- Word Ahead:

This post was originally called Unpopular Opinion: Neither women nor men are the prize in the relationship, but the mods took it down as the title was not neutral enough to be kept going under the current community guide lines. u/Mrs_Drgree, confirmed I can repost this under this new title, which was initially the TLDR for the old post.

- Actual topic:

Red Pill/MGTOW/etc is wrong when they say men are the prize. They aren't, but neither are the women. None of the genders are the prize inside a relationship !!!

The family lifestyle is the prize. And the glue that keeps family in it for the long haul are children.

The act of raising children is an act which lasts 18-20 years (minimum per child) and is the baptism by fire in which couples are affirmed as life partners to themselves and the world.

The main reward of the family lifestyle involve having a trustworthy life partner, with whom you can share life burdens (this is true for both genders), on top of everything else each member of the couple brings to the table.

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Obviously, this has changed immensely due to the attacks on the institutions of family, marriage and childcare, as well as against the concepts of: masculinity and femininity by the hedonistic advocates of what is today considered the modern society.

If women were indeed the prize, then we wouldn't have monogamy and any woman would suffice for the purpose of procreation.

Truth of the matter is, both men and women are born with inherent value and that value is determined by the family they are born in!

The values men and women develop prior to legal marrying age can be a plus, but in medieval times and societies with caste systems, you would not see the 4th son of duke marry the 2nd daughter of the baker, unless extraordinary circumstances occur (public shaming or lovers defying social norms to the point where the relationship is officialised in law to the detriment of others).

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As a point of reference I'd like to direct everyone towards Ion by Liviu Rebreanu, where you have 2 instances of cross social class marriages.

We have the marriage between Ion, the main character of this book (who is born in a family of generational poverty) and Ana, daughter of a very rich man in his area and the marriage of George (rich guy) with Florica (peasant girl).

The reactions differ due to circumstances, but Toma (George's father), would have been upset at his son's choice to marry a peasant girl, if not for the fact that his wealth was large enough to survive having one son (out 4 I think, can't remember exactly how many boys he had) not to commit to a marriage of convenience with another rich girl to increase the family fortune further.

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Meanwhile, Ion changed his status from a broke peasant born in failure and destined to failure to a wealthy man, by seducing and marrying Ana, which in turn also served to enrage her father to no end.

From the perspective of Ana's father, she screwed up the family's potential for wealth by marrying into a poor family of bad repute, due to Ion's father being a dead beat and a lazy drunk.

Ana's father also ignored the fact that Ion was one of the hardest working men in the village, had one of the best work ethics and was the exact opposite of his father (a drunk and a lazy bum).

However Ion could never escape the shadow of his family - a family of generational poverty, for which he was always disrespected by other young male villagers who could match his work ethic.

For Ion, an arranged marriage with a wealthy girl was the only way to erase the failure of his ancestors and have his fame match his work ethic. Sadly, the bad things he had to do to inherit the wealth of Ana's family had left a strong yearning for true love inside Ion, which in the end, gets him murdered.

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In medieval times the act of marriages for the purpose of increasing wealth and influence were common everywhere in real life and I am sure other redditors can provide other examples.

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To consolidate my point, I would like to provide a realistic hypothetical situation using modern day examples:

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We have an average guy, let's call him Leo and he is a middle class man coming from a middle class family. His dad is a car mechanic and his wife is a math teacher.

Leo knows 2 women, Amanda and Bethany, both are average looking and are what red pilllers would consider unicorns (low body counts and the desire to raise a traditional family)

Amanda's dad is a lawyer, while her mom works part time as a receptionist.

Bethany's dad is an upper manager at a big company and make's enough money to allow his wife to be a stay at home mom.

Leo wants to be a dad, he doesn't fancy anyone in particular, but both Amanda and Bethany have expressed interest in a long term relationship with him.

Both dads have meet and are ok with Leo and his family. Regardless of who Leo marries, the in laws will gain the benefit of having Leo's dad help them out with car problems.

If Leo's relationship with Amanda would result in marriage, he would gain a father in law, who could help him out with legal problems in case of an emergency and who could provide some level of mentorship for his children to become lawyers.

If Leo's relationship with Bethany would result in marriage, he would gain a father in law who could help both him and his children enter the corporate sector and ensure a good career path for his entire family via generational corporate connections.

I think everyone will have different opinions on whether Leo should get together with either Amanda or Bethany, but this example proves that family wealth is an important value in determining dating and marriage market value.

TL,DR:

Value on the dating market is inherited from family and then enhanced by personal achievements and development.

MGTOW, Red Pill, current iteration of feminism are WRONG. Neither women nor men are the prize in the relationship. Their children are the prize, as they are inheritors of the legacies of both parrents.

I also do also acknowledge that in many happy cases, these type of relationships have enriched the lives of individuals with a life long partner which they can trust with just about anything.