How to act when giving my ex back his cat?

posprov · 2020-12-08T00:40:22+00:00

What about alternative option, such as informing him that you’re arriving, leaving the cat on the doorstep (I presume you will take it in a cage) and keep your distance while checking he opens the door/takes the cat inside. You could use covid as an excuse as to why you won’t enter his home.

Another alternative could be doing the same thing but him coming to collect it from you. From the doorstep only; surely he doesn’t really need to come indoors? You would have everything prepared/boxed up (idk much about the logistics of cat ownership).

Another alternative could be sending the cat to a cattery and then have him collect it? Might cost you but may be worth it to avoid seeing him. Thinking laterally here.

Regardless to what you choose, defo have your mom take you. The friend may make things difficult e.g. wanting to stop and chat with your ex.

All the best! You’ve got this!

super_thinker_ · 2020-12-07T22:16:02+00:00

I'm sorry you're going through this sis. You sound like the most amazing person ever.

I think you should have your mom drive you and help you carry everything into his house. Hold your head up high and be cordial. Keep it short and quick.

And just know that it's ok to breakdown. My guess is that this will be a rollercoaster of emotion for you and it's ok to cry. Make sure to have some good food and a good movie waiting for you when you get home ❤

Summerisle7 · 2020-12-08T15:16:06+00:00

Can’t your friend just take the cat to him? Why do you need to come along for the ride at all?

Buckley92 · 2020-12-08T04:24:57+00:00

I wouldn't have your mom drive you. Have your friend take the cat in, in a cage. Tell your friend you'll sit outside in the car, and just go on FDS until she's done. If she asks you why you won't do it, just say, 'You're his friend, I'm not, I'm not comfortable with it, if you're wanting to stay and chat with him anyway, I'd rather you do it.' If he comes out and asks to talk to you, ask him, What is it? And if it's about anything non move/cat related, say no, not interested, leave me alone. If he won't, put on headphones (full noise canceling headphones, not just earbuds, they send a stronger message). If you don't have any and can't afford any, BORROW SOME. I would NOT enter his place unless it is absolutely necessary, if he's a LVM, he could stop you from leaving until you 'agree to have a chat'. Put your friend under STRICT instructions to make sure the environment is safe for the cat, incl making sure there's a fence and it can't easily escape. Discuss keeping the cat locked inside for three weeks in advance over text with ex before you go so it doesn't come back to your place.

Title	How to act when giving my ex back his cat?
Author	canadiangirl1564
Upvotes	48
Comments	7
Date	December 7, 2020 9:40 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askFDS
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/AskFDS/comments/k8q6g9/how_to_act_when_giving_my_ex_back_his_cat/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askFDS/how-to-act-when-giving-my-ex-back-his-cat.1067797 https://theredarchive.com/post/1067797

Comments