The top 10 cruel things women do to men

CrawstonWaffle · 2009-10-24T15:32:49+00:00

Edit: fucking syntax. I know there's something wrong with the number values on the list. I didn't write them that way. When you put numbers and don't have the entire entry in one paragraph, followed by the next number value on the next line, reddit will make every number the start of a new list. I have to go to work so I'm not going to fix this, but please curtail being clever by pointing out that "Hey, it's all 1!"

This article was written by a young 20-something upper-middle class know-nothing and it shows. A real list, as BinaryShadow started, is more like this:

Using Sex/Flirting as an manipulation tool:

Sex can be a wonderful communion and expression of the male and female wildness (not savagery) intertwining, but there do exist women out there who use sex/flirting as a way to get men to be their passive followers. It can be used socially to 'tame' or otherwise harness sexually hungry men, or professionally to gather allies and make power plays.

Now, granted, it takes a certain type of man to fall so easily to sexual manipulation, but the oft-used excuse of "Feminine wiles are the only tool women have against such strong brutish men" especially in a workplace environment really doesn't hold the water some women think it does.

I'm not saying that using femininity and the resulting sexual tension of using it with a man for gain is naturally abhorrent, but there are many cases when girls and women alike use it to otherwise disrupt the free will of men they never have any intention of sleeping with.

About 80% of this article (Women using men for drinks, as a placeholder, flirting with other guys) falls under this ONE category.

Using mensturation as a manipulation device.

I must clarify here, that everything I've heard about menstruation indicates that it is very unpleasant and I do not wish to imply that men should not cut women any slack in this department.

However women that use their period as an excuse to be emotionally abusive, sexually withholding, or otherwise distancing from a man simply because his lack of direct empathy makes the subject easy leverage is being mildly cruel.

Most decent guys want to help women out when they're on their period and will put up with a lot of abuse to do it, but if a woman can't be forthcoming about when she's really suffering and when she just needs to lash out, even a long time after the fact, then she's just being immature.

Using a warped idea of gender equality, often termed "feminism" to discredit and undermine masculine ideals.

First, I am NOT with a capital N trying to say that feminism is a bad movement. It is a wonderful movement and one of the greatest things it has done has been to allow men and women alike to reclaim power from both the masculine and feminine wells for their own betterment. It has also helped reverse the eons-old male savagery that dominated politics and in many parts of the world still does.

That all said, there are many girls and women who use feminism as a smokescreen of guilt and absolution for any aggressive or defamatory actions against anyone who isn't a "liberated" woman. It often blames men as the sole cause of all evil and explicitly denies the capacity for men to do any good.

The difference between this and male chauvinism? Women take advantage of the fact that in a great deal of academic and professional settings this professed inequality of genders--men being evil and women being repossessed goddesses, which actually goes against the very idea of feminism to make both genders equal--to excuse any of their faults or actions and receive a special treatment, while denying or even suppressing any men from receiving the same.

Making a joke of male sexuality.

This one deserves equal blame on men, but because women occupy the most common recipient of male sexual energy I have to elucidate why they deserve a separate blame.

Again, this falls under the attitude of taking heterosexual sex-- the act that truly recognizes men and women as equal partners-- and making it a frivolous joke.

It can be women gossiping with friends or to other men in their lives, but the overall effect is that of fanning the flames of "alpha male" syndrome in men for whatever ends they see fit (good gossip, revenge on someone they don't like, wanting to be the center of attention, etc.).

The problem is that when guys tease other guys (in a heterosexual milieu at least) about dick size or sexual potency he's just being a competitive ass, when a woman does it there is a sense of rejection and inadequacy that leaves many men struggling to recoup their confidence and drive.

Pretending a man's income/dick size/social status/possessions are indeterminate of his quality as a partner as a sign of maturity, then immediately claiming the opposite when a man fails to conform to their standards.

Again, men can be claimed of being guilty about this for women, especially in regards to physical appearance. If you've been paying attention so far 2 of the 5 'worst qualities' in women are gender-neutral. Get used to it because even the worst quality on the list is gender-neutral.

Still, as this is about women, from the men's side of the argument there is a pervading sense from some women, not all women, that one's status symbols are more important than the man they are attached to. Yes, this does hearken back to our nomadic ancestors as women were in competition to be protected by the strongest provider to ensure survival for the young, but its vestiges (especially when at odds with true feminism) are infuriatingly cruel at times.

Attractive women who have the right to be a little more discerning can be devastating to good or even great men who don't conform to their semi-arbitrary standards of what constitutes a good catch in their eyes. Sometimes class standards are involved, but it can exist at any socioeconomic level.

No 6-figure income? Then there's no chance with her because you can't give her nice things or at least nice things in a way competitive with her friends/rivals.

Have a single action figure in your room and a Star Wars towel in your closet, or go to a Comic-Con once a year with your buddies? You're an immature man-child with no grasp on what's important.

Your dick is under 8 inches long and despite studying tantra you can't go more than 5 minutes? You could never please her sexually.

Anyone see that episode of 30 Rock this week? Tina Fey's character wrote a book about "Dealbreakers" for women to spot in their men. While most of the episode focused on genuinely immature man-boys and legitimate concerns, the opening scene focused on a retail bookseller employee pointing out a passage that says "If your man wears a name-tag and is over 30, that's a dealbreaker." That is the behavior I'm talking about.

Standards are a good thing and a sign of healthy ego, but for god's sake ladies either have a heart when passing on a guy or remember that even "lesser" guys can be surprisingly good partners, but they're only be such if you can give them some room to be themselves.

BinaryShadow · 2009-10-24T04:13:53+00:00

This article is a bit whiney about petty crap. Here's the start of a real list:

"Forgetting" to take their birth-control pills.

Crying rape when they just had a few drinks and had consensual sex that they later regret.

Claiming "emotional abuse" in family courts to steal the kids away from the father.

junkeee999 · 2009-10-24T11:38:57+00:00

[permanently deleted]

rmbarnes · 2009-10-24T10:42:57+00:00

10 They don’t pick up the phone - Move onto the next girl.

9 Use men for free drinks - Don't ever buy woman free drinks to get her into bed. If she wants to sleep with you buying her drinks or not won't make a difference.

8 Use men as placeholders - This is a bit fucked up. What they didn't mention here is that part of the reason they do this is they want you to get more and more upset until you end it. In their eyes you are then responsible for the breakup of the relationship, because you ended it. In order to not give them this satisfaction, just cut them out of your life, but never officially break up with them.

7 Emotionally manipulate men - This does suck. They frequently pull fits just to see how you'll react.

6 Use physical violence - I would say hit them back, but you'll probably end up in prison due to a sexist justice system. Instead dump her, and start spreading rumours amongst people she knows that you dumped her because she was sleeping around and had picked up herpes. This will lead many of her social circle to think she's a slut with no respect for herself, and this will hurt a girl more than a punch.

5 Criticize their men in public - This is just wrong, and she should be called out on it. If she persists she needs to be dumped.

4 They don’t disclose their relationship status - Many times it isn't a woman's intentions to do this just to string you along. She is initially attracted to you, and so she doesn't want to scare you off by saying she has a bf. As the conversation progresses, if she decides she doesn't want to sleep with you (because you didn't continue to attract her) she'll play the bf card. This card is also sometimes played even when she does want to sleep with you. In her eyes if you continue to pursue her after she's dropped the bf bomb, it absolves her of responsibility for cheating.

3 They withhold sex - If she does this for too long feel no shame in openly visiting hookers. That's what they are there for. Alternatively, get another gf.

2 They test their men - I think it's OK to give in every now and again if you love her (this should run both ways though). If she does it too often, don't jump through her hoops.

1 They flirt to inspire jealousy - Two can play at that game. If this really upsets you, dump her very publicly right there and then and call her a slut in front of everyone. Remember, making her social group think of her as a slut is the nuclear option when it comes to women as their social status is so important to them.

Remember, there are billions of women on the planet. Never take to much shit from one of them, there's no need.

masterofshadows · 2009-10-24T03:53:33+00:00

I guess if you are a doormat that site applies

2009-10-24T14:36:25+00:00

askmen.com is owned by News Corp.

Offensive_Brute · 2009-10-24T12:21:53+00:00

*10. Who cares if she doesn't answer the phone, if shes that flakey you don't want to have anything to do with her anyway.

*9. Don't buy women anything until after you stretch out at least one of her holes. if you can't stretch out any of them, shes spent, discard her promptly. Your pecker size has no bearing.

*8. If the bitch isn't meeting your needs, you can assume some one else is meeting hers. Promptly discard.

*7. Never give in to this kind of behavior. In fact have fun with her. If she wants to play head games, play head games. Give her false reactions, so that she will behave one way to illicit one (false) response and another way to illicit another (false) response. This way she thinks she knows how to push your buttons, but in reality she doesn't know a fuckin thing about your feelings, allowing you the upper hand in the relationships emotional battles. When she thinks her plan is going smoothly, because she thinks she can forecast your attitude, you can throw a wrench into her schemes, possibly without her ever knowing that you've done it on purpose.

*6. If your in a relationship where the woman thinks so little of you she is comfortable hitting you, then her actually hitting you is only a symptom of a bigger problem. You're a pussy. I'm not saying that to be mean, I'm saying that because if you fail to establish in some way, verbally or physically, directly or indirectly, that you are at least the physically dominant party in the relationship, you're a pussy. No reasonable woman will argue with this simple statement "I've never hit a woman before, but if you ever see fit to be physically violent toward me, I will beat you like a man, and I will, with my pride and honor in tact, serve my prison sentence with a smile on my face." Make her believe that you are willing and able to be physically violent toward her, and make her believe that you're not afraid of police or judges or prison, and she'll never dare cross that line.

*5. Talk to her about it. If she does it again, punish her the way she'd punish you. Close yourself off to her emotionally. Women really respond to emotional isolation. Maybe because its a trick out of her own playbook. if she doesn't respond to any of that, then dump her ass because she doesn't give a shit about you.

*4. if she doesn't disclose her relationship status its because shes a whore, that will fuck you boyfriend or no boyfriend if your game is tighter than his. Once you catch a girl engaging in this behavior she should be written off for good. Not a friend, not a booty call, certainly not a girlfriend. Nothing.

*3. if she thinks withholding sex is a good idea, then she'll love it when you get up in the middle of the night, get dressed and leave. She has to learn that getting what she wants is all about giving you what you want. The message to get across is withholding sex will result in a direct threat to your relationship. If she's tired or not feeling well, thats fine and dandy, if you've been an asshole and she doesn't wanna fuck because shes mad, thats okay, but simply to get her way? thats not okay.

*2. this is the behavior of an insecure women. Don't give up your plans last minute, but make sure you're making time for her, make sure she knows that you care about her and that you're happy with your relationship. or you give up your plans in exchange for the same favor at some point in the future.

*1. the best way to correct this behavior in my experience is to keep her just a little insecure. You like her, and you like being with her, but you will go elsewhere if you're not given the proper respect. Adopt a pattern of behavior that the Cosmo Magazines will tell her means you might be cheating.

it takes a lot of hard work to keep a bitch in line without hitting, but if shes a good bitch, then your efforts will be rewarded.

CrawstonWaffle · 2009-10-24T15:33:03+00:00

Edit: fucking syntax. I know there's something wrong with the number values on the list. I didn't write them that way. When you put numbers and don't have the entire entry in one paragraph, followed by the next number value on the next line, reddit will make every number the start of a new list. I have to go to work so I'm not going to fix this, but please curtail being clever by pointing out that "Hey, it's all 1!"

Attempting to make a man "fit" to her idea of Prince Charming.

If there's one incongruity I hate about modern women its the idea that for all their progression they all now deserve a Prince to carry them off into his castle where she can start up her small business and supplement his family's endowment and rearrange all his decor.

Again, there's nothing wrong with having standards or even expecting a man to meet some of them once you're together, but a lot of women take this too far.

They eliminate a man's say in taking care of their home, sometimes regardless of his willingness to worth with her and compromise. They attempt to eliminate long standing "boyish" hobbies, interests, or pursuits, and often succeeding save at those most deeply rooted. Wardrobes, diets, brand tastes, even auto preferences and political values are subject to a controlling woman's hand.

And while all of these can actually be good things there is a very clear line where it stops being about the man's betterment and more about the woman's attempt to make the Prince she always wanted out of whatever spare parts are around. You can always spot the guy whose woman has emasculated his sense of identity, but whom he cares about too much to stick up for his own autonomy.

This one is not automatically cruel, but often dependent on the man's inability to be assertive about his own life that makes it so.

While I certainly don't wish to imply that this is all either gender's fault, I do beseech women to remember that their man can be the Prince they never knew they wanted; they just have to be willing to use a light touch and remember that both of them get to make choices.

Using 'abuse' as a manipulation tool.

Now we're getting into more gender-specific territory.

The average Woman can be more emotional than your average Man.

There are so many specific examples of variance it would be insane to explain any further, but oversimplifying to a great degree this is a semi-acceptable standard.

That said, there are women in marriages, at work, in relationships, or even just out in the world who use their natural resonance with powerful emotions to further their own gains. It's little more than an exaggerated form of the child who cries at his mother until he gets ice cream, only many women have found an ability to make this work as adults.

What makes this behavior cruel are when you factor in divorce proceedings. While men are far from perfect and often at legitimate fault in many divorces, the propensity of women and their attorneys to exaggerate the state of their emotional health to "get more" out of their husbands in terms of alimony, child support, and worst of all custody, is reprehensible.

While this behavior often acts as a short-term gain for the woman, in the long-term this makes whatever vestiges of platonic normalcy between the man and woman toxic, reduces the man's state-of-living for decades if not the remainder of his life, and worst of all creates a state in which the children are even more disconnected from male role models in their life.

And that's not even including the spectre of potential physical abuse, which if none occurred can make an innocent man a pariah from men and women alike simply because of what was alleged.

Using pregnancy as a manipulation device.

If sex is the most wonderful thing a man and a woman can do to reaffirm their innate masculine and feminine values (and for homosexual relationships just substitute man and woman with whatever and whatever and leaves the next part out of your mind), then pregnancy is the joyous fruit of that reaffirmation. The man proves his virility and the woman proves her capacity as a nurturer of life, and both are rewarded with a charge that validates one of their deepest natural biological instincts.

Women who use pregnancy as any sort of manipulation tool are truly horrible people.

False pregnancy scares are insanely disconcerting to a man and can take him on a truly devastating emotional roller coaster often causing real social damage.

Using a pregnancy to either 'put the fear of god into' or 'keep around' a man is a sign of extreme emotional immaturity.

Then there are those women who would forget to use birth control or even sperm-jack a man to really get pregnant.

Because of parenting laws the woman gets to unilaterally affect a man's life for a minimum of 18 years. Any woman who does this to keep a man around, or even worse to spite him, has done nothing but created a toxic environment for the three of them AND put serious damage on the child.

The worst part of this cruelty is that it is legally sanctioned to bind the man to the child as long as the woman wants to keep said child, making this one of the cruelest things a woman could do, but it's not the most cruel.

Using Rape as a manipulation device.

Now we're in heavy territory.

Rape is a horrible facet of human existence. It perverts sex and humiliates both genders. You don't need to watch a Lifetime movie to approximate the right emotion reserved for rapists, though doing so helps.

Any woman who claims a man raped her when such is not actually the case is doing something even worse than lying about pregnancy. You see, children can grow up and leave and men can resume some semblance of independence. Alleged rapists have those two words "alleged" and "rapist" haunt them forever.

Sometimes sex isn't always a good idea. Sometimes a relationship ends very badly and the man was a cheating little weasel. Sometimes the divorce attorneys just can't buy that a man with no history of major temper was emotionally or physically abusive to her.

If rape is even considered by a woman as a weapon, then they are making a cruel mockery or every rape victim male and female alike and are awful human beings.

Alleging rape is cruel enough to ruin a man's life, haunting his reputation and ruining his ability to work and interact in many environments, but it's not even the worst.

Using accusatory pedophilia.

See, I told you this last one was gender-neutral, because men can lobby it against women too. But there is a specific wrinkle about women doing this to men that also applies to 9 and 7 on this list.

You see, pedophilia is even worse than "ordinary" rape because "ordinary" implies some loss of innocence prior. Pedophilia involves taking an implicit trust between adult and child and violating it and forever damaging the child's life.

This is truly the neutron bomb in the nuclear arsenal of social weapons women can lobby against men. You see, alleging abuse or rape may destroy a man's reputation and irradiate his social life for decades, but there is a chance that through all the cancerous ostracism he will eventually find his life arable again.

If you use pedophilia against a man and even half-succeed his social reputation is irrevocably altered. He will put put on databases as a person of interest, if nothing else and be forever monitored. He will likely have to move far away and pray that no one from his past is vindictive enough to bring the gossip to him. If his profession involved children in even the most remote of capacities he will be blacklisted and have to change careers.

Because women are often considered by the courts as slightly more vulnerable than men--a poor side effect of warped feminism--men who receive this allegation will spend the rest of their lives being considered guilty until proven innocent. Women, while almost equally screwed, will be given some benefit of doubt; perhaps nothing more than an infinitesimal benefit of doubt, but more than men.

If you made it to the end of this than bravo for your attention, and I hope you enjoyed reading this. If nothing else I wanted to prove that askmen.com have no idea what actual men think are feminine cruelty and I hope that you have learned something too.

Title	The top 10 cruel things women do to men
Author	masterofshadows
Upvotes	16
Comments	26
Date	October 24, 2009 3:45 AM UTC (16 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/9x8gq/the_top_10_cruel_things_women_do_to_men/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/the-top-10-cruel-things-women-do-to-men.1052333 https://theredarchive.com/post/1052333

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