03 AM
5

I do have self respect, once she did that all was done and I decided to divorce her. For some reason she starts arguments with me about this dumb shit when we split in the first place (still live togeher temporarily). I simply explain were done as stated before and good luck in life. I want to be far away from her and her negativity asap! I'm just focused on myself and kids now.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 05:02 AM
12

Thanks man, will do! Life will teach her some lessons.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 04:53 AM
4

Yeah, once it is done I will have some peace of mind.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 04:48 AM
15

I 100% believe this and I can almost confirm this. I can't go no further with her because of that. It's like the insults are due to her having someone else. I can't imagine myself saying "any woman can take care of my sexual needs and treat me well" if there wasn't another one doing it. Common sense tells me, if everyone could do it than there wouldn't be a problem because she'd do all that I need. She mention other men way too much and says shit like she may date a guy who not as well off as me…
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 04:46 AM
12

Will do man, she's gonna learn the hard way. Crazy part is, no one does jack shit for her outside of myself. She must think she's special to the entire world or something
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 04:39 AM
8

Yeah she wants to end the marriage noncontested and dont want anything fortunately. For me it's the fact she feels all the sacrifices and work I've put in doesnt mean anything. It's 100% time for a divorce. She filed the other day.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/22 04:29 AM
1

Personally, I'm at this point too, definitely get a divorce. As you know it only gets worse and no one is getting any younger. It sucks, I know but you owe it to yourself to be happy and at peace.
/r/Divorce_Men16/08/22 03:40 AM
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