MensRights, my father-in-law is being abused. How can I help him see this?

Popeychops · 2013-08-19T23:43:26+00:00

Record the events. Every time he's struck, every time you hear her insult him, any truth that he won't admit is occurring. Then confront him with the records after about a month. It that won't convince him, go to social services and report him as vulnerable.

roharareddit · 2013-08-19T22:50:32+00:00

Have you talked to your spouse about this?

CosmicKeys · 2013-08-20T10:20:53+00:00

Hi OP, very sorry to hear about your situation. One option might be a site like shrink4men, lots of advice there and it has a support forum for men that have dealt with abusive women. Whereever you are, I suggest looking at your local DV resources and find a number that he can call for advice.

Above all, talk with him and be there for support, remind him that there are other options he can take to get out.

rightsbot · 2013-08-19T21:56:17+00:00

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avantvernacular · 2013-08-20T14:18:48+00:00

Here's the thing, you've got to get him to press charges against her, but no one will believe him without an overwhelming amount of evidence. And I do mean a lot, boxes and boxes full. Otherwise, she'll just turn it around and say that he abused her and he'll end up being the one arrested. Record phone conversations, take time stamped photos of bruises, document everything.

Unfortunately this means he'll have to endure a lot more abuse as you collect evidence, but the police simply will not believe you without it and won't investigate it themselves. Depending on jurisdiction, that may actually be required to believe what your mother in law says and arrest your father in law, so on top of the abuse, he'll probably spend some time in lock up.

Things will get a lot worse before it gets better, but unfortunately, there's really no other way to do anything about it.

Also, be sure any shelter you send him to doesn't practice the Duluth model.

BalllsackTBaghard · 2013-08-20T15:37:40+00:00

You are truly your brother's keeper, but sometimes it takes more than will to shepherd the weak through the valley of darkness, sometimes it takes a little magic. Slip him some LSD and make him experience the Light.

Title	MensRights, my father-in-law is being abused. How can I help him see this?
Author	pigbaboy
Upvotes	36
Comments	10
Date	August 19, 2013 9:54 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/1koxnm/mensrights_my_fatherinlaw_is_being_abused_how_can/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/mensrights-my-father-in-law-is-being-abused-how.1165945 https://theredarchive.com/post/1165945

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