"Are you mad?" from LTR

ReddJive · 2017-10-31T14:45:25+00:00

I love how everyone is giving the set boundaries speech. What does this mean exactly? You going to sit her and every girl in your life down and go over your list of dos and don’ts? You set boundaries by your actions.

You intentionally buried the lead here. I only found out what happened as I read further down so clearly you are pissed becasue you didn’t want to admit to what went on. So what? I would be. Any man would be. Admit it. Own your shit. There is nothing wrong in being pissed what is wrong is letting it guide your actions from here on out.

OK so your girl just proved to you exactly where she places the relationship and more importantly you. She kept it secret until the end becasue she had a feeling you would react badly. True or not she didn’t have faith in your nor your Alpha status. And it shows.....you’ve quickly and coldly established new behavior. Remember women are fucking brilliant at covert communications. She knows you’re pissed.

ANd no she doesn’t think she fucked up. She’s setting you up. The guise is that she wants to show you that these guys aren’t really into her BUT there will be shit testing, and a lot of gaming going on.

If you have really established your Alpha cred with her she would have been doing acts to prove that she isn’t interested in the validation she gets from these orbiters. She’d be showing up and doing things for you. Not just sex, but other acts or even setting up a private date with you.

The only response here is.

“No thanks not into foursomes. Have fun on your date.”

htbf · 2017-10-31T16:51:53+00:00

There is not point explaning anything to her. There is no point in holding a grudge.

You're not mad at her, you're mad at yourself for being unable to resolve this. You're mad at yourself for how difficult it would be for you to let her go.

You don't have to let her go but you have to be prepared to do it. So just sit her down and let her know that if she does this shit again, your relationship is over. Don't explain more, don't defend, don't argue. If she starts to argue like ("that's manipulative", "i dont want to be controlled", etc), you say "fine" and you end the relationship then and there.

Any other way around it lessens your respect for yourself.

Kommanderdude · 2017-10-31T13:27:48+00:00

Hard to say without the details. If it has anything to do with a ex or beta orbiter and you are angry about it. You’ll look butt hurt no matter what and should just end because you would have driven her to the other guy with your insecurity.

Please tell us what’s going on so we can help you more.

Retspihi · 2017-10-31T14:12:31+00:00

You didn't set boundaries, next. Relationship is over.

Kommanderdude · 2017-10-31T14:49:48+00:00

If you fess up to being pissy because she went out with a guy friend you’ll only look like a insecure loser beta and you’ll lose. Just keep up with being distant and agree and amplify. If she specifically calls you out on this as why you are mad then play it off in a joking way and hold frame. If her hanging out with guy friends is a deal breaker for you then end it.

You need to work on yourself more. This whole thing is you just being butt hurt because you lack abundance.

youcantdenythat · 2017-10-31T14:50:56+00:00

"I'm busy"

Cloud1995 · 2017-10-31T13:14:33+00:00

dump her

Peter_B_Long · 2017-10-31T23:56:42+00:00

All 3 of those responses are trash. Just don't respond to her for a while longer and reply with a, "hey what's up" like nothing happened.

Your distance and withdrawal should be enough of a listen to her to not do whatever she did. That's how you set your boundary.

Pork_Sword3 · 2017-11-01T12:06:44+00:00

After absorbing knowledge of TRP, I love setting boundaries with women while I’m dating them. There’s nothing more hilarious when they start pushing a boundary, (especially when you’re together in person and they know their actions would disqualify them for a LTR) when they look to see for a reaction and all I’ll give them is stone cold eye to eye contact to which they immediately look away in a submissive way, then I’ll leave wherever we are/take them home/or kick them out of my house and withdraw complete attention and affection for a few days. (or forever if it was worthy of a hard next) After that it’s astonishing how quick they are to say things like “are you mad?” “Did I do something wrong” “why aren’t you talking to me, your such an asshole” “you’ve changed” because they KNOW they fucked up and their hamster is going nuts. Then when you lift the soft next to see them again, they come up to you like a wounded puppy and you can literally make them do anything for you and how they will give you the best sex you’ve ever had with them all because they want what you took away from them. Your time, attention and affection. It’s amazing what a real IDGAF attitude combined with genuine body language to tell a woman “you’ve just made me care a whole lot less about you” can do for you and make a woman realise what boundaries she dare not step over. There’s not a single woman I’ve dated after coming across TRP that I’ve actually had to verbally communicate my boundaries to. OP, as many have mentioned on here. Get on the sidebar; it’s where I started and it’s improved my life immensely. It’ll do the same for you.

VasiliyZaitzev · 2017-10-31T16:57:43+00:00

Out of curiosity, how old are you and she? Sometimes, girls need to learn things, so if you're sophomores in HS, then it's one thing, if you're 21 it's something else. I'm guessing young, but not including the fact pattern in the OP made it pretty useless, and you should probably do an edit.

Incidentally, this shit is why I advocate for men to maintain sexual relationships with multiple women, so you don't wind up with this bullshit.

It pissed me off because she didn't say anything and told me AFTER the movie.

It pissed you off, because you have given her "commitment" and she acted like it was nothing.

It's her first relationship, she has a good family, loves both of her parents, is smart and texts always first and is feminine in a good way.

She needs a "Code Red" and boundaries need to be set.

She lets me be the captain.

So who was the captain on her double date?

I think she realized her mistake pretty quick and asked me to go out for some drinks on friday with those said 2 guys and her friend. I said I'll see if I'll manage to come.

If it were me, I'd say, "Yeah, I don't need to meet anyone involved in this clusterfuck. You need to spend some time thinking about what you did."

TRP_mask · 2017-10-31T13:08:18+00:00

Confront her with why you're angry. Best to do it in person though. You are the one leading, so if she does something that pisses you off, you tell her. You show her that she can't do that with you and that you're not afraid to tell her how you feel about it, and she'll respect you for it. However, if you keep being angry via texting you show weakness.

Talking about your problems is obviously not the TRP way, but I think everyone agrees that when you have problems with each other but both of you don't know about it, you'll lose each other. The key is to put them on the table while still holding frame and staying dominant.

nofilmynofucky · 2017-10-31T17:59:04+00:00

Sick of these basic ass questions tbh. Side bars right fuckin there man

freestyler2k1 · 2017-10-31T13:49:46+00:00

Reframe The Situation! Ask her to come over and fuck her Brain out!

stillah · 2017-10-31T14:31:59+00:00

LTR

there's your problem. why the fuck are you in a relationship?

Title	"Are you mad?" from LTR
Author	ImParadox
Upvotes	8
Comments	24
Date	October 31, 2017 12:59 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/79vjxb/are_you_mad_from_ltr/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/are-you-mad-from-ltr.117338 https://theredarchive.com/post/117338

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