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Guess what day of the year this was published...

maxlvb

September 4, 2021
60 upvotes
/r/MensRights
https://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/wellbeing/parenting/300394861/the-mother-of-all-jobs-the-reality-of-being-a-single-mum
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Post Information
Title Guess what day of the year this was published...
Author

maxlvb

Upvotes 60
Comments 27
Date September 4, 2021 11:55 PM UTC
(4 years ago)
Subreddit Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/pi2g8r/guess_what_day_of_the_year_this_was_published/
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/guess-what-day-of-the-year-this-was-published.1066841
https://theredarchive.com/post/1066841
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Comments

[–]peter_venture 48 points49 points50 points 4 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link

I've noticed that many divorced women identify themselves as a 'single mom'. The original, and dictionary definition of single mom is 'a mother who brings up a child or children alone, without a partner'. Nowadays many of the women using the term are actually just divorced moms, with a dad very much in the picture. They are deceptively using the term to garner sympathy and social media points, and no one ever calls them out on it. Why is this?

[–]rabel111 18 points19 points20 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Interesting point. Single moms are always portrayed as lone martyrs. I suspect it's "victim addiction." The surgical removal of fathers being celebtrated on Father's Day? Only a female journo would think that appropriate.

[–]Broadside_Beers 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Only any journo would. Let’s be honest, gender has nothing to do with it.

We are less than two months away from “toxic masculinity month” otherwise known as “movember”, where everyone can virtue signal for 30 days at how they truly care about mens mental health whilst simultaneously blaming men for it

[–]GrizzlyNZ 8 points9 points10 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

To be fair. Not all single mothers are at fault though.

In my case my mother was the main one having to work hard to feed and support me and my siblings. If it wasn't for her I'd be fucked. My father after my parents divorce didn't really want anything to do with me as he was more fixated on pursuing his own happiness, I haven't spoken to or seen him since.

I hate feminists just as much as any other bloke on here.
But sometimes single mothers can end up being widowed or left alone to raise the child due to no fault of their own. I know of a few guys who were raised by single mothers, and they don't have a relationship with their fathers either as their fathers weren't around to help raise them when they were young.

Although there are plenty of shitty mothers too.

Maybe we need to find ways we can help young boys grow into proper stable, confident and healthy masculine men. Because a lot of boys are growing up without a proper male role model. There's a lot of shitty parents on both sides.

[–]peter_venture 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

All true, but did anyone say that single mothers are at fault? No. Single mothers and single fathers have to do the work of two parents, often under difficult circumstances. Those that do this are admirable indeed.

No, my point is that DIVORCED mothers, who have an ex in the picture who does his part, shouldn't be using the term single mother. It casts them in the same light as those, like your mother, who have to do everything, and do it gladly. It's a "stolen valor' situation, and many, many divorced women use it to make themselves look heroic, when they're just ordinary, or maybe not even that.

Single mothers and divorced mothers don't have the same burdens, and it's presumptuous and self aggrandizing for those who have an active and involved ex to describe themselves as single moms.

[–]GrizzlyNZ 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I didn't say you said all single mothers are at fault. But I hear what you are saying.My intention wasn't to try and put words in your mouth. Sorry for the misunderstanding.

I was just trying to give my own anecdotal experience.

Unfortunately I've noticed there's a lot of bad parents out there, there's a lot of people who were raised without two parents, or who didn't have their mother or father around.

One of my friends grew up in a two parent household, but his father was distant and avoidant most of the time, spent more time working and rarely spent time getting involved with him. That really fucked him up because he never developed a proper father-son relationship, he felt it stunted his growth as a man and hes bitter about to this day because his dad treated him more like an acquaintance than a son.

[–]throwawayincelacc 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Also to be considered is women get full custody far more often. So you’ll see more stories of single mothers than you would single fathers. I can’t comment on your specific case, but anecdotally it’s far more common to see a struggling single mother because they divorced, took full custody even though they can’t support themselves.

[–]GrizzlyNZ 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

My mother had custody of me but she never tried to stop me from seeing my father, she encouraged me to have a relationship with my father. But my father was too busy leading his new life, he ended up finding another woman, he told me one time that I wasn't his responsibility anymore.

There are a lot of shitty fathers too, ones who have no interest in being involved in their fathers lives. I think growing up I always wanted to be around my father. But even when we spent time together, he rarely tried to influence me or teach me proper values of what it means to be a man.

I know of one guy who has full custody of his children, but that's cause his ex wife was a drug addict.

[–]throwawayincelacc 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I know of one guy who has full custody of his children, but that's cause his ex wife was a drug addict.

That dude is still lucky (assuming he even wanted the kids in the first place).

Here it's full custody to the mom by default. Knew a girl with no job and rehab for drugs twice. The kids would tell CPS that the mom took drugs in front of them and most days they had nothing at home to eat, yet she still had full custody just to spite the fathers and take the child support.

The system is fucked. I'm sorry to hear about your fathers. Shittiness is not a gendered trait (no matter how much women say only men can be shitty).

[–]Klutzy_Pride_5644 22 points23 points24 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

If she found it so hard dealing with the kids maybe she should have let the dad have 50% (or 100%) custody. Also, how convenient the end of her marriage was all his fault. Turns out my marriage ended and it was all my fault - I made her sleep with that other guy behind my back for a few years,..... it all makes sense

[–]Embarrassed-Call-925 11 points12 points13 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Her to other man: Now I'm free and we can be together forever!

Other man: About that...yeah I'm not ready for anything...serious. I think it is best we go our separate ways.

Her on Social Media: "ALL MEN ARE TRASH!!!"

[–]maxlvb[S] 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Feminists: Men are trash!

Me: So you believe women are equal to men then?

🤣🤣🤣


Men need feminism like bicycles need fish.

[–]TP_Crisis_2020 13 points14 points15 points 4 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

Often I craved an adult to download to at the end of the day

Yeah, you miss being able to dump your stay at home bullshit onto your man as soon as he walks in the door from supporting your ass.

Tynan considered a chapter on single dads but decided the female experience was unique.

🙄

“If a single dad wants to write a book, then go for it. By the very nature of being a woman, we carry the emotional load for our kids all the time. We don’t switch off when our kids aren’t with us and the research backs that up. We’re still shopping for the birthday presents and organising school holiday camps, even if we’re not with our kids,’’

A.K.A you're just a fucking neurotic mess. Any time I see a woman use that term "emotional load", I know that is just code word for neurotic. I have dealt with that.. her getting mad at me for not getting up when randomly asking me to go smell the milk in the fridge to see if it's bad or not. Asking me to check the mail 40 times a day. Emotional load is just a cop out that women have created to justify dumping their neurotic bullshit on you.

Each night, Casey carries out this nightly routine alone as she’s a single mother. The difference is that the 43-year-old chose this world. She’s what is known as “a single mother by choice”. Eloise was born by IVF: created from her mother’s egg and donor sperm.

Oh jesus fucking christ, this one didn't even have a man at all and she's acting like a damn victim.

[–]maxlvb[S] 14 points15 points16 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

That's right. On Fathers Day here in New Zealand...


Men need feminism like bicycles need fish.

[–]Broadside_Beers 9 points10 points11 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

What a cheeky, spiteful bitch. There’s no way that wasn’t deliberate.

Happy Fathers Day to all you dads out there.

[–]maxlvb[S] 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Trust me it was deliberate on Stuff's part. It's called clickbait journalism... 😉


Women often complain men are not stepping in on their behalf, under the mistaken presumption women are entitled to men's protection.

[–]aigars2 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

No day goes by without victimizing women just because their women.

[–]Angryasfk 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

You forgot the “/s”!

[–]mikesteane 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

Meaning?

[–]maxlvb[S] 8 points9 points10 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

FYI:

Dalrock’s Law of Feminism: Feminism is the assertion that men are evil and naturally want to harm women, followed by demands to men to solve all of women’s problems.

Feminism today is a monolithic ideology demanding conformity in its pursuit of painting women as weak perpetual victims who can't handle facts, objective reality, or personal agency.

The horror of feminism is that it created a whole class called “The Victim Class”. It is not real. It can’t be cured, as long as it defines women as the perpetual victim of men.

Feminism has been so successful at creating a hierarchy of oppression and victimhood that any women who don't view themselves as oppressed lose all value, and their opinions are rejected as worthless. Feminists want equality but they don't ever consider all women as equals.

Mainstream feminism seems to have turned inward instead of outward. The rhetoric is too often concerned with what women can’t do as opposed to what they can do.


The first step in solving the problems with feminism is recognising that feminism is now the problem.

[–]Remzi1993 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

Meanwhile, Islamic countries could use some actual feminism or better yet the whole world could use some humanism and/or egalitarianism.

Look at what is happening right now in Afghanistan with the Taliban shooting at women who are peacefully protesting for equal rights etc..

[–]maxlvb[S] 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

First wave feminism did wonders for women's equality. Now its simply first world rich white feminists that have never faced real oppression, seeking special treatment that is above and beyond what everyone else gets.


Feminism: Equality, when convenient.

[–]Remzi1993 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

Exactly! I would even say till second wave, but third and fourth wave is completely unnecessary. They went extreme which always happens with ideologies who's purpose are gone.

[–]Angryasfk 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

And that’s why they “embrace” all this “intersectionality” and “identity politics” stuff (indeed invented it). It’s to link the struggles of these groups with those of “women” (ie those well off ones seeking further advancement) and justify casting aside those whom feminists see as being in “their way”.

[–]TheConnoissuer 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

This is why I got a vasectomy lol

[–]rabatek 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

It hurts ?

[–]TheConnoissuer 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

More discomfort than anything. Recovery is going very well. It hurt way worse when I ripped my knee open while snowboarding

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