So my wife and I have been married for about 13 years (both 35, 3 young kids) and she recently filed for a divorce non-contested. A week after she filed she wanted to reconcile. The issue I have with her is that she is too controlling, jealous, and has anger issues.

She thinks the solution to our problems is to be really affectionate and just "get along." Now we have been getting a long, but its only because I have matured mentally and we were not dealing with each other romantically.

All of a sudden, she is kissing on me all the time and acting like we didnt have underlying issues. I told her that it makes me feel uncomfortable because we are not on the same page and I dont want her getting the wrong idea that "we are together" without coming to an agreement.

I've been working on myself and she still thinks its only me who has issues. She takes no accountability for her actions and makes it seem like Im the bad guy even though I poured my heart out to her why I am the way I am now (about how I dont have time to stress in life and do relationship drama anymore, I just want to treat people better and be a good person). She said she respected it, but then turned around and "put us back together" without my permission. Due to things she have said and done, I lost attraction to her mentally and physically. She just says "you either want to be with me or not, its that simple." My heart and mind says elsewise. To me its another one of her horrible ultimatums that I should have walked away from a long time ago.

What are your thoughts on this? Im just over here just making sure Im not being unreasonable.