How long do you take before asking her out (online dating)?

Canadian-Seductioner · 2021-12-07T04:43:01+00:00

I just ask her out after a few messages back and forth so it just depends on however long it takes for the girl to respond. Sometimes it takes 15 minutes, other times 1-2 days.

1990MeWuzBorn · 2021-12-07T09:59:57+00:00

Just build some quick rapport and ask them to meet up for drinks or coffee within 36 hours of matching. Sometimes I ask sooner — other dudes are doing the exact same thing and will ask before you if you take too long.

nikgos · 2021-12-07T14:07:22+00:00

Here is the basic formula I follow with online dating that got me 6 dates in the past month and only 2 canceled.

1) Exchange a few messages on the app and ask for contact details. I usually go for Instagram as there is social proof that can work in your favor there (that is ofc if you've put work on your ig because if you haven't it could actually have the exact opposite effect).

2) Make a soft suggestion for meeting up after a few messages on ig. She'll either be super enthusiastic and from there you just need to sort out the logistics (doesn't happen super often and that's why most of the advice on this sub doesn't work as a really small percentage of girls will agree to go out with you only after a few messages plus the flakiness rate will be super hight) or she'll be neutral about it. Regardless of her response, it's much better to make a soft suggestion before a hard ask. You wanna start planting the seeds for meeting up early on.

3) Find something to connect about but keep it playful. What I usually like to do is to have two parallel convos - one for having fun, flirting and one for connecting. Another thing that I like about texting on ig is that you can see which celebrities you both follow or in some rare cases you might have a mutual friend. This makes finding topics for connecting much easier. Also, you can see what she's posting on her story which will give you more clues about her personality which is important with the next step.

5) If there is still nothing concrete in place I'd just send a few more messages and go for a direct ask now. At this point, she'll either agree straight away, and from then it's about taking care of the logistics again but more often than not she'll just make some excuse. Maybe she's just looking for validation, maybe she needs to connect more, maybe you messed it up. I'll just exchange a few messages leave it there for a bit and reengage in a few days. Since it's ig she'll most likely reengage back. Thing is that at this point you gotta be a bit patient. I have texted on and off with a girl for about 3 months before we finally went out. Needless to say this wouldn't have happened if I kept the convo on a dating app.

6) When you got an agreed time I personally wouldn't drop the convo entirely. Now if it's for the same day or the following day you can do that but generally, if it's more I'd keep the convo going for a bit more. I won't be texting back and forth tho but rather be leaving a few hours between messages just so time passes but kinda keeping myself in her mind. Again this goes against the advice on this sub but if I agree to hang out with a girl 3-4-5 days from when it was agreed and drop the convo and only reengage on the day of the date then it's almost guaranteed she will come up with some bullshit excuse why she can't make it. and off with a girl for about 3 months before we finally went out. Needless to say, this wouldn't have happened if I kept the convo on Tinder.

6) When you got an agreed time and place to hang out I personally wouldn't drop the convo entirely. Now if it's for the same day or the following day you can do that but generally, if it's more I'd keep the convo going for a bit more. I won't be texting back and forth tho but rather I'll be leaving a few hours between messages just so time passes but kinda keeping myself in her mind. Again this goes against the advice on this sub but if I agree to hang out with a girl 3-4-5 days from when it was agreed and drop the convo and only reengage on the day of the date then it's almost guaranteed she will come up with some bullshit excuse why she can't make it. That's just my experience tho.

And this is it. It's nothing too groundbreaking and some of the advice goes against what you'll read on this sub but this is what brought me real results from Tinder.

BrummieAMN19 · 2021-12-07T16:38:39+00:00

No more than 3 screenshots at the most until I go for the soft close and the hard close which is going for her number.

Potz666 · 2021-12-07T06:54:59+00:00

Don't try build a connection over text, you are not a human to the other person at that point. A connection is built in person, I aim to setup a date same day we match, set it up for less than 7 days in the future

JAE_7502 · 2021-12-07T03:18:40+00:00

5-7 messages normally over 2 days.

Aureayte · 2021-12-07T03:34:56+00:00

1-2 days before my schedule is free

Title	How long do you take before asking her out (online dating)?
Author	LifeisLife1234
Upvotes	10
Comments	8
Date	December 7, 2021 2:36 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/raojje/how_long_do_you_take_before_asking_her_out_online/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-long-do-you-take-before-asking-her-out-online.1271166 https://theredarchive.com/post/1271166

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