Was told tonight by a girl friend of mine that we apparently had sex when I was drunk and she was sober and I don't remember a thing. Don't know how to feel about it.

theozoph · 2012-11-30T10:14:26+00:00

Well, that is a shitty way to lose one's virginity. And I agree with you that your friend could have exercised better judgment. She put her own desires before your friendship and well-being, and honestly anyone fucking a drunken person while sober is an asshole. I mean, can't you wait to see if they still like you/want you when they're sober?

If both of you need to drink to lose some inhibitions and get your freak on, fine. That's consensual. But to hold back and wait for the other party to incapacitate him/herself in order to get off is kind of a dick move, IMHO.

So yeah, shitty friend. Live and learn, and find people with better morals to hang with.

seeamanaboutadog · 2012-11-30T13:54:15+00:00

Care to elaborate on the situation, like you mention it happened in her friends apartment, but was everyone drinking? The other people there, will they maybe be able to say whether the two of you were flirting before hand? Did she lead you to a room in a controlling manner? Best trying to get as much information about the night before throwing around terms like 'rape' as suggested by some other answers. I am on your side, and feel bad that you do not remember your first time as I gather that you are someone who was possible holding out for someone they love.

PieMasterBob · 2012-11-30T14:06:24+00:00

blackout drunk

I think there might be a problem if you where passed out, also the fact that you don't remember it.

Throwaway19384756483 · 2012-11-30T06:46:24+00:00

so my question is: Did you have any witnesses?

and secondly, do you think she will try to rope you into daddy duty for her unborn child(ren)? I have a sneaking suspicion that she's trying to work that angle for child support. Don't let her do that, break ties with her the moment she starts getting clingy

rightsbot · 2012-11-30T06:38:18+00:00

Post text automatically copied here. (Why?) (Report a problem.)

mikesteane · 2012-12-01T07:31:21+00:00

Not the point of your post, I know. But if you drink to the point of blacking out, you are doing yourself damage, even if you do not have an accident like falling on your face. Seriously, apart from the issue you came here to talk about, you should probably consider limiting your intake.

TheSacredParsnip · 2012-11-30T11:23:49+00:00

[permanently deleted]

rapiertwit · 2012-11-30T12:01:32+00:00

[permanently deleted]

2012-11-30T13:19:58+00:00

Don't drink until you black out next time. I mean, I'm sympathetic to the feeling of unease about it, but like women that drink until they black out and willingly (<---key word) engage in sex, you're still responsible for your actions. Regardless of if you remember them or not. You participated. You didn't lay there passed out while she raped you.

That aside, most certainly talk to her about it, but you don't want to go in with the attitude that she's a rapist. She isn't. Mistakes were made though on both sides. It would be beneficial to you both to clear the air and get things off your chest in a constructive manner. You should probably get tested for STI's too. Just in case.

ICEKAT · 2012-11-30T18:14:37+00:00

I'm wondering about logistics.... How did you have sex that drunk? I can barely pee, when that drunk, let alone get hard.

You understand that you made a decision to have the sex, and are bothered because you were impared and she made crap judgement. Time to work out your friend issues then. Get her to replay what happened, see if you can get friends to witness, and make sure to let her know that you don't want anything like that Ever again. Even when drunk as a skunk. We all make mistakes, We have to grow from them.

Comments