Pure vs dirty love?

InevitableKiwi5776 · 2023-07-30T12:53:44+00:00

Aren’t you pregnant and on bed rest? Probably he doesn’t want to give the impression that he’s pressuring you into anything right now.

And so many men say they want their wives to initiate more so they can feel desirable.

It doesn’t sound like there is anything actually wrong, it’s just your feelings around it. But you’re also in a complicated situation health and hormonal wise, so maybe that could be making you feel extra emotional too.

flower_power_g1rl · 2023-07-30T10:07:05+00:00

No such thing as pure vs dirty. I disagree with many of your points. It could be that he doesn't ask, because he wants to respect you. A lot of men don't want their girl to feel like she's only being used for sex so they avoid initiating unless they're absolutely sure that she wants it. Personal question, does you being the initiator make you feel insecure? You should talk with him about this in a non-accusatory way.

Bring up the conversation topic of initiation. "Babe, is there a specific way you like to experience initiation for sex? What is the way yo prefer to initiate?" Such questions. Just bring it up, you will learn a lot.

Another possibility is that he initiates in subtle ways that you don't really feel. Like a nonsexual touch, a type of kiss, or even a look of the eyes. It's healthy to want to have sex with a person you love. It's not impure at all.

WhatIsThisAccountFor · 2023-07-30T16:00:31+00:00

Sex is not dirty, especially when it’s with a partner you’re committed to.

If you were raised religious then I could see that believe being something you ascribe to, but if you are not of religious background then sex is not a dirty thing. It can be an expression of love, just like kissing can.

AutoModerator · 2023-07-30T09:44:09+00:00

Title: Pure vs dirty love?

Full text: I might delete this post, because I feel shy posting about this personal issue.

I simply want to ask about our intimate/sex life.

Physical touch is the love language of both of us.

He literally kisses me hundreds of times a day, hugs, and any gesture to show how much he loves me both in our room and in front of the family.

I love him to bits. I feel so attracted to him. We both dont have high libidos individually but whenever I'm in his arms, I want him to proceed to sex. I don't know why. He's here for the weekend only and I can't get enough of him. When he's away for the week the thought of sex doesn't even cross my mind, he otherwise will joke about it on phone.

When he comes home, he immediately wants it, and it's the only time he'll proceed. We have it about 3 times on Saturday sunday, and almost ALWAYS, it's me, just impulsively ask him to have it when I'm lying with him.

He almost always does it lovingly, but immediately after it, I feel regret, a weird kind of, that it's a reverse role. It's men who ask for sex always or atleast mostly. And I know even when he's in deel sleep while changing side he'll kiss me and cuddle me. But not sex. It's like his love is so pure, and mine is tinged with this continous want of sex.

I need advice. I can really control myself if I'm overreacting in it. I don't want to ruin anything or make him feel I'm always too available.

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VasiliyZaitzev · 2023-07-31T14:49:59+00:00

I need advice

Chill out. There’s nothing wrong with a woman initiating sex. In fact, when a man has such a woman, he is usually mentally riding her biography, which will be titled: “The Greatest Woman Who Ever Lived.”

you can always encourage him in various ways, such as:

”Keep going, big fella, you’re about to get lucky.”

”You. Me. Bedroom. Now.”

”I need you inside me.”

”I would like some cock, please.”

Regardless of what you think of the above, they have a 100% success rate when directed to me.

Also, as your love language is physical touch, there’s no reason for you not to ask to receive love in the way that you prefer to receive it. I am also PT, and therefore, when I’m dating a woman who is PT, it is always a joy. Regardless of your husband’s love language I’m sure he’s pretty happy. So stop torturing yourself.

countrylemon · 2023-07-30T16:17:54+00:00

Sounds like you equally have great sexual desire for eachother, the fact that it’s not a huge pull for you outside of when you’re together says it’s the specific person that you’re both drawn to. That’s a beautiful connection! The regret can come from past teachings of what sex should mean to you.

I’m the main initiator in my relationship, felt strange because I too was taught men were the ones to approach. In a modern society men are actually taught to be far more avoidant of putting pressure on women sexually, men looking to impress a woman, they don’t want to be deemed at only sex focused, or seem like a horndog, he likely wants you to feel absolute respect and comfort; so the ball ends up in your court because that’s “safer” for everyone. If you want him to be more aggressive or forward, next time he advances say things like “i love when you can’t keep your hands off me” “i love it when you do this” positively reinforce the things he does that you want more of, and he should want to give you more of that.

Trust that if he’s cuddling and kissing you in his sleep, the man thinks about doing dirty things to you.

All seems good from my view girly, get those emotions about it figured out.

Druidwannabetbh · 2023-07-30T19:33:41+00:00

Yeah, sounds to me that what others are saying is true. At some point earlier in your life you were told, or you learned, or you were otherwise convinced that sex is somehow dirty or only for marriage talent or something like that.

First of all, you need to change your own beliefs. Guys are not the only ones who initiate or ask for sex. Stop it. That is not a thing. There's absolutely no validity to your feeling that you shouldn't be the one to ask. Just stop.

vintagegirlgame · 2023-07-30T21:44:54+00:00

The RPW way would not be to have a convo about his lack of initiating… that’s has an emasculating sense to it, implying that he isn’t keeping you satisfied.

Do you ask with words? The more feminine way to initiate is through body language that lets him know you’re turned on, but wait for him be the one to escalate it to sex.

Laura Doyle’s also advises against any “State Of The Union” convos. Her magic words are “I miss you.” It’s a vulnerable approach that lets him know you want his intimacy.

Title	Pure vs dirty love?
Author	False_Process_2473
Upvotes	9
Comments	9
Date	July 30, 2023 9:44 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/15dhiq7/pure_vs_dirty_love/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/pure-vs-dirty-love.1226886 https://theredarchive.com/post/1226886

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