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JimSevere0271 Archive

View 11 posts and 19 comments by JimSevere0271 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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5

My stbxw always thought she had everything figured out and she was the smartest person in the room even though most of her plans ended disastrously. I don't think this divorce is going to be any different. She will get probably a somewhat large payment for the equity of the house and retirement etc etc but I don't think it'll be as much as she thinks it will be and The money will eventually run out.... Especially the way she is irresponsible with money band if her side of the family gets a hold …
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/24 05:49 PM
10

Dude. My situation is very very similar. But trust me when I say you have to focus on the fact that you cannot control other people's feelings or behavior. when you boil it down it's because she's incredibly selfish. there's just no other way around it. and if she's anything like the one I'm dealing with she will use every opportunity to hurt and take her anger out on you. Even though you can conceptualize why the relationship was so toxic it doesn't make it hurt any less. unfortunately all of t…
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/24 03:11 AM
1

you are not damaged goods. there is still a purpose for your life even if you can't see it.
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/24 02:13 PM
8

I am sorry you are going through this. I am too. It's been about 8 months since she left. I can tell you that the times of grieving still exist but I don't think they're as often or as long. One thing somebody told me on here that helps is that you absolutely cannot control how another person feels or behaves. You are not responsible for her actions. Selfishness is just that, selfish. Each of our situations I'm sure are somewhat different but also similar... But the pain for all of us is real. S…
/r/Divorce_Men18/03/24 06:34 PM
2

obviously the specifics of your situation is different but we have a lot of stuff in common. My wife was never really affectionate as a person but it got worse after she had a mental breakdown 10 years after we were married. from that point on she was terrified to have actual intercourse and that led into around 8 years where we didn't have actual sex..... some fooling around from time to time but it was always very transactional and mostly a chore for her. here's what you need to understand. I'…
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/24 05:47 PM
13

You are likely upset because you are a loyal person with normal human emotions. Take solace in fact that you are not a psycho like her. The thing that sucks in this world is you can't expect other people to be like you. and sometimes even when you thought you knew them it's likely that you really didn't. I'm just getting out of an 18-year marriage where my wife never gave a shit about me. I stayed because I took marriage seriously and for the kids. She only cares about herself. Most people are i…
/r/Divorce_Men13/03/24 12:30 PM
5

I understand. try to keep in mind that until someone has gone through a divorce they don't understand how absolutely devastating it can be. I think it's because it's seems to be so commonplace in our society that people that aren't going through it think it's a typically normal thing. It was never designed to be that way. My family has been here for me and I have a couple guy friends that I text with a lot and meet once in awhile. I'm also attending a class called "DivorceCare" at a local church…
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/24 02:34 PM
4

The kids thing is hard but it is BEYOND YOUR CONTROL. You can only do what you can do. That is being the best father you can be. It hurts. I'm in the middle of my divorce too. we've been separated for about 7 months and had the temporary hearing two months ago. I have some days where I breakdown, but not as often as I used to. It seems like you're pretty hard on yourself. The further you get from the relationship the more you will see that not everything was your fault. In my case....I did a lot…
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/24 02:33 PM
6

I still haven't even made it to the finalized divorce. We had the temporary hearing a couple months ago. since she left she refuses any kind of talk about anything except the kids..... There wasn't any physical or verbal abuse (I may have called her stupid once that I remember in 18 years)..... although she says there was "emotional abuse". then again, she is severely mentally ill so I'm trying to extend some type of grace because of that. I know for certain my life is better off without her but…
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/24 01:59 PM
5

I used to operate under a spirit of anger. I had a pretty good relationship with my kids before but now that the anger is gone (Thanks to God) our relationship is 10 times better. Ask God to help you so you can be more patient and loving towards them. I'm sure you're going through an incredibly stressful time right now.
/r/Divorce_Men11/03/24 01:05 AM
5

thanks
/r/Divorce_Men08/03/24 10:02 PM
1

I can absolutely identify with how you're feeling. Even though the relationship I had with her was terrible in a lot of ways on both sides.....(even though she always gaslit me to make everything my fault). I still grieve the destruction of it. I'm not crying all the time like I was a month or two ago but I'm still pretty upset. But that's the weird thing.....she acts like it is all normal. Perhaps to her it is. The whole scenario is just sad as hell.
/r/Divorce_Men08/03/24 09:57 PM
3

I don't think you're an idiot for trying to be compassionate towards a very obviously mentally ill person. I can identify with this as my STBX also struggles with mental illness. she's medicated but.... One thing I realized is that I used to think medication made a person normal.... But it doesn't.... If a person's crazy it just makes them somewhat less crazy. I think you're only issue here is the same issue that I have which I am working on and that is setting healthy boundaries. sometimes if p…
/r/Divorce_Men08/03/24 06:47 PM
6

I think what men are actually desiring, optimally, would be a faithful partner that is what a woman should be. Loving, nurturing etc etc Unfortunately in this day and age it's an incredibly rare find. So it makes sense to me that you see men never wanting to get in a relationship again with with what they know is the majority of women these days...versus still desiring a faithful companion that actually cares for them.
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/24 04:00 PM
1

they will see the truth. Even if it's not right now because of the manipulation it will eventually happen. One thing I'm struggling with is the idea that sometimes got allows things to happen to draw us closer to him. not because he's self-centered but because he knows what's best for us. maybe being with her is what would have hindered you from being the person God wants you to really be. for example, since my wife left I've lost about 80 lb and my relationship with my two boys is 10 times bett…
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/24 10:17 PM
3

I'm sorry to hear what you are going through. I can somewhat identify with the situation. in my personal experience I can tell you that behavior modification didn't work for me. The only thing that changed anything about me was a relationship with God. you have to remember that you cannot control other people. you can only decide what you are going to do. be the awesome dad that you can be and everything else will fall into place eventually. kids are smart. they will be able to see the differenc…
/r/Divorce_Men06/03/24 10:05 PM
13

I'm still in the middle of my divorce. I imagine things will be finalized sometime this spring. I just don't know what I'm going to do. I'm 47 but I do desire companionship. actual loving companionship.. something I never had in 18 years of marriage. I've just come to the conclusion that my ex is just not capable of ever providing that unless she were to have some type of work from God himself.
/r/Divorce_Men05/03/24 06:59 PM
6

there's nothing more devastating you could do to your daughters than to kill yourself. you definitely don't want to leave them alone at all times with a woman that is this out of touch with reality. I'm going through a divorce myself currently and I've had all of these thoughts as well. at the end of the day you just have to resolve to understand that just because you are a loyal person doesn't mean you can make others be. If you check out now your daughters are not going to have any kind of exa…
/r/Divorce_Men05/03/24 01:54 PM
2

Do you have any spiritual beliefs?
/r/Divorce_Men03/03/24 12:24 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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