How can I cure this toxic idea (Table, Restourant.)

lilycamilly · 2023-06-02T20:14:39+00:00

It might take some conscious self-reprogramming. Whenever you catch yourself thinking these toxic things, recognize the toxicity of it, acknowledge it, and make the CHOICE to say to yourself "that's toxic thinking. What do I really think is going on here? What's a more realistic explanation?". After pursuing this for a while, you'll find yourself skipping over the toxic thought and your mind will head straight for the non-toxic, realistic thought.

Examples from my own experience: seeing someone dressed weirdly. My thought process used to be "Why are they dressed like that? I'd never wear that, they must be a weirdo", then "that's not a nice thing to think about a stranger. People are allowed to wear whatever they want, and I wear things sometimes that somebody else might think is weird. I wouldn't want them to assume I'm a weirdo, so I won't assume this person is a weirdo". The end result becomes "that person is dressed a little odd, but they're not hurting anyone. That must be what they feel good wearing. Good for them for wearing what they please without succumbing to societal pressures"

Therapy is very helpful for this, I'd highly recommend it.

Quo_Usque · 2023-06-02T22:47:27+00:00

You do not have to be strong as a man. “Strong” often means controlling and cruel. You have to be caring, and kind, and consider the needs and wants of others. The controlling man says “we are sitting at this table”. The kind, caring, and considerate man says “which table do you prefer?”

coffeetablestain · 2023-06-02T19:02:26+00:00

The first step is to stop reading about it.

That's also the only step. Seriously, just stop reading about it, stop talking online about it, change your online habits.

No normal, healthy, reasonable adult human being worries about things like this. Redpill and associated cults want to make you worried about a thousand really ridiculous things.

They want to make you worried about things, because when you're worried you will keep coming back to them.

This is exactly the way they teach you to manipulate women, it's what they're doing to you. You are the victim of them manipulating you into thinking a certain way and feeling insecure.

Downtown_Cat_1172 · 2023-06-02T18:33:09+00:00

Just...don't? Assume that your girlfriend is on an equal level with you.

AssistTemporary8422 · 2023-06-03T20:30:22+00:00

Well being able to make choices is an important life skill. Many women do expect the men they are with to make the decisions and dates so they can relax. I'm okay doing that but do not believe in being domineering and controlling and not allowing women to make decisions.

BetaFan49 · 2023-06-04T08:51:27+00:00

Thats like the least harmful idea they talk about 😅😅

MistyMaisel · 2023-06-13T16:01:43+00:00

I've never even heard of this one. Is it a Turkish only prospect? My boyfriend usually asks me if I'm ok with the spot he's selected. And he also asks me many times if I have a preference. And that assumes we have any choice in the matter.

I wouldn't think less of a dude who said "I don't know or I'm not sure". Unless he was like falling apart from it at the seems and seemed ready to cry over this very basic question.

OutcomeNo5846 · 2023-06-02T21:23:25+00:00

Sure fire way to make your girl not respect you and think you’re an indecisive pushover.

Title	How can I cure this toxic idea (Table, Restourant.)
Author	ferikam278
Upvotes	10
Comments	14
Date	June 2, 2023 6:03 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/13yjvuf/how_can_i_cure_this_toxic_idea_table_restourant/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/how-can-i-cure-this-toxic-idea-table-restourant.1221080 https://theredarchive.com/post/1221080

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