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[–]1atticusfinch1973 7 points8 points9 points 7 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I would take a bullet for her and I love her because I love her, not because she makes me feel wanted or comfortable.
This is definitely not the right way to approach any relationship you expect to last long term.
Am I truly just a comfort blanket providing stability while she gets her shit together?
You need to take your rose coloured glasses off and realize that yes, this is the case.
I can't go months without fucking while she can
Do you seriously think she's going months without male attention? I'm not saying she's cheating, but women crave attention like cocaine.
In short, you have asked the right questions and simply need to actually hear the right answers.
[–]golfinguru111 point 7 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Jesus Christ the comfort blanket stuff scares me. The glasses are off now though, thank you for that.
I don’t doubt she craves male attention, she has her orbiters. I also don’t think she has cheated, but the fact that it’s subject to change is something to always be aware of.
[–]guez87 4 points5 points6 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
If she leaves you, find a younger, more beautiful one that lasts more years before the wall.
[–]1VisiblePlan 6 points7 points8 points 7 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
Women can't love men the way we want to love them. And we can't really them that way either. Thats because romantic love is a fanciful concept thought up to try and denormalize sex and make pussy more valuable, the idea that you have to do this, this, and this in order to get laid. she might not dump you right away my friend, but if you stagnate as she improves, she will absolutely find something better.
[–]golfinguru110 points 7 years ago [recovered] (7 children) | Copy Link
Isn't there a biological purpose to love inducing pair bonding in order to successfully raise offspring? Romantic love may not exist in the way Disney portrays it, but being faithful to a partner whom you care deeply for is an expression of love in my opinion.
[–]FederalAnxiety 5 points6 points7 points 7 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
There's a biological purpose to hypergamy as well. Back to when we were living in caves, cave woman Jane likes alpha cave man Bob, but then cave man Jim comes and unseats cave man Bob as the new alpha. Cave man Jim gives better odds of child surviving, so her "love" must switch.
Men never have that problem because we don't rely on women for protection or resources. Our problem was making sure that the kids we raised were ours. That's why today's women are disgusted by betas, while today's men are disgusted by sluts.
If you really don't believe AWALT, think about this: how many women have you ever met who are honestly attracted to weak and powerless men? There are no exceptions. All women want a man that's stronger and more competent than them. That means they have very strict conditions on their love. Likewise we have similar conditions (see all the posts on relationship advice saying "my darling wife of 10 years just told me she had 100 sex partners before me and now I can't look at her").
Men come in a huge variety, gay, straight, dominant, submissive. With women those exceptions are vanishingly rare, and you have no way of knowing if she's an exception or not until it's too late.
[–]golfinguru111 points 7 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
This is the most well thought out response I’ve received. The last sentence is so goddamn poignant, you really wouldn’t know until it is too late.
My only question then is, what’s the solution? How do you wife and impregnate a woman who you know could throw it all away at any time, even if she never acted in that way before? It seems such an important decision to just risk knowing the hypergamous psychology of women.
[–]1VisiblePlan 0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Most on TRP say not to get married for precisely that reason.
[–]1VisiblePlan 1 point2 points3 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Do you think ur dog loves you, it's pretty faithful. Women are like dogs, they are fine as long as you feed them, but if they find better food, they'll go towards that.
[–]Battagliare 0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
You are talking about oxytocin, and oxytocin pathways gets fucked once a girl has way too many partners. Basically in this current setting where women have sex with so many different partners, their brain chemicals are getting fucked so oxytocin becomes obsolete.
This is really harsh i know, but West asked for it.
[–]Robster25 2 points3 points4 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You won't like what I'm going to say, but from what you wrote I would say she is probably already cheating on you.
My long distance girlfriend has a pretty face, big blue eyes, big tits and a heart of gold. She could be at least an 8 if she lost 30 pounds, as could I if I did the same.
That means she is a 6 or a 7, which means that there are guys out there, who she considers hot and fuckable. If she would be an 8, 9 or 10 (is this even possible?) her standards would be much higher, because women don't date/seldomly fuck down. And if she has a pretty face and big tits, guys will be attracted to her, even if she isn't a bikini model weight-wise.
My sex drive is higher than hers (I can't go months without fucking while she can) and she is cool with me having one night stands, of which I have had a couple. I asked her if she wanted to do the same and she correctly answered that she has no interest
So you think...Of course she would say she has no interest. The only time a woman says she is interested in an open relationship is, when she brings it up, otherwise she wouldn't admit to openly sleeping around.
If she loses weight and becomes more attractive before I do, does she all of a sudden flip a switch and dump me?
I don't think she would dump you. You are too much of a good provider from what you said, but she will probably cheat on you, if she didn't already.
If you say that she can un-love me because another, better love appears in the wild like a goddamn pikachu, I am forced to conclude that this whole fucking relationship thing is pointless.
Congratulations. You have been on this forum for more than 2 years and now you finally realize that relationships are pointless from a man's perspective. As another commenter pointed out: Men and women love differently. She will dump you without hesitation, if she believes she found a better option, which totally makes sense. Why would you want to pair-bond and raise children with the second best option? I wouldn't want to do it either. So the only thing you can do, to keep her around is to be the best version of yourself you can be (= the best option for her, but you can still be dumped if your best isn't good enough).
I believe you need to get burned some more to learn about female nature, you are way to naive. Sorry to be that hard on you.
[–]TheImpossible1 5 points6 points7 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Girls in LDRs are cheating.
2 shadowbans here. What's going on?
[–]cuztrp 1 point2 points3 points 7 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
You and I are going through the same existential dilemma, my friend. I'm currently suffering from these thoughts and after much thought and consideration, I've come to the conclusion that the nowadays Western model of relationships is fucker on so many levels and is more like a conflict that two people just getting together and enjoying the love of their lives.
I'm pretty sure what I'm about to say is swag but hear me out and always be reminded that these facts are pieces of truth and they all establish the bitter harsh reality that we all exist in...
First of all, you well know that women are hypergamous af.. it's something they themselves don't even fully comprehend. The shit that goes in their heads is evolutionary and operates on an unconscious deep psychobiological level. A girl will never understand why she would be catching feelings for a jacked guy and fuck him while she has a sweet loving boyfriend.
Girls are psychologically unstable and are insecure about so many things about themselves and most importantly, they're indecisive. Trust me on this. If they happen to bump into a guy with a cold ass frame who, using kino and all TRP tricks lures her into sex, she will fuck him even if she's married.
I have a personal bitter experience with this. I was TRPed to the brim, attractive, good game and constantly increasing SMV. I met an exchange student in the university, gamed her right and kissed on the first date. Saw her couple weeks after at my place and we fucked both knowing that we're committing a mistake. She has a boyfriend back home. The cheating went for 2 months until she broke and we had the talk after which she callously broke with her boyfriend for me and sucked my dick on the same fucking day (hypergamy is merciless).
We're officially in a relationship and my SMV started dropping steadily. I went through many depressing shit and her mind games only worsened everything. We had a couple of fights, suspected her of cheating, and amidst all of this, her pussy of an ex comments on her traveling Instagram pictures. The bitch responds with "I wish you were there..."
I see this and my heart breaks. Told her it's inappropriate and she should fucking do smth to mend it. She apologized, told me she felt happy he still thinks about her, and all calmly asks for a break from our relationship... During which, she's hitting her beta plan B ex and then will break up with me. Just. Like. Fucking. That.
All the nice times we had together, all the special moments, travels, gifts and everything in between means nothing. Her hypergamy finally deemed me unfit and she's dropping me like a used condom.
Men love idealistically. Women love opportunistically. Hypergamy doesn't give two flying fucks about your well-being. Women think what they feel, not the other way around. Right now, she feels that she doesn't love and regrets dropping her pussy ex for me, and she staunchly thinks she's been feeling this way the entire relationship.
I'm 100% positive my friend that your princess if bumped into the right guy who would game her right and is attractive enough to seduce her, she would literally fuck him in a heartbeat. It's not easy to internalize because it is harsh but I saw this firsthand my friend and while she was riding my cock and sucking it, I swear to you I felt so bad for the other guy. I saw women for who they are.
You and I came to the same conclusion: LTRs are pointless. You can't maintain an LTR no matter how hard you try. Thousands and thousands of examples on this subreddit of men playing by the book and doing everything right yet getting dumped because the good old monstrous hypergamy deemed them unfit.
You can't possibly come to this conclusion until you finally experience the other facet of hypergamy. It will hurt you and you will learn from it. Then the person you will love the most will be yourself, and girls will only be used for casual sex and to kill time and have fun. That ability to genuinely care for someone and love them will disappear once the charm is dispelled.
[–]golfinguru112 points 7 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
It’s almost like the vastness of the universe, something so foreign that your mind can not comprehend it until you actually experience it. Since I haven’t been burned by hypergamy nor been able to visualize how big the universe is, I guess I will just sit here waiting to be torched. Fun stuff.
[–]cuztrp 0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It feels cozy and warm that you can feel her soft skin and make her moan while you're having sex, doesn't it? Your confidence boosts once she starts licking your balls and giving you the attention that a high-value man deserves. You feel confident, careless and on top of the world. You feel special and psychologically balanced. That's hypergamy working in your favour.
Wait until life hits you with all it got like it did to me bro. You think your girlfriend is your best friend? Someone who would stand by your side and lift you up when things go awry? You're mistaken my friend. When you start dwindling, she will leave you once a better option steps in, even if it's a beta bux with no game. Then you will learn that the only person you should so idealistically love and revere is yourself and bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks.
I just learnt my lesson, man. I completely dropped the notion of finding a significant other and I'm pretty sure I will be banging chicks ane hanging out with them doing all the fun stuff all the time. But that sense of idealism of having the perfect partner and leading that happy life with someone you truly love and appreciate is completely gone from my mind. I will still be attracted to girls, I'll probably get attached to them but never ever promise commitment and never ever enter a fucking LTR again. It's as pointless as pissing in the wind.
As for marriage, that's a big question mark for me man. I honestly don't know how I'll be handing that shit. But I'm still young early twenties and I'll only be thinking of marriage in my early mid thirties.
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[–]Sumsar01 0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
She might if she think she can get a lot higher quality male. AWALT means she has the capacity. Not that she will. But if she outgrow your smv by a lot the chance is higher.
[–]modTheRedPike[M] [score hidden] 7 years ago stickied comment (0 children) | Copy Link
Move to asktrp.
[–]1TheLegionnaire00 -1 points0 points1 point 7 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
How the fuck are you reading TRP since 2016 and still asking this questions?
[–]golfinguru110 points 7 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
Because I found someone whose actions have demonstrated their diversion from the “awalt” theory. I’m coming to the conclusion that just because it hasn’t happened YET doesn’t mean it won’t, and in fact at some point it almost certainly will. The ticking time bomb aspect is the scariest part.
[–]1TheLegionnaire00 0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That's the point. AWALT, as much as you would like to have found an unicorn, you didn't, most probably it's your mind that wishes the unicorns were real so you just create an image for yourself that your gf is not like the other girls. That's bullshit. Remember AWALT! And yes, it's a ticking bomb, better be away, or protected when the explosion start.
[–]PierceTheEye -1 points0 points1 point 7 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
She is fine with you having one night stands? She's a fucking idiot.
She’d rather I didn’t have them. It is a temporary compromise to keep me devoted - the assurance being that I don’t see any one girl again after the one night stand.
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[–]1atticusfinch1973 7 points8 points9 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]golfinguru111 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]guez87 4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]1VisiblePlan 6 points7 points8 points (8 children) | Copy Link
[–]golfinguru110 points [recovered] (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]FederalAnxiety 5 points6 points7 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]golfinguru111 points [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]1VisiblePlan 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]1VisiblePlan 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Battagliare 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Robster25 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheImpossible1 5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]cuztrp 1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]golfinguru112 points [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]cuztrp 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Sumsar01 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]modTheRedPike[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]1TheLegionnaire00 -1 points0 points1 point (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]golfinguru110 points [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]1TheLegionnaire00 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]PierceTheEye -1 points0 points1 point (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]golfinguru111 point [recovered] | Copy Link