Coming from a frame of abundance vs talking to her like you want her - a paradox

rococo78 · 2012-08-05T16:58:22+00:00

I think you're thinking about it wrong. If you like a girl or are attracted to her, you are. It doesn't matter if you got five girls at home or not. That might raise the bar but it won't kill your attraction for other women.

If sex is something you partake in often, you're going to talk about it and get comfortable talking about it. You could talk at length and any other hobby you've got, why not sex?

I feel like you're coming from a place of neediness and that's messing you up. Creepiness almost always stems from neediness. You can talk about sex without seeming needy. It just comes across very matter of fact.

So spend some time on you and figure out why you're important. And keep going out and practicing. But learning how to talk about sex is a fairly advanced skill but an important one too. Once I figured it out better my game shot through the roof.

blinkyone · 2012-08-05T18:12:27+00:00

Too much justification here. Abundance is a mindset. Being able to be outcome independent, knowing you have the ability to finesse away and talk to another girl.

Frame is the overall vibe and theme you're projecting. Sexual frame to assert f-close. Dating frame is, well, you know date and seeking relationship candidcy.

SpinMyRiki · 2012-08-05T16:50:38+00:00

demonstrating sexual interest shows neediness? since when?

it's the men who are afraid to express themselves and their wishes confidently that come across as needy, as someone who NEEDS a woman to help him come out of his shell. thats neediness!

2012-08-05T15:49:51+00:00

Doesn't have to be needy if you're teasing her a bit (subtext: you know she wants it)

dillpiccolol · 2012-08-05T17:39:21+00:00

It's a balance, imo

2012-08-05T14:22:05+00:00

This is why frames are bullshit. Don't be in a 'frame', be yourself. If you're banging 5 women, act like you're banging 5 women. If you're not, don't pretend you are, that's fucking stupid.

With that in mind, if you have 5 women on the go, no you probably wouldn't be looking for a 6th. But you're not banging 5 women, so act like you're not banging anyone, aka the truth.

Also, regardless of my opinions on frames, it still doesn't make sense, because if you've got 5 girls in to bed, you're gonna have to talk about some sex at some point...and what does NoFap have to do with any of this? O_o Also, why would talking sexually be needy?

tl;dr: What are you on about?

NomadicBit · 2012-08-06T17:00:54+00:00

Its not a paradox. A frame of abundance is a fact as well as wanting her. One doesn't affect the other. Just because you want that one girl, the others aren't going to just disappear. When people say come from a frame of abundance they really mean be outcome independent. A guy who has abundance isn't afraid to touch a girl, he isn't afraid to make his intentions known, he isn't afraid of rubbing her the wrong way. Why? Because he has a life of abundance. If things don't work out in set, then on to the next...or maybe I'll just make a booty call.

Title	Coming from a frame of abundance vs talking to her like you want her - a paradox
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	3
Comments	10
Date	August 5, 2012 1:41 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/xpphe/coming_from_a_frame_of_abundance_vs_talking_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/coming-from-a-frame-of-abundance-vs-talking-to-her.1303375 https://theredarchive.com/post/1303375

Comments