Hi everyone, I’m a 28F and I often have this feeling that I’m behind in life. I know in reality, I’m doing well financially/career wise - nothing exceptional though, I have a bachelors degree and make a good living. However, my life just hasn’t turned out the way I thought it would. The older I get, the more I feel depressed about not being married yet, not having children yet. I’ve always had these things in mind but I muted my desires and was swayed by parental guidance to pursue an education and a career more than anything else, they have always heavily discouraged dating while in school/early career.

Now I feel incredibly empty and as though all that focus wasn’t worth it at the end as I have a greater longing to be a wife and take care of my husband and children more than trying to make more money in a career. Now I did have 2 major relationships that failed, first one because my parents advised against it as he was a graduating senior and I was a freshman in college (to be honest he was the best person I could have married out of all the men I dated/talked to afterwards); the second was a big waste of time, dated for 4 years and he was never going to marry me, just empty words - I was definitely a placeholder girlfriend.

So here I am today, I do have a boyfriend but I’m not the most hopeful as he lives overseas in my home country but we’re trying to make it work at the moment, it wouldn’t be easy for him to move here (US). I am going back home to visit family soon though so maybe I feel more confident once we meet in person.

Meanwhile, my peers from secondary school and university are married and more of them have children. And I have absolutely nothing to show for my obedience to my parents and “hard work”.