I am developing an eating disorder

Remandergrowth · 2023-02-03T13:13:32+00:00

Firstly I would suggest seeing a therapist if possible.

But if that is not possible let me tell you a few things.

It's all about health at the end of the day. If you are not healthy now, I would suggest you see a doctor and try and start a fitness regime.
If you are healthy I then assume the question has to relate more to the opposite sex in which case you are likely exaggerating the extent to which they care about your body type. Women do care but not to the extent they will disregard you for being 5% more bodyfat than the super fit guys at the club.

How do I know this? I am having more luck with women now than at any other point in my life and I am not in the most fantastic shape. I am muscle fat rn.

It is common for both men and women to be over critical of their bodies.

Inareskai · 2023-02-03T12:41:45+00:00

I mean, it definitely sounds like you have negative thought spirals that lead to disordered eat. Whether or not you have something actually diagnosable isn't something redditors can tell you.

fathergoose77 · 2023-02-03T19:19:03+00:00

So from what I am observing, your dad has put these ideals into your mind, but for some reason you are projecting these super fit ideals onto what all women want? Are you trying to impress dad or a specific woman?

Does he still say these things to you? Do you still have contact with him/live with him? Is he a big gym nut? Does he see you eat?

Mean_Mechanic9889 · 2023-02-04T11:13:18+00:00

Why? Woman like guys who look like they can survive a winter.

(Woman here 👋) your issue is your victim mindset. Take responsibility, accountability for your life. It's yours, no one else's.

We all have hidden problems, the sexiest girl in the world can be suicidal behind a laugh and joke (trust me I know 😆. . . Joke)

I'm not minimising your experience. I'm being blunt. Short sharp shock. I've got issues. You've got issues. Everyone's got issues. It's how we get back up, not what put us down.

bluemagex2517 · 2023-02-07T14:44:04+00:00

This is way beyond anyone here's ability to help you. But I'll throw some stuff out there just in case. But, honestly dude, you need to talk to your personal care provider and start getting help from professionals as soon as possible. Getting help now, even if you feel like you can handle it on your own, will make things easier and better down the road.

You seem to be stuck in this black and white thinking where either you are "really attractive" or your not. The absolute reality is that people's tastes vary wildly, even if a majority like one thing or another.

Think about what men like, physically, so that we can remove ourselves emotionally from our projections of women: Some guys like really curvy women with big butts and boobs. Some guys have a thing for women who are rail thin with small boobs and athletic or model like builds. Some guys are "chubby chasers" and prefer overweight women. And at any given time there might be a majority of guys who are into one particular body type, but it's always a slim majority and there are always a lot of outliers. And, sure, women who happen to be of that particular body type tend to get the most attention, but other women get plenty of attention to.

It's very similar with the genders flipped, but women show less attention to men in general (because of a lot of social conditioning), so it's not always so obvious from the outside.

That leads me to this question: why do you fee like you have to get the most attention? I can understand desiring some attention, but you specifically said,

looking at a bunch of attractive men and male characters getting more attention

Why does it bother you that some subset of guys are getting more attention? Why is it important to you to get the most attention? Humans crave attention, and despite what some people say it doesn't make you a narcissist to want some attention from people you find attractive. But, it's not healthy or realistic to pine after the people who get the absolute most attention, and even worse to feel like you're deficient if you aren't one of them.

Even without you answering these questions, I would guess that even if you were getting a ton of attention from women, you wouldn't be happy with yourself. I would guess that your self loathing is deeper than that, but you've latched on to this one thing. Deep down you're really insecure, and insecurity isn't a rational thought. Anyone can be insecure and it doesn't have any correlation with how attractive or wealthy or strong or athletic, etc., they actually are. In fact, the only real cure to insecurity is personal validation. You need to be okay with who you are, be okay with how you look. You need to like yourself, not have other's like you. No amount of external validation, no amount of women finding you attractive, will help with this.

debatelord_1 · 2023-02-03T23:38:01+00:00

I'm pretty sure attractive male bodies are typically equipped with quite some muscle. That doesn't come from nowhere. You gotta eat and workout to grow and have an attractive body.

InteractionOk7562 · 2023-02-17T01:33:47+00:00

Cut your calorie intake workout only way to lose weight you can join cross fit bjj something to get you moving

Title	I am developing an eating disorder
Author	AloneForever444
Upvotes	6
Comments	23
Date	February 3, 2023 11:10 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/10shttr/i_am_developing_an_eating_disorder/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/i-am-developing-an-eating-disorder.1230295 https://theredarchive.com/post/1230295

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