Hi my (30F) boyfriend (40) introduced me to RPW a few months ago and I'm still relatively new to all of this. I'm not sure if this is the right forum, but I have a few questions regarding boundaries and communicating with the opposite sex and figured I'd pose it here.

Before we started dating, as much as I'd like to deny it, even though I was single for a few years, I did exhibit promiscuous behavior and had a very liberal approach to sex and dating in general. I was by no means conservative and was more or less a party girl. Because of this, my boyfriend thinks it's extremely important for me to create extremely clear and firm boundaries with the opposite sex, particularly anyone I've had any sexual history with, both from past committed relationships or more fwb/casual situationships. He has also expressed that he wants me to cut off contact with some exes, particularly those I've had casual rather than committed relationships with, arguing that these men did not respect me, or with any guys who've shown any interest in the past. He refers to them as orbiters. While I generally have no issues with this, there are some guys that I genuinely don't think are a threat to our relationship and we were effectively just friends with benefits at some point. There is no flirting or inappropriate conversation and it's very general and infrequent.

If any males contact me, he expects me to immediately let them know I'm in a relationship so that they don't think they're communicating with the old single version of me. We also have a policy where we agreed to let each other know when anyone from the opposite sex reaches out, to create a habit of transparency and accountability in our relationship. However, there are some scenarios where I feel like this may not be absolutely necessary and I see it more as an insecurity/control issue on his part. For example, if a guy texts me about something specific and I just don't feel like announcing my relationship status is relevant to the particular convo. Another example is if a guy compliments me on social media, such as saying "You're beautiful", my default is to either ingore or say "Thanks" and keep it moving, but again, he thinks I need to apply this principle across the board and to let them know I'm in a relationship immediately, but I do feel awkward announcing it just like that sometimes. I do agree with him for the most part, but I think some situations just don't require any energy from me because they are no threat whatsoever.

I feel silly asking this, but am I being inconsiderate in thinking he's just being insecure or controlling? Is it really necessary for me to tell every guy who contacts me that I'm in a relationship immediately? Do I really need to forego certain friendships just to make him feel comfortable? And what advice do you have for a woman who's had poor boundaries in the past and is trying to improve on this?

Please spare the judgement but I'm relatively new to this. It's something I'm really struggling with and I just want to improve our relationship and show him the respect he deserves and I think this sub may be helpful. Thanks.