Ghosting after agreeing to a date

hOmIeCoUrt · 2022-07-16T00:35:37+00:00

She probably didn't want to date you mate.

Is this something you want to invest your time in? Is this someone who you think is worth your energy?

jaypb182 · 2022-07-16T14:48:58+00:00

After watching John Anthony and Alex PWF destroying Todd V I would never take anything he says seriously. My eyes are open to how cringy he actually is.

What Alex from PWF says is to respond with a takeaway in order to not appear needy. Such as "I didn't take you for the flaky type" or something along those lines. In my opinion, he has actual game and teaches relevant stuff that isn't overly complicated and downright cringy.

As others have said, I still wouldn't bother pursuing someone who is so disrespectful to my time. But try it out and maybe she has a legit reason for flaking/ghosting you.

Nullroute127 · 2022-07-16T07:07:32+00:00

Did you also follow Todd's advice to do a layered ask? Sounds to me like you might have done things out of sequence or incompletely. IIRC, his sequence would be something like,

"Are you adventurous?"

"How do you feel about drinks and witty banter with cute boys?"

"What's your weekday evening schedule like next week?"

When asked this way, it kind of creates a logic trap. She's adventurous, likes drinks and witty banter, and has free __ days; combined together it's only natural that she go on a date with you.

Regardless of following (or not) the format, the silence is a bad sign. However, you don't have much to lose by trying to see if you can progress this contact. The "...?" line is TECHNICALLY appropriate. It subtly implies that her present silence is incongruent with her previous enthusiasm/pattern. However, it doesn't overcome the likely cause of her going silent at this stage to begin with which is either a lack of value and/or comfort. The "...?" implies you're still pushing for a scheduled date, and you should probably be reading there's an objection here to work through.

So, my play here would be "ping value into the void" in Todd V speak. Send a meme, picture from your day, or other comment. A picture of a cool sunset captioned, "Had to stop to enjoy this" would work. You can then attempt to feel out the vibe for enthusiasm and try for a close again OR even attempt something of a new open to build comfort/value.

My personal twist on Todd's style is the Chris Voss "no" oriented question. I think the 'yes ladder' is too jaded at this point, and it reminds people of shady salesmen.

"Are you the kind of person who never takes risks?"

"Do you dislike drinks and witty banter with cute boys?"

"Would it be crazy if we got a drink at __ on ___ ?"

Women are naturally inclined, when faced with any form of uncertainty, to say 'no' as a default. According to Voss "No" makes people feel safe and in control. I don't think I can scientifically prove that this is superior in a dating context, but it feels more successful.

LifeisLife1234 · 2022-07-16T14:59:28+00:00

When you say ghosting after agreeing to a date, do you mean she blew off the date or is not texting you now that the date is set?

Leave it alone and confirm the day of the date. If she doesn't respond, then she ghosted. Otherwise, she may just not feel like chatting until the date.

Title	Ghosting after agreeing to a date
Author	LifeisLife1234
Upvotes	2
Comments	7
Date	July 16, 2022 12:28 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/w03gjp/ghosting_after_agreeing_to_a_date/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/ghosting-after-agreeing-to-a-date.1254396 https://theredarchive.com/post/1254396

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