I (35m) and my Stbx (35f) wife have been separated for a little over a year and the divorce should be finalized in a few weeks. We have three young children. Unfortunately, we have to parrallel parent instead of coparent because she is very immature and bitter.

Because of this, I haven't verbally spoke to her in 8 months. So my son has a birthday coming up in a few weeks. She texted me saying that she and her side of the family is going to have a little get together for him and invite a few of his friends. Thing is, since she doesn't speak to me, I think it would he awkward to show up at her event with her family who I haven't spoke to or seen since last year. On one hand I want to be there for my son, but I also don't want to deal with people who may or may not be weird and distant from me because of her. For my kids' birthdays and holidays, I tried doing joint celebrations with her but she would always start an issue after the celebration for no reason outside of being bitter. In this case, I just have to show up. However, as of recent, I've been avoiding her like the plague and life has been peaceful. My son's birthday falls on one of her days, and I just want to see him on his birthday but will celebrate with him the day after on my day. Reddit, what do you recommend I do.