Please make your mind if you agree or disagree before I tell you the gender of the subject and the gender of the person that said this :D

So, here I was at a early dinner with a casual date among a lot of strong opinionated women. Conversation flows, the strong independent women were recalling all their dating stories, the reasons why men are shit and focus comes round to me and my female friend, and we tell everyone how we met, basically a dating app that matches by personality.

When I get separated by my date one such a strong woman confronts me with the host to tell me she does not approve of me dating a feminine gentile attractive girl. And I ask her does she not want a gentle man that is respectful and kind - what is wrong with me selecting a date based on personality ahead of time? I am just avoiding incompatibility issues without having to put people through the process of a stale awkward date or test for submissiveness, kindness or chemistry across a few dates and raise expectations.

She huffs and puffs and tries to argue that all persons (yes, she used that term) - deserve a shot and it's hurtful to expect people to behave a certain way under threat of ghosting or leaving. And that I am a horrible person to test for those things and because of men like me, women are insecure and suffering.

At this point I was genuinely struggling to not laugh out loud with tears and even the host a common friend was dumbfounded by her lack of self awareness given that she was literally yelling to the whole room at how picky she is and how she has dozens of tests for the men she meets, from whether they wear a shirt from a quality fabric or if they have tissues in their car.

The lady is 40, and she is a successful business woman that traveled to 3 continents this year. A perfect catch if any of you eligible high value men want a strong independent woman by your side, this upcoming year.

Now, what do you think? Despite our obvious disagreements in terms of high value - I do agree with her. Testing people is a defense mechanism and if you are willing to test someone, you don't actually like that person enough to be in a relationship with them, otherwise you would just green flag everything and not have any doubts. And I agree, feeling the the tested party, having to fight to win someone's affections is cruel and makes you insecure. What do you all think?

And happy new year! Here's to another fun year of arguing over relationships and personal choices :D