What's the best advice you've heard in overcoming fear? Doesn't have to be necessarily just for pickup, but for life...

hopeless_bromantic · 2012-07-26T14:53:19+00:00

This is morbid. I'm sorry. I crush fear by reverse psychology-ing my way out of it. I essentially make my own mortality the scariest thing in my brain and it crushes whatever BULLSHIT MADE UP FEAR I think is really trendy in my brain at that moment. Before I do whatever scares me I say, out loud, this phrase.

"Hey hopeless_bromantic. You're going to die soon. Probably too soon." Then I pause and let that mantra wash over me.

The parts that come after that don't matter. Things will flash through your head that you didn't ever dream of thinking about, and they will be different every time. Maybe I should spring for that cool wedding gift for my buddy, how cool would it be to travel to Hong Kong? Have I ever really given into these deep feelings of wanting to have sex with a tranny? Is my mom ever going to know how much I love her? Should I deck that kid in the face at my high school reunion? Why do I eat Klondikes all the time, what bout healthy shit? The final thought you always have is "Wow. There's no time. I have to get to work immediately. I have to make this count."

Now how scared are you of whatever the fuck you didn't want to do in the first place? You're not. You're going to die. Life's a ride, man. You're dying right now. You're dying. Do you want to have a "fuck it" attitude? Think of it like this. Ever procrastinated before a big paper was due, or project, or interview, or whatever? Cool- you're procrastinating your life right now- and nobody gives you a letter grade at the end, or a sweet job, or 72 virgins. You just fucking die. Dead. Right into the ground. there are no HBs at the cemetery.

Now go do whatever dumb thing you thought was important to be scared about 5 minutes ago.

Geovicsha · 2012-07-26T09:03:33+00:00

There is no fear in the now.

Nicolay77 · 2012-07-26T21:22:42+00:00

Bran- "Can a man still be brave when he's afraid?"

Eddard - "That's the only time a man can be brave.

shahar2k · 2012-07-26T10:57:36+00:00

learn to love the fear, that sensation that comes over you when you're pushing yourself into a situation you arent ready for. As a kid I had a huge fear of both needles and heights; I consciously decided to just push into the feeling, see how much I can feel of the fear every time.
kept leaning over ledges, forcing myself to just look at the doctor while getting blood taken, stuff like that. eventually the fear got weaker, I got used to it, I could simply do things without feeling it.
same goes for later on in my life fear of public speaking. I would simply do it, gave speeches impromptu at birthdays and weddings, without preparing anything. Fear of approaching people is the same thing, hell I LOVE that nervous feeling, it's like a rush, you learn that all it means is that you are pushing yourself somewhere new.

embrace that shit.

eventually the rush goes away, but hell you can always find something that challenges you even more :)

RedErin · 2012-07-26T14:01:52+00:00

Fake it til you make it.

Your brain is malleable. You can shape it to do anything you want. That's what true "Free Will" is.

itsmevichet · 2012-07-26T13:36:38+00:00

Even the bravest person you know still feels fear.

That person just accepts it, embraces it, and does what they need to do in spite of it.

If you have goals, fear changes NOTHING about what you need to do to achieve them.

You simply need to do.

Ask Michael Jordan if he was ever nervous in a championship game, even after winning six rings.

Ask any Olympian who has made a final, realizing that they are one of the best six/eight/twelve people in the world, if they didn't feel a bit of fear.

Ask anyone who has done anything worth it, if there wasn't doubt and fear at some point in the process.

The successful people get USED to fear.

coyotelime · 2012-07-26T17:42:12+00:00

DGAF

2012-07-26T17:14:33+00:00

fear the alternative more than you fear the action you are trying to accomplish

kid-vicious · 2012-07-27T03:17:34+00:00

You will be significantly happier with yourself if you say fuck it and TRY IT and fail, than if you choke up and DON'T and are left wondering WTF could have been.

DlmaoC · 2012-07-26T15:30:53+00:00

YOLO.

2012-07-26T16:45:05+00:00

Put simply? Just do it.

2012-07-26T18:18:55+00:00

I think about what that action would mean in the grand scheme of things. I'll use the example of going to talk to that cute girl you see. Talking to that cute girl in light of all the things that are going on has no significance. It's not going to change the world, it won't say, "Bradman failed terribly at talking to a cute girl on July 26th, 2012" in a history book, it won't make the world stop spinning, whether you succeed or fail with her. If the interaction does fail, the worst that could happens is she sees you as "another guy" that is hitting on her and you learn a lesson on interacting better with the next girl that you see. If you succeed you can develop a relationship with her and get laid (depending on what your goals are). Basically, you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

Also, think about how much better you will feel going after something you want than being too afraid to overcome an illusion (your fear). Personally, I feel great after shutting the voice of fear in my head and taking action (no matter what the outcome is). You grow as a person when you overcome fear and it weakens over time as you continually overcome it. When you succumb yourself to fear it only gets stronger and only makes situations more fearful for you.

Peg_leg_tim_arg · 2012-07-27T14:14:31+00:00

Fear cuts deeper than swords

fl2re · 2012-07-27T18:49:11+00:00

Best thing on fear I've heard: "What do I fear? I fear stagnation and lack of progress. I fear never reaching my potential and being average. I fear being forgotten... the past.. yesterday's news. I fear giving up and being passed by, going softly into that good night. I fear letting those I love down, letting myself down. I fear settling, giving in to the "that's just the way it is" mindset. I fear dying without leaving my mark. I fear not feeling these fears anymore and just floating along. These fears feed me, they nourish my drive.

I love my fear."

Title	What's the best advice you've heard in overcoming fear? Doesn't have to be necessarily just for pickup, but for life...
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	17
Comments	20
Date	July 26, 2012 7:10 AM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/x6g82/whats_the_best_advice_youve_heard_in_overcoming/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/whats-the-best-advice-youve-heard-in-overcoming.1296366 https://theredarchive.com/post/1296366

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