Women CAN have it all, as long as men are willing to lean out.

ExpendableOne · 2013-07-08T15:14:11+00:00

You know what bugs me about a lot of these articles about how often it's framed as "men should learn to be okay with not being financial providers", as if men were the problem, as if there aren't already men like that out there and as if men had any power to change things. Truth is they completely seem to fail to take into consideration that this is generally not a viable path for men and that the data they collect to make their argument is completely biased, ignorant and off-base. It's like they will take a hundred women, who have chosen the men they are with specifically because of their drive, ambitions and capabilities as providers, and then just come to the conclusions that no men would ever be okay with being a stay-at-home father because those men aren't. Basically cherry-picking their own sub-demographic, and then making a call against all men based on that sub-demographic(it would be like men choosing to only date pornstars, and then complaining that not enough of women are pursuing legitimate careers).

The fact is, there are certainly a lot of men out there who are better suited for supportive roles, and who would be fine with those roles, but those men are, far more often than not, simply ruled out for being "effeminate" or "deadbeats" by the vast majority of women. Ambitious women seek, first and foremost, other ambitious and successful men who would be able to provide them the opportunity to stop working and become stay-at-home moms, without sacrificing their lifestyle should they ever choose to do so. A man that openly admits being willing, or desiring, to be a stay-at-home father when meeting women would be immediately dismissed or laugh at, if not immediately lose points for it in terms of sexual/romantic desirability.

dungone · 2013-07-08T14:35:16+00:00

It doesn't seem like that bad of an article from a female perspective. It admits some very hard truths.

But from a male perspective, it's hard to agree to "lean out" when it's hard enough to find a decent woman as it is, let alone one who will marry you or even merely have sex with you if you don't earn good money. Just how many men can afford to give up their careers when 3 out of 4 women don't even want to work? And feminists do their best to deprive men of parental rights, so that doesn't help. So from men's perspective it's not a relationship issue, it's a social issue.

Clauderoughly · 2013-07-08T14:30:29+00:00

Women can have it all as long as men support them.

thrownaway_MGTOW · 2013-07-08T19:12:37+00:00

[permanently deleted]

ImAPurplePrincess · 2013-07-08T21:58:49+00:00

But finding a partner who supports that ambition can be difficult (and I mean really supports it; too many studies have shown that career-minded women in dual-income marriages still end up with the majority of responsibilities in maintaining the home and rearing the kids).

That hits too close to home. Both my parents decided to go to work and go to school at the same time. It became obvious that one parent had to drop school so the other could pursue their career. (because of financial reasons) My dad decided to drop his classes and let my mom pursue her degree. And yet, at the end of the day he still expected her to make dinner every night...

Obviously, as my siblings and I got older, we helped around the house so she can spend all her free time studying. And my dad picked up extra hours to pay for my mom's classes. But it was definitely a rough first couple of semesters for the whole family.

giegerwasright · 2013-07-08T17:36:42+00:00

Harrison Bergeron. Read it.

Arby01 · 2013-07-08T18:12:04+00:00

My god, this person gets paid for their writing? It's nearly incoherent.

Sandberg is writing for that 25 percent, and making those women who are not in that 25 percent (either by choice or because they don’t have the income for the drivers and nannies and the support of their partner) because they have made the same “choice” that she did.

Making those women ... what? Where's the rest of the damn sentence?

And, of course, our technology isn’t doing women or men when it comes to balancing work and play and family.

Well, in certain videos I am sure technology does women or men but I am not really convinced that is what he was talking about.

2013-07-09T02:48:58+00:00

Their logic: for me to excel in the workplace environment I need you to do worse in it! You will be sexist if you don't "lean out" for me either.

2013-07-08T16:21:04+00:00

I think we need to find a way to stop men from supporting women like this. We need to shame men and deride them for supporting their wives careers while they(the men) sit around doing their nails and eating bonbons and shit!

What has become of us ?!?!?!

Title	Women CAN have it all, as long as men are willing to lean out.
Author	CopeWrites
Upvotes	45
Comments	31
Date	July 8, 2013 1:56 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/1hv3by/women_can_have_it_all_as_long_as_men_are_willing/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/women-can-have-it-all-as-long-as-men-are-willing.1169263 https://theredarchive.com/post/1169263

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