My STBXW has gone to the bank and signalled to them that she intends to cease paying the mortgage and let it go into foreclosure. Foreclosure processes here start around three months of non-payment. Joint mortgage, however, the mortgage has typically been drawn from her account with me transferring money as contribution. Is this allowable? In Canada, BTW.

She says we can't afford the mortgage and is also telling me she wants to buy me out. Which begs the question how, if we cannot afford it jointly, will she afford it on her own?

Anyway, my knowledge of foreclosure suggests that if this does proceed as planned, there will be additional exorbitant legal fees, realtor fees, and it may also result in the house selling eventually at well below market value.

I can't accept this as having an equal share of the equity means I have a down payment. Without an equal share, I am living in a one bedroom apartment at $42k and seeing my kids (three of them) when and if she allows it. I want 50/50 custody. A down payment is crucial and anything like a mortgage foreclosure puts that at risk for me. Not so for her.

Frankly, I think this is deliberate as her father has suggested before that she do exactly this. He says that he did this back in the 80's when interest rates were high. He allowed his house to foreclose and then went and bought it outright when it was put up for sale by the bank. Maybe this is true, or maybe not, I have no idea.

I am thinking to go the bank and have them switch the mortgage withdrawals to my account and then tell her to pound sand. And by the way, the daycare bills and the groceries are now your responsibility too. What do you think?