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[–]TheMinistryOfAwesome 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Well frankly it's terribly defeatist attitude to take. Okay they're better looking than you - I guess that means you'll never pull a girl right? Or maybe that no chick, hot or otherwise would ever contemplate letting you put your dick in them? Imagine their response to the idea that you might make a good LTR candidate? Ha! Ridiculous.
Now that the silliness is out of the way lets be a little bit more realistic and not cynically nihilistic.
As is mentioned over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over (ad nauseum) there is less of an emphasis on appearance for men, which is definitely in your favour if you're less attractive than your friends. But ultimately you shouldn't feel bad.
As I finish reading your post it seems that there's almost no point replying because you are so negative that it edges on suspicious. However, because I'm such a wonderful and nice person I'll answer anyway.
How have you felt through your life? How have they felt through their life? Have they been validated? Have you been validated? This is why your personalities are probably different and why they can easily pull off "being more alpha" than you.
Ultimately the answer is this:
The more you practice the more it will be come part of you. Peoples personality can chance, you just need to drill over and over and over.
[–][deleted] 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–]TheMinistryOfAwesome 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Follow advice - as much as I complain about the trawling in seddit there is a lot of gold here.
Individually these things might seem relatively little. For example, i'm still overweight, but I dropped down 25kg recently and have taken up competitive boxing and muay thai - months passed, i got my ass kicked a lot but i got fitter sometimes, less fit when i had to take time off, but all in all there was never a single step from zero to hero. However, when you start adding these little pieces together and bringing all this to bear actually the changes do become noticeable.
I'll give you some of the thinks that I've done that really helped - and let you know some of the problems I had. I am 32 years old and basically discovered the internet at age 13. FRom there it was downhill, gamer geek kind of lazy, very into immediate gratification; I want to an all boys school and between the ages of 13 and 18 0 (absolutely) zero positive experiences with girls.
Sometimes I would talk with a girl online and they were all flirty and wonderful then we'd trade pictures and they'd just disappear. As a result of this, i basically learned not to give my pictures out. I also became conditioned to not take pictures. It was fucking brutal. My university years was spent basically being the lame beta bitch who virtue signals all over the place (turning down sex - and not necessarily with super hot girls, just average - because i "couldn't imagine myself fucking someone i didnt want to be with or be with somebody i didn't imagine being with forewver" - I was a dreamer, and basically a man-bitch.
Then I met a girl from the internet, managed to somehow convince her i was attractive and had a decade long relationship with the girl. It got worse and worse and worse until by the end I had to end it because she had no respect for me at all - which manifest in so many different ways (no cheating, which means i'm safe from the bitter bitchiness of the majority of /r/theredpill) but ultimately it was heartbreaking. It also put the fear into me about being alone the rest of my life.
Anyway, I read, I learned and i discovered the one thing that probably made everything better again.
If you follow these steps and every day follow some of the things people have outlined above (and more below) then slowly but surely you will elevate and with that will come more success with women. Continual improvement.
Workout: just do it, get your fitness on point. There are untold benefits for this, testosterone, confidence, strength, social interactions etc.
Don't whine
Try not to say things that seem to be for the reason "I am trying to show how good i am" (example: Oh I've been to 16 differnt countries blah blah blah)
Just talk to people. If you're in an elevator, just say hi make comments and talk - doesn't matter who they are.
Try to be more socially active (not just random short encounters) but join clubs and social groups.
Invest in yourself: read, spend an extra few dollars on a pair of jeans if they're better quality and look good rather than cheaper, make sure you're well groomed
Find people that you admire and figure out exactly what it is you admire about them
Try to change the pace of your life regularly. If you spend most of your day infront of a computer, just do something else to change the pace. You need time to think and you need things to slow down and speed up. Go for a walk, read a book, etc.
I appreciate that this might have just been "poor me but now look how good I am" but what I am trying to emphasise here is that you CAN go from zero to hero. Happiness is a side effect of achieving things in life you want.
I also appreciate that this might have been repetitive and dull.. but i was brain splurging.
TL;DR - unlucky
[–]mad-n-fla 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Hit the gym?
Shave your head?
Be your own unique self.
[–]depredador93 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Looks don't matter. The fact that you believe it matters, is what holds you back dude.
I've seen both short and bald guys hang out with gorgeous women...
[–]Turlast 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
No good can ever come from jealousy. It's a natural feeling that everyone falls victim to, but it's ultimately venom. Be the best you. Work out, find hobbies, stop talking down on yourself, and don't even think suicide. You're 23, not 83. Stop talking like your life is over.
[–]leprogrammist 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I used to know a guy. He was 1.80m and "attractive". I would go out with him. He was afraid of approaching, while I was killing it. I always opened first. He just stood there. A pretty girl would come or send a girl to bring him to their table. Never happened to me in my whole life. Funny story - I always made out earlier than him. He would just get the contact and leave. When he was chatting online, I was already in bed with the other girl. And it was like a this a couple of times. Part of me was jealous that this guy never needed to work for it. Part of me recognized that with a little effort I could outperform him. However my girls never were as pretty, although I consider myself good looking.
[–]nonsass 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I've been cursed with really good looking friends my whole life, so I know how you feel! One of them was an actual model. The other one was actually even better looking (in most peoples eyes) but was a tree surgeon. They had girls THROWING themselves at them and approaching them non stop. It was ridiclous.
The model had zero personality but still obviously slayed, and the tree surgeon was a really cool guy in fairness and kind of funny. He could have actually done even better than the model, but he had a serious girlfriend and only occasionally cheated on her, but usually showed restraint.
All I can say is that no good comes from jealousy, though. It eats you up.
On thing that always give me hope, is that I've also known a few very average looking guys who do very well with girls, although they just have to work much much harder. They never get approached. They do the approaching. They never learnt 'game', but they are very confident people and are just very social. It's possible for us uglier guys to get laid, but not as easily as the handsome guys.
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[–]TheMinistryOfAwesome 1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]TheMinistryOfAwesome 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]mad-n-fla 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]depredador93 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Turlast 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]leprogrammist 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]nonsass 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link